Katie the Maid Quotes in


Katie the Maid Quotes:

  • Esther Smith: Oh, Katie, they were just little white lies.

    Katie the Maid: A lie's a lie. Dressin' it in white don't help it. And just why was I lying this time? Why must we have dinner an hour early?

    Esther Smith: Because Rose is expecting...

    Katie the Maid: Now don't go blaming your sister.

    Esther Smith: Blaming her? Why, we're doing this for her. You know Rose's problem. Warren Sheffield has been writing to her for six months without one word that even smells like a proposal.

    Katie the Maid: What's that got to do with having dinner an hour early?

    Esther Smith: Warren is telephoning Rose long-distance from New York at half-past six.

    Katie the Maid: Long-distance?

    Esther Smith: Yes, and if the whole family is sitting here drinking in every word, she may be loathe to say the things a girl's compelled to say to get a proposal out of a man. If that man, unfortunately, is Warren Sheffield.

    Katie the Maid: Personally, I wouldn't marry a man who proposed to me over an invention.

    Esther Smith: Well, we can't be too particular. While we love Rose, the brutal fact is that, well, she isn't getting any younger.

    Katie the Maid: There's the poor old maid now!

  • Agnes Smith: Katie, where's my cat?

    Katie the Maid: I don't know... a little while ago, she got in my way and I kicked her down the cellar steps. I could hear her spine hitting on every step.

    Agnes Smith: Oh, if you killed her, I'll kill you! I'll stab you to death in your sleep, then I'll tie your body to two wild horses until you're pulled apart.

    Katie the Maid: Oh, won't that be terrible, now? There's your cat.

  • Agnes Smith: I can't get hungry till it gets dark.

    Katie the Maid: Dinner's at five-thirty. You can eat blind-folded!

    Mrs. Anna Smith: We have to be out of the dining room by six-thirty. Warren Sheffield is telephoning Rose from New York. And Rose, if I were you, I wouldn't committ myself one way or another. After all...

    Rose Smith: Mama, for goodness sakes!

    Mrs. Anna Smith: After all, we know very little about him. Why, we haven't even met his folks.

    Rose Smith: It seems to me that one little phone call is causing an awful lot of excitement in this family!

    Mrs. Anna Smith: Besides, you're entirely too young and I don't think your father will allow it.

    Katie the Maid: Mrs. Smith, if I'm going to keep lying to your daughters, I'll have to ask for more money.

    Mrs. Anna Smith: Now, remember, not a word of this to your papa. You know how he plagues the girls about their beaus.

    Agnes Smith: Everybody knows but Papa?

    Grandpa: Your papa's not supposed to know. It's enough we're letting him work hard every day to support the whole flock of us. He can't have everything.

  • Mr. Alonzo Smith: Ah, corn beef and cabbage. Katie, I could smell that cabbage when I got off the trolley.

    Katie the Maid: Cabbage has a cabbage smell.

  • Grandpa: [moaning] Ohhhhhhh.

    Katie the Maid: What was that?

    Grandpa: Here are your sacks of flour.

    [Hand them to Tootie and Agnes]

    Grandpa: You couldn't get me out on a night like this for a million dollars!

    Agnes Smith: Did anyone here a noise just now?

    Grandpa: Did it sound like this?

    [moans again]

    Grandpa: Ohhhhhh?

    Agnes Smith: Uh-huh.

    Grandpa: [Shakes his head] I didn't hear it.

    Grandpa: If you wet the flour before you throw it, it makes it harder for the victim to remove it.

  • Katie the Maid: Mrs. Smith, who are these boys?

    Agnes Smith: It's me, Katie, it's Agnes!

    Katie the Maid: Saints preserve us, it is! You had me fooled!

    'Tootie' Smith: Mama, we fooled her!

    Mrs. Anna Smith: Well, if you can fool our Katie, you can fool anyone.

    Katie the Maid: Agnes, I thought you were a drunken ghost.

    Agnes Smith: But I am. Tootie's a horrible ghost, and I'm a terrible drunken ghost.

    'Tootie' Smith: She was murdered in a den of thieves, and I died of a broken heart. I've never even been buried because everyone's scared to come near me.

  • Katie the Maid: Would it start a minor revolution in this household if dinner was served an hour early today?

    Mrs. Anna Smith: Mr. Smith hates to eat early on a hot day.

    Katie the Maid: Eating early on a hot day gives you more time to digest your food before retiring. Besides, I'm due at my sister's at seven o'clock on a family matter.

    Mrs. Anna Smith: Is there something wrong with your sister?

    Katie the Maid: She's having trouble with her husband. Him bein' a man.

    Mrs. Anna Smith: Well, eating early is all right with me, but you'll have to explain it to Mr. Smith.

    Katie the Maid: Oh, he won't mind, seein' as how tonight's corn beef night.

  • Katie the Maid: Anybody want dessert?

    Mr. Alonzo Smith: Dessert? What happened to dinner?

    Katie the Maid: I didn't think anybody could eat meat on a hot day like this!

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