Richard Brinsley Sheridan quotes:

Won't you come into the garden? I would like my roses to see you.

My valor is certainly going, it is sneaking off! I feel it oozing out as it were, at the palms of my hands!

I open with a clock striking, to beget an awful attention in the audience - it also marks the time, which is four o clock in the morning, and saves a description of the rising sun, and a great deal about gilding the eastern hemisphere.

There is not a passion so strongly rooted in the human heart as envy.

Here 's to the maiden of bashful fifteen; Here 's to the widow of fifty; Here 's to the flaunting, extravagant queen, And here 's to the housewife that 's thrifty! Let the toast pass; Drink to the lass; I 'll warrant she 'll prove an excuse for the glass.

A bumper of good liquor will end a contest quicker than justice, judge, or vicar.

A bumper of good liquor Will end a contest quicker Than justice, judge or vicar.

Happiness is an exotic of celestial birth.

Tis safest in matrimony to begin with a little aversion.

He is indebted to his memory for his jests and to his imagination for his facts.

Fertilizer does no good in a heap, but a little spread around works miracles all over.

That old man dies prematurely whose memory records no benefits conferred. They only have lived long who have lived virtuously.

An aspersion upon my parts of speech!

Death's a debt; his mandamus binds all alike- no bail, no demurrer.

For if there is anything to one's praise, it is foolish vanity to be gratified at it, and if it is abuse - why one is always sure to hear of it from one damned good-natured friend or another!

The glorious uncertainty of the law was a thing well known and complained of, by all ignorant people, but all learned gentleman considered it as its greatest excellency.

You know it is not my interest to pay the principal, or my principal to pay the interest.

The most threatened group in human societies as in animal societies is the unmated male: the unmated male is more likely to wind up in prison or in an asylum or dead than his mated counterpart. He is less likely to be promoted at work and he is considered a poor credit risk.

The number of those who undergo the fatigue of judging for themselves is very small indeed.

Madam, a circulating library in a town is as an evergreen tree of diabolical knowledge; it blossoms through the year. And depend on it that they who are so fond of handling the leaves, will long for the fruit at last.

Conscience has no more to do with gallantry than it has with politics.

I'm called away by particular business - but I leave my character behind me.

I mean, the question actors most often get asked is how they can bear saying the same things over and over again, night after night, but God knows the answer to that is, don't we all anyway; might as well get paid for it.

There's no possibility of being witty without a little ill-nature - the malice of a good thing is the barb that makes it stick.

You write with ease, to show your breeding, But easy writing's vile hard reading.

I'll make my old clothes know who's master. I shall straightaway cashier the hunting-frock, and render my leather breeches incapable. My hair has been in training some time.

An unforgiving eye, and a damned disinheriting countenance!

A circulating library in a town is as an evergreen tree of diabolical knowledge.

There is nothing on earth so easy as to forget, if a person chooses to set about it. I'm sure I have as much forgot your poor, dear uncle, as if he had never existed; and I thought it my duty to do so.

My valor is certainly going, it is sneaking off! I feel it oozing out as it were, at the palms of my hands!"

Good reading makes for damn hard writing.

There needs no small degree of address to gain the reputation of benevolence without incurring the expense.

To smile at the jest which plants a thorn in another's breast is to become a principal in the mischief.

Never say more than is necessary.

I ne'er could any lustre see In eyes that would not look on me; I ne'er saw nectar on a lip But where my own did hope to sip.

Ay, ay, the best terms will grow obsolete: damns have had their day.

Our memories are independent of our wills.

My valour is certainly going! - it is sneaking off! - I feel it oozing out as it were at the palms of my hands!

He is the very pineapple of politeness.

Pity those who nature abuses; never those who abuse nature.

A tale of scandal is as fatal to the credit of a prudent lady as a fever is generally to those of the strongest constitutions. But there is a sort of puny, sickly reputation, that is always ailing, yet will wither the robuster characters of a hundred prudes.

No scandal about Queen Elizabeth, I hope?

Be just before you are generous

Those that vow the most are the least sincere.

The surest way to fail is not to determine to succeed.

I hate to see prudence clinging to the green suckers of youth; 'tis like ivy round a sapling, and spoils the growth of the tree.

When of a gossiping circle it was asked, "What are they doing?" The answer was, "Swapping lies.

A man may surely be allowed to take a glass of wine by his own fireside.

A wise woman will always let her husband have her way.

Remember that when you meet your antagonist, to do everything in a mild agreeable manner. Let your courage be keen, but, at the same time, as polished as your sword.

You write with ease to show your breeding, but easy writing's curst hard reading.

Do thou snatch treasures from my lips, and I'll take kingdoms back from thine.

'Tis safest in matrimony to begin with a little aversion.

A fluent tongue is the only thing a mother don't like her daughter to resemble her in.

Be just before you are generous.

Modesty is a quality in a lover more praised by the women than liked.

Certainly nothing is unnatural that is not physically impossible.

A life spent worthily should be measured by a nobler line,-by deeds, not years.

A man may think an untruth as well as speak one.

A practitioner in panegyric, or, to speak more plainly, a professor of the art of puffing.

A progeny of learning.

An apothecary should never be out of spirits.

An oyster may be crossed in love.

