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There's a difference between a philosophy and a bumper sticker. -- Charles M. Schulz
Together we will build an America where hope is a new job with a paycheck, not a faded word on an old bumper sticker. -- Mitt Romney
We should just get somebody from the left and the right and they should all throw bumper stickers at each other and the first one to cover the other one wins. -- David Cross
A lot of people don't like bumper stickers. I don't mind bumper stickers. To me a bumper sticker is a shortcut. It's like a little sign that says 'Hey, let's never hang out.' -- Demetri Martin
Genius has its limitations. Insanity...not so much" -Bumper Sticker -- Darynda Jones
A Nuns Life: Chastity, poverty, and obedience. Wait, chastity?" BUMPER STICKER -- Darynda Jones
Yeah, but what happens if life hands me pickles? - Bumper sticker -- Darynda Jones
There is nothing to fear but fear itself. And spiders. ~Bumper sticker~ -- Darynda Jones
Where am I going and why am I in this handbasket? ~Bumper sticker~ -- Darynda Jones
A bumper of good liquor Will end a contest quicker Than justice, judge or vicar. -- Richard Brinsley Sheridan
Cars and bumper cars are two very different things. NEVER sleep in a bumper car. -- Craig Benzine
I love children, but I don't think I can eat a whole one.- Bumper sticker -- Darynda Jones
The favourite bumper sticker in Washington D.C. right now is one that says 'First Iraq, then France' -- Tom Brokaw
I hate bumper stickers, you can't sum anything up. All you do is paint yourself in some caricaturist corner. -- David Cross
I must confess, when I see anyone with an Obama 2012 bumper sticker, I recognize them as a threat to the gene pool. -- Allen West
Myself, I have never seen a bumper sticker saying " Hate if you Love Jesus ", but I sometimes wonder why not. It would be a good slogan for the religious Right. -- Simon Blackburn
A Pennsylvania woman convicted for shoplifting was sentenced to wear a badge that reads "Convicted Shoplifter." However, her lawyers hope to plea bargain down to a bumper sticker reading "I'd Rather Be Stealing!. -- Jimmy Fallon
I'm not all that big on rides. I sort of like bumper cars but I don't really go to Disneyland all that much unless if have nieces and nephews or people to take. -- Anjelica Huston
The Hillary team is driving around in a van. Sometimes people get those gag bumper stickers put on their van. Hillary has one on her van, and it says, 'If this van's rockin', I'm deleting emails.' -- David Letterman
If you are explaining, you're losing. It's a bumper sticker culture. People have to get it like that, and if they don't, if it takes three seconds to make them understand, you're off their radar screen. Three seconds to understand, or you lose. This is our problem. -- Lawrence Lessig
Anyone who has ever been privileged to direct a film also knows that, although it can be like trying to write 'War and Peace' in a bumper car in an amusement park, when you finally get it right, there are not many joys in life that can equal the feeling. -- Stanley Kubrick
There are no moderate Republicans left, with the exception of a few who would vote with us when it doesn't make any difference. It's the most rigid ideological party since before the Civil War. [...] The bumper sticker I'm going to have printed up for Democrats this year is, "We're not perfect, but they're nuts. -- Barney Frank
We're being sold a brand new idea of patriotism. It never occurred to me that patriotism had to be advertised. Patriotism is something you deeply felt. You didn't have to wear it on your lapel or show it in your window or on a bumper sticker. That kind of patriotism does not appeal to me at all. -- Sam Shepard
How I treat a brother or sister from day to day, how I react to the sin-scarred wino on the street, how I respond to interruptions from people I dislike, how I deal with normal people in their normal confusion on a normal day may be a better indication of my reverence for life than the antiabortion sticker on the bumper of my car. -- Brennan Manning
Sex gets people killed, put in jail, beaten up, bankrupted, and disgraced, to say nothing of ruined - personally, politically, and professionally. Looking for sex can lead to misfortune, and if you get lucky and find it, it can leave you maimed, infected, or dead. Other than that, it's swell: the great American pastime. ... You probably won't see it on a bumper sticker, but sex kills. -- Edna Buchanan
