Homer Quotes in


Homer Quotes:

  • Mae: Look, I'll take care of him!

    Homer: You can't, Mae. I turned you, I taught you.

    Mae: Well I turned him and I can teach him!

    Severen: [smirking] What's the matter, Homer? You jealous? A little too little to be jealous.

    Homer: You have any idea what it's like to be a big man on the inside and have a small body on the outside?

    Severen: You have ANY idea what it's like to HEAR about it every NIGHT?

  • Severen: I'm your worst fuckin' nightmare. Severen.

    Homer: And I'm Homer. That's H-O-M-E-R. Mispronounce it and I wouldn't wanna be you

  • Homer: [to John] Dad, I may not be the best, but I come to believe that I got it in me to be somebody in this world. And it's not because I'm so different from you either, it's because I'm the same. I mean, I can be just as hard-headed, and just as tough. I only hope I can be as good a man as you. Sure, Wernher von Braun is a great scientist? but he isn't my hero.

  • Homer: No. Coal mining may be your life, but it's not mine. I'm never going down there again. I wanna go into space.

  • Quentin: What do you want to know about rockets?

    Homer: Everything.

  • Homer: Man, we should be trying to get into that science fair instead of sitting around here like a bunch of hillbillies.

    Roy Lee: Well, I got some real sad news for you Homer. We *are* a bunch of hillbillies.

  • O'Dell: God's honest truth, Homer. What are the chances... a bunch of kids from Coalwood... actually winning the national science fair?

    Homer: A million to one, O'Dell.

    O'Dell: That good? Well, why didn't you say so?

  • Homer: [to his dad] Sure Dr. Von Braun is a great scientist, but he isn't my hero.

  • Homer: Listen, I'm sorry about what's going on around here, but it isn't my fault! What do you want from me anyway?

    John: You better watch yourself, Homer.

    Homer: If I go on to win at Indianapolis, I can go to college, maybe even get a job at Cape Canaveral. There's nothing here for me. The town is dying! The mine is dying! Everybody here knows that but you!

    John: You want to get out so bad, then go. Go!

    Homer: Yeah, I'll go! Yeah, I'll go!

    John: GO! GO!

    Homer: And I'll be gone forever! I won't even look back!

  • Homer: You know, it, uh, won't fly unless somebody pushes the button. It's yours, if you want it.

  • Homer: [gunshot in background] Hey Quentin!

    [another gunshot]

    Homer: That rocket had to have gone up at least 100 feet didn't it?

    Quentin: More like two hundred.

    [another gunshot]

    Homer: Goddammit.

    Homer: [another gunshot] Will you cut it out, Roy Lee?

    Roy Lee: Die you son of a bitch!

    [fires another round into the grill of his broken down car]

  • Homer: [after Homer sees the tiny shack that Quentin lives in with his family] Quentin, I wouldn't care if you lived in the Governor's mansion. I'd still think you're weird!

  • Homer: [Reading the newspaper aloud] "The silvery cylinder burst forth in a fiery column of smoke and flame, racing the very wind as it soared into the sky, a messenger of these Rocket Boys of Big Creek.


    Homer: These boys use their brains, not brawn, who play not football, but with Apollo's fire."

    O'Dell: [Chuckles]

    Dorothy Platt: [Walks up to Homer, elated] Hi Homer.

    Homer: [Quietly] Hi Dorothy.

    Dorothy Platt: Would you please sign my newspaper?

    Homer: Sure.

    Dorothy Platt: I just know you're going to be really famous someday.

    Homer: [Stares at Dorothy, mesmerized]

    Roy Lee: H - O - M - E - R

  • Homer: Why're the jocks the only ones who get to go to college?

    Roy Lee: They're also the only ones who get the girls.

  • Homer: [jumps into Roy Lee's car to go to football tryouts] Let's go, Roy Lee! It's almost nine.

    Roy Lee: You sure are in a hurry to get yourself killed, huh, kid?

    O'Dell: There are easier ways to commit suicide, Homer.

    Homer: Would you just step on it, Roy Lee?

    Roy Lee: [frustrated with his car] I *am* stepping on it.

  • Homer: Did you ever see Frankenstein and the wolf man?

  • Jim Hickam: [at football practice] Hey, Lenny; take it easy on my kid brother, but make it look good, all right?

    Jim Hickam: [Homer is tackled hard] I thought I told you to take it easy on him.

    Lenny: I *did* take it easy on him

    Homer: [playing against Lenny] I'm gonna run right over you, you son of a bitch! You hear me?

    [is tackled several times more]

    Coach Gainer: [helping Homer up] Well, Homer, you've sure got guts; but ya gotta know when to quit.