As there are three of us come on purpose for the game, you won't be so cantankerous as to spoil the party by sitting out.

Believe not each accusing tongue, As most weak persons do; But still believe that story wrong, Which ought not to be true!

Believe that story false that ought not to be true.

Easy writings curse is hard reading.

Easy writing's curst hard reading.

Egad, I think the interpreter is the hardest to be understood of the two!

Fame, the sovereign deity of proud ambition.

For in religion as in friendship, they who profess most are ever the least sincere.

Give them a corrupt House of Lords, give them a venal House of Commons, give they a tyrannical Prince, give them a truckling court, and let me have but an unfettered press. I will defy them to encroach a hair's breadth upon the liberties of England.

Had I a heart for falsehood framed, I ne'er could injure you.

Here is the whole set! a character dead at every word.

Here, my dear Lucy, hide these books. Quick, quick! Fling "Peregrine Pickle" under the toilette -throw "Roderick Random" into the closet -put "The Innocent Adultery" into "The Whole Duty of Man"; thrust "Lord Aimworth" under the sofa! cram "Ovid" behind the bolster; there -put "The Man of Feeling" into your pocket. Now for them.

Humanity always becomes a conqueror.

Humanity is composed but of two categories, the invalids and the nurses

I had rather follow you to your grave than see you owe your life to any but a regular-bred physician.

I leave my character behind me.

I loved him for himself alone.

I ne'er could any luster seeIn eyes that would not look on me.

I own the soft impeachment.

I was struck all on a heap.

I would by no means wish a daughter of mine to be a progeny of learning.

If I reprehend anything in this world, it is the use of my oracular tongue, and a nice derangement of epitaphs!

If it is abuse, - why one is always sure to hear of it from one damned goodnatured friend or another!

If Parliament were to consider the sporting with reputation of as much importance as sporting on manors, and pass an act for the preservation of fame as well as game, there are many who would thank them for the bill.

If the thought is slow to come, a glass of good wine encourages it; and when it does come, a glass of good wine rewards it.

Illiterate him, I say, quite from your memory.

I'm called away by particular business - but I leave my character behind me

In all cases of slander currency, whenever the forger of the lie is not to be found, the injured parties should have a right to come on any of the indorsers.

It is by women that nature writes on the hearts of men.

It is not my interest to pay the principal, nor my principle to pay the interest.

Justice-august and pure, the abstract idea of all that would be perfect in the spirits and the inspirations of men!-where the mind rises; where the heart expands; where the countenance is ever placid and benign; where her favorite attitude is to stoop to the unfortunate; to hear their cry and to help them; to rescue and relieve; to succor and save; majestic, from its mercy; venerable, from its Lutility; uplifted, without pride; firm without obduracy; beneficent in each preference; lovely, though in her frown!

Many a wretch has rid on a hurdle who has done less mischief than utterers of forged tales, coiners of scandal, and clippers of reputation.

Men seldom think deeply on subjects in which they have no choice of opinion: they are fearful of encountering obstacles to their faith--as in religion--and so are content with the surface.

Mr. Speaker. I said the honorable member was a liar it is true and I am sorry for it. The honorable member may place the punctuation where he pleases.

Nay, but Jack, such eyes! such eyes! so innocently wild! so bashfully irresolute! Not a glance but speaks and kindles some thought of love! Then, Jack, her cheeks! her cheeks, Jack! so deeply blushing at the insinuations of her tell-tale eyes! Then, Jack, her lips! O, Jack, lips smiling at their own discretion! and, if not smiling, more sweetly pouting - more lovely in sullenness! Then, Jack, her neck! O, Jack, Jack!

Nothing keeps me in such awe as perfect beauty; now, there is something consoling and encouraging in ugliness.

O Lord, Sir - when a heroine goes mad she always goes into white satin.

Our ancestors are very good kind of folks; but they are the last people I should choose to have a visiting acquaintance with.

Prudence, like experience, must be paid for.

Satires and lampoons on particular people circulate more by giving copies in confidence to the friends of the parties, than by printing them.

Self confidence is the ground stone of success

Sheer necessity,-the proper parent of an art so nearly allied to invention.

She's as headstrong as an allegory on the banks of the Nile.

Soft pity never leaves the gentle breast where love has been received a welcome guest.

Steal! to be sure they may; and, egad, serve your best thoughts as gypsies do stolen children,-disfigure them to make 'em pass for their own.

Tale-bearers are as bad as the tale-makers.

The heart that is conscious of its own integrity is ever slow to credit another´s treachery.

The newspapers! Sir, they are the most villainous - licentious -abominable - infernal - Not that I ever read them - No - I make it a rule never to look into a newspaper.

The quarrel is a very pretty quarrel as it stands - we should only spoil it by trying to explain it.

The Right Honourable gentleman is indebted to his memory for his jests, and to his imagination for his facts.

The silver ore of pure charity is an expensive article in the catalogue of a man's good qualities.

The surest way not to fail is to determine to succeed.

The throne we honour is the people's choice.

There are a set of malicious, prating, prudent gossips, both male and female, who murder characters to kill time; and will rob a young fellow of his good name before he has years to know the value of it.

There is no trusting appearances.

There never was a scandalous tale without some foundation.