Tula Quotes in

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Tula Quotes:

  • Tula: [to Nick Murder] G-strings, push-up bras, teddies, garter belts, crotchless pantyhose. Fuck bloomers. That's what I sell. To rich, tan, bored housewives who take the fat from the ass cheeks and inject it into their lips. You gonna kiss someone's ass then you should know that that's what you're kissing. Personally, I think that kissing's sexier than shagging, but you're sucking on chicken fat there. Not that their husbands mind. You know, they're out buying big homes, buying paintings, going to the fuckin' opera, taking one up the bum for the queen while the misses are out sticking their fannies in my face. "Does my bum look big in this? Can you see my cellulite?" What they need, these women, is a good old-fashioned horse-fuck. They can buy all the new panties they want, but they get stained, don't they? Stained panties are part of life no matter how hard you wipe.

    Tula: I think you're dead sexy. Not at first, then one day I looked up and saw you working with your shirt off and your gut out. That's a man, I said to meself. A real man. Someone to take me down the pub for a pint. You're way too old for me, but I figure you only go around once in life. I got, what, 75 years? Don't get hit by a bus. I want to kiss you, big man. Give you a big sloppy, wet kiss. You won't tell anyone that? Inch by inch the elephant fucked the ant.

  • Tula: When a woman bends over, a man sees a jelly doughnut. Her brain expands. His explodes. Dead on arrival in her powdered jelly doughnut.

  • Tula: How you do?

    Kingsland: Well, am I seeing things or is this a white woman?

    Flint: Portuguese.

  • Tula: [Tula has just given a drink of "gin" to a tribal chieftain; he refuses to return the bottle] I hate to see good gin wasted on a dried-up monkey like that.

    Cookie Harris: That's not gin I gave him - - that's kerosene.

    [Cookie and Tula look at the chief, happily drinking the "gin," and both giggle]

  • Tula: You give me new trade silk. You give me many new bangles. And you give me...

    Flint: Stop bothering me, it's too hot. Get outta here.

    Tula: Other men DON"T find it too HOT for Tula.

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