  • O'Dell: Besides, didn't your dad say no more rockets?

    Homer: No, he said no more rockets on company property.

    O'Dell: Do you realize how far we'd have to go to be off company property?

    Homer: Yeah, we'd have to go to Snakeroot.

    Quentin: Snakeroot? That's eight miles!

    Homer: It's not *that* far. I mean we could walk if we had to...

    O'Dell: Hey, walk! Heh! That's a great idea!

    Homer: Come on let's go!

    Roy Lee: Wait the hell up, will you Homer? Now I got about as much chance of winning that science fair as you do winning a football scholarship. I know I'm gonna be a miner. I've known my entire life. What the hell's so bad about mining coal anyway?

    Homer: Nothing Roy Lee. It's great. That's why your stepdaddy is the biggest drunk in West Virginia! I mean, come on guys! You know the mine'll kill you!

    [to Quentin]

    Homer: You ever hear the story about how O'Dell's dad died?

    Roy Lee: Homer... will you forget it, man?

    O'Dell: Shutup Homer.

    Homer: Piece of slate caught him right in the neck... and it cut his head clear off.

    O'Dell: [tackles Homer] You son of a bitch!

  • HomerRoy LeeO'Dell: [after lighting their first rocket] Ten, nine, eight...

    Roy Lee: Should we get behind something?

    [it blows up and they fly back]

  • John: [after a cave in] Come on. Come on, Jensen. Come on back.

    Jensen: What happened?

    Jake Mosby: Whole damn mountain about fell on your head. And John here, he saved your life.

    Homer: That's my dad.

    John: I want you out of this mine, and don't you ever come back, you stupid son of a bitch. Didn't I tell you to watch those pillars? Now we coulda all been killed today, because you didn't have the sense to look up!

    Homer: [ashamed] That's my dad.

  • Homer: Well actually, my family raised me and send me to school and feed me and all that other stuff my friends didn't do. Besides who cares about my launch!

  • Homer: My family is not more important than my friends. My dad won't even come to one launch!

  • Homer: It's extraordinary! Where do you learn all those languages?

    Illya: In bed.

  • Homer: She killed them. Medea herself, does she not say, "I killed my children"?

    Illya: And you believe her? You don't understand the women. Medea loves her husband, yes?

    Homer: Yes.

    Illya: Her husband is interested in another woman? Yes?

    Homer: Yes.

    Illya: So she said to her husband that she has killed her children to frighten him, to get him back.

    Homer: No!

    Illya: Yes. She gets him back, and everybody go away and everybody is happy and they go to the seashore. And that's all!

    Homer: If I show you that everything that was ever written about Medea talks of her killing her children. If you ask 10 out of 10 people who saw the play and they tell you it's true, then by simple logic... You're a Greek, you should be logical.

    Illya: Why?

    Homer: Because the greatest Greek of them all, Aristotle, invented logic. He said...

    Illya: Who?

    Homer: Aristotle.

    Illya: The one that the Captain said thinks men are everything and women are nothing? I don't care what he said, Aristotle.

  • The Captain: Illia's happy. She's worked out a way of living. Let her alone.

    Homer: No, it's impossible. A whore can't be happy. A whorish world can't be happy. I'd like to reach her mind.

    The Captain: What do you want to put in her mind?

    Homer: Reason, in place of fantasy. Morality, instead of immorality. I've got to educate her. Transform her.

    The Captain: Remember what happened to Pygmalion.

    Homer: I wouldn't make that mistake. She is lovely. But for me, she's not a woman; she's an idea. She's an outlaw. Yes! Can't you see? The law must be established everywhere.

    The Captain: I see you'll have black eyes all your life.

  • Homer: You're barbarians. You don't need a philosopher, you need a missionary.

  • Homer: Because you are the whole world. Beautiful and corrupt.

  • [last lines]

    Homer: Goodnight, you princes of Maine. You kings of New England.

  • [Candy is sitting on a dock: inconsolable after receiving the news about Wally]

    Homer: Just tell me. I'll do whatever you wanna do.

    Candy Kendall: Nothing.

    Homer: Isn't that like waiting and seeing?

    Candy Kendall: No. Nothing's nothing. I want Wally to come home. I'm afraid to see him too.

    Homer: I know.

    [Homer starts to put him arm around her and pull her close]

    Candy Kendall: Oh, don't do that, Homer.

    [Dejected, he puts both hands in his own lap]

    Candy Kendall: I just want to sit here and do nothing.

    Homer: To do nothing. It's a great idea, really. Maybe if I just wait and see long enough, then I won't have to do anything or decide anything, you know? I mean, maybe if I'm lucky enough, someone else will decide and choose and do things for me.