I don't much believe in bumper sticker characterizations of foreign policy. -- John Bolton
A bumper of good liquor will end a contest quicker than justice, judge, or vicar. -- Richard Brinsley Sheridan
My parents are apolitical - no bumper stickers, no yard signs. They don't talk about politics. -- Joel Burns
Whirlyball is only the most awesome sport on the planet! It's like bumper cars plus lacrosse meets basketball. -- St. Vincent
Supporting the troops has got to mean more than bumper stickers on pickup trucks, my friends. We need to give them what they need. -- Solomon Ortiz
During President George W. Bush's two terms, you couldn't drive far without seeing a particular bumper sticker: 'Dissent is the highest form of patriotism.' -- Monica Crowley
Because appearing to be fair is part of being fair, most mainstream news organizations discourage marching for causes, displaying political bumper stickers or giving cash to candidates. -- Bill Dedman
Enough Americans saw fit to give president Obama a second term. I don't think there will be many people keeping their Romney/Ryan bumper stickers on their cars. -- Henry Rollins
There are a lot of things that fit on a bumper sticker in terms of either liberty or equality or progress that when made more concrete just don't pan out. -- Laurence Tribe
I have a very dear family and very dear friends. They're my rock. These are people who knew me from the beginning, you know, as a loser in a 1972 Dodge Dart with the bumper literally duct-taped to the body. -- Mark Ruffalo
Just as I never liked bumper stickers - even though I do brake for animals, and if I had a kid, she would definitely be an honor student - I don't like the idea of expressing my views through social-media-controlled rainbow-or-anything-else-ification. -- Meghan Daum
I'm one of those who believe the bumper sticker: If you outlaw guns, only outlaws will have guns. The first people who are going to be in line to turn in their guns are law-abiding citizens. Criminals are going to be left with guns. -- Gary Johnson
We have an uncanny ability to make birds do what we want them to do. In Blood Simple there's a shot from the bumper of a car and it's going up this road and a huge flock of birds takes off at the perfect moment. -- Joel Coen
You want to know whether we're better off? I've got a little bumper sticker for you: Osama bin Laden is dead and General Motors is alive. Osama bin Laden is dead and General Motors is alive! Osama bin Laden is dead and General Motors is alive! -- Joe Biden
You don't change the world by hiding in the woods, wearing a hair shirt, or buying indulgences in the form of 'Save the Earth' bumper stickers. You do it by articulating a vision for the future and pursuing it with all the ingenuity humanity can muster. -- Alex Steffen
My tattoo is of a cannon in Vancouver that I got in a fleeting moment of stupidity maybe 14 years ago. A lot of people have really beautiful tattoos, and I get real tattoo envy. But then other people basically just treat them like bumper stickers for their bodies. -- Ryan Reynolds
President Obama's version of America is a divided one - pitting us against each other based on our income level, gender, and social status. His policies have failed! We are not better off than we were 4 years ago, and no rhetoric, bumper sticker, or campaign ad can change that. -- Mia Love
Cold Case Files' and similar shows do bang up business, which points to a certain thirst for details in the viewership, but it seems like all the news chat shows continue to force the myth that Americans can't stand detail and have no interest in an idea that can't fit on a bumper sticker. -- Hal Sparks
Kinect is such a great new entry into the field because it takes away one of the big barriers to little kids to playing a game, which is the controller. You can't hand a basic video game controller to a child and expect them to understand what a left bumper is and to click in the right stick. -- Tim Schafer
A popular bumper sticker post-9/11, and pretty faded these days, proclaims drivers of the cars to be 'Proud to be an American.' It really should say 'Lucky to be an American,' for I doubt very much that the drivers had much say in having been born here, and are not old enough to have participated in the drafting of the Constitution. -- Hooman Majd
