Dr. Lester Quotes in Being John Malkovich (1999)

Dr. Lester: She's got her doctorate in speech impedimentology from Case Western.

[During a job interview]

Dr. Lester: Which of these two letters comes first, this one or this one?

Craig Schwartz: The symbol on the left is not a letter, sir?

Dr. Lester: Damn, you're good. I was trying to trick you.

Dr. Lester: Any questions?

Craig Schwartz: Just one. Why are these ceilings so low?

Dr. Lester: Low overhead, my boy - we pass the savings on to you! But seriously, that'll all be covered in the orientation.

Dr. Lester: Don't toy with Floris, Schwartz.

Craig Schwartz: Oh, no.

Dr. Lester: If I was 80 years younger, I'd box your ears.

Craig Schwartz: I wasn't toying with her sir, I wouldn't - pardon me, how old are you, sir?

Dr. Lester: 105. Carrot juice, lots of it. I swear, sometimes it's not worth it. I piss orange. I have to piss sitting down like a goddamn girlie-girl every fifteen minutes.

Dr. Lester: Hello, Mr. Juarez.

Craig Schwartz: Dr. Lester, My name is Craig Schwartz, a small mixup with your secretary...

Dr. Lester: [into intercom] Security!

Dr. Lester: Floris, get Guinness on the phone.

Floris: Right away, Dr. Lester. Genghis Khan Capone.

Dr. Lester: My spunk is to you manna from heaven...

Dr. Lester: I've been very lonely in my isolated tower of indecipherable speech.

Dr. Lester: Ah to be a young man again, eh, Schwartz? "laughs" maybe then Floris would care for me.

Craig Schwartz: But the elderly have so much to offer, sir. they're our link with history.

Dr. Lester: I don't want to be your goddamn link, damn you.I want to feel Floris' naked thighs next to mine. I want my body to inspire lust in that beautiful complex women. I want her to shiver with a spasm of ecstasy, Schwartz, as I penetrate her...

Craig Schwartz: Dr. Lester, while I'm flattered you would share your feeling with me, perhaps the workplace is not the most suitable environment for this type of discussion.

Dr. Lester: All right, your right. All right I tell you what: Meet me after work today at Jerry's juiceteria on lex, and I'll spill my goddamn guts for you.