    Candy Kendall: What are you talking about?

    Homer: But then again, maybe I won't be that lucky. And it's not my fault. It's not your fault. And that's just it. Someone's gonna get hurt, and it's no one's fault.

    Candy Kendall: I don't want to talk about this.

    Homer: If we just sit here and, we wait and see a little longer, then maybe you won't to choose, and I won't have to *do* anything!

    Candy Kendall: What do you want from me? Wally's been shot down. He's paralyzed. What do you want me to do?

    Homer: Nothing. I'm sorry. You're not the one who has to do anything.

  • Buster: [digging grave of botched abortion victim] What did she die of?

    Dr. Wilbur Larch: She died of secrecy. She died of... ignorance. Homer, did you expect to be responsible for their children, you have to give them the right to decide whether or not to have children. Wouldn't you agree?

    Homer: I'm not excepting people to be responsible enough to control themselves to begin with.

  • [We see Homer writing to Dr. Larch and hear the words in his voice as we are shown variously relevant scenes]

    Homer: Dear Dr. Larch. Thank you for your doctor's bag, although it seems that I will not have the occasion to use it, barring some emergency, of course. I am not a doctor. With all due respect to your profession, I'm enjoying my life here. I'm enjoying being a lobsterman and orchardman. In fact, I've never enjoyed myself as much. The truth is, I want to stay here. I believe I'm being of some use.

    [We hear the words Dr. Larch writes back to Homer in response]

    Dr. Wilbur Larch: My Dear Homer: I thought you were over you adolescence - the first time in our lives when we imagine we have something terrible to hide from those who love us. Do you think it's not obvious to us what's happened to you? You've fallen in love, haven't you? By the way, whatever you're up to can't be too good for your heart. Then again, it's the sort of condition that could be made worse by worrying about it, so don't worry about it.

    [the back and forth correspondence continues interwoven with scenes from Homer's life at the time]

    Homer: Dear Dr. Larch, What I'm learning her may not be as important as what I learned from you, but everything is new to me. Yesterday, I learned how to poison mice. Field mice girdle an apple tree; pine mice kill the roots. You use poison oats and poison corn. I know what you have to do. You have to play God. Well, killing mice is as close as I want to come to playing God.

    Dr. Wilbur Larch: Homer, here in St. Cloud's, I have been given the opportunity of playing God or leaving practically everything up to chance. Men and women of conscience should sieze those moments when it's possible to play God. There won't be many. Do I interfere when absolutely helpless women tell me they simply can't have an abortion - that they simply must go through with having another and yet another orphan? I do not. I do not even recommend. I just give them what they want. You are my work of art, Homer. Everything else has been just a job. I don't know if you have a work of art in you, but I know what your job is: you're a doctor.

    Homer: I'm not a doctor.

    Dr. Wilbur Larch: You're going to replace me, Homer. The board of trustees is looking for my replacement.

    Homer: I can't replace you. I'm sorry.

    Dr. Wilbur Larch: "Sorry"? I'm not sorry. Not for anything I've done. I'm not even sorry that I love you.

    [Cut to scene of Dr. Larch sitting on a hospital bed reading Homer's letter. He is crest-fallen and one of his nurses sits down to console him]

    Dr. Wilbur Larch: [Speaking to the nurse] I think we may have lost him to the world.

  • [Mr. Rose has a hold on his daughter to keep her from riding off on her bike to get away in the middle of the night]

    Arthur Rose: Hey, nothin', man. You just go in the house. This ain't none of your concern.

    Homer: Just listen to me...

    Arthur Rose: You are forgettin' yourself now. This is my daughter! Now, I believe ya have your own mess ya gotta deal with.

    Rose Rose: [Struggling to get free from her father] I wanna get...

    Arthur Rose: Ain't that right, Homer? Ain't that right, Homer? My daughter done told ya and I done told ya. This ain't your business. This ain't none of your business! Ya even know what your business is, Homer? Do ya! Come on, man! What is your business?

    Homer: I'm in the doctor business. I can help. That's all I'm saying. I can help.

    [Mixture of astonishment and relief washes over the Roses]

  • Homer: I'm just not supposed to get excited, you know. No strain. No stress. I try to keep calm all the time.

    Wally Worthington: I can't imagine there's any strain or stress around here.

  • Homer: Why you no like Homer?

    Pvt. John Reese: You got no business up here. When the Krauts come, they'll capture you and pull your fingernails. Then you'll tell them everything they want to know.

    Homer: No!

  • [examining a mutilated piece of meat]

    Richard Tarbell: Could roaches do that?

    Homer: Yeah, if they had a knife and fork.

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