People who are running for office mislead the American people by saying that there's a three-point plan or a bumper sticker kind of way of bringing down gasoline prices. The fact of the matter is that nobody can do that. The price of oil is set on the global economy. People who have looked at this closely and hard know that's the case. -- Ken Salazar
I think the inflation prospects for the U.S. over the next five or six, seven years, are quite serious. You cannot have a bumper crop in apples without the value or the price of each apple falling. The Fed has had the largest increase in the monetary base in the history of the U.S., from colonial times to the present, times ten. -- Arthur Laffer
You don't put bumper stickers on a Bentley. -- Kim Kardashian
Nothing makes me roll my eyes faster than a "Coexist" bumper sticker. -- Ayelet Waldman
My other car is a vehicle with a bumper sticker describing this car. -- Damien Fahey
I collect human skin. I keep it all on the bumper of my car. -- Jarod Kintz
When life hands you lemons say, "Lemons? What else have you got?" - bumper sticker -- Darynda Jones
You might be a redneck if your bumper sticker says, My other car is a combine. -- Jeff Foxworthy
It is obvious that the bumper sticker question "What would Jesus do?" will not always bring a popular response. -- Jeffrey R. Holland
Does that really work, converting someone with a bumper sticker? How weak of a mind do you have to have? -- Gregg Rogell
This is the age of the new tolerance and it is producing a bumper crop of anti-Christian and anti-American sentiment. -- Josh McDowell
Good places for aphorisms: in fortune cookies, on bumper stickers, and on banners flying over the Palace of Free Advice. -- Mason Cooley
If my mother were a bumper sticker, she would read THAT'S NOT APPROPRIATE. Taylor's mom would read WHY THE F*** NOT? -- Natasha Friend
[Jesus] said that they will know we are Christians - not by our bumper stickers and T-shirts - but by our love. -- Shane Claiborne
A prosthetic leg with a Willie Nelson bumper sticker washed ashore on the beach, which meant it was Florida. Then it got weird. -- Tim Dorsey
One thing I learned in sobriety is to stop being judgmental, to always be discerning. When I drive, that will be my bumper sticker. -- Kevin Sessums
California produces 40% of America's fresh fruits, vegetables and nuts - the kind you eat. We have had a bumper crop of the other variety, too. -- Ronald Reagan
My car would look better with a mustache for a bumper. Then pedestrians would know that I am a superior lover, just before I hit on them. -- Jarod Kintz
I saw a great bumper sticker that read: 'Do something that scares you every day.' That really stuck with me. I try to live like that. -- Janice Tanton
Hook up with us and see a quick return on your premiums.' I like it, Sammy. Think we can fit it on a bumper sticker? (Dean) -- Jeff Mariotte
God gave the seed, but he wants the fruits back. Pick the seeds up. Plant the best ones. He promised the rain. It will be a bumper harvest! -- Israelmore Ayivor
The world's bumper sticker reads: Life sucks, and then you die. Perhaps Christian bumper stickers should read: Life sucks, but then you find hope and you can't wait to die. -- Ted Dekker
I guess we were all guilty, in a way. We all shot him, we all skinned him, and we all got a complimentary bumper sticker that said, "I helped skin Bob." -- Jack Handey
Here's a bumper sticker I'd like to see... 'We are the Proud Parents of a Child who has resisted his teacher's attempts to bend him to the will of his corporate masters'. -- George Carlin
I had a bumper sticker on my car for a long time that said, "Kill your television." People helpfully pointed out that I was a total fraud because I was a television writer. -- George Meyer
The Confederate flag is one of those things that should only be seen on t-shirts, belt buckles and bumper stickers to help the rest of us identify the worst people in the world. -- John Oliver
Garcia wondered why people with JESUS stickers on their bumper always drove twenty miles per hour under the speed limit. If God was my co-pilot, he thought, I'd be doing a hundred and twenty. -- Carl Hiaasen

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