Charlie Brown Quotes in Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (2003)

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Charlie Brown Quotes:

  • Proprietor: [in Japanese; subtitled] You have to say, "Yes, yes, yes" to any selfish demands they make.

    Charlie Brown: [in Japanese] They demand ridiculous things.

    Proprietor: Shut up! Do you know what would happen if they heard you?

    Charlie Brown: What's gonna happen?

    Proprietor: Did you hear about the Tanaka clan? You're gonna get your head cut off.

    Charlie Brown: No, I don't want that.

  • Little Red-Haired Girl: Oh, hi, Charlie Brown.

    Charlie Brown: You remembered my name?

    Little Red-Haired Girl: Of course I did.

    Charlie Brown: Before you leave, there's something I really need to know. Why, out of all the kids in our class, would you want to be partners with me?

    Little Red-Haired Girl: That's easy. It's because I've seen the type of person you are.

    Charlie Brown: An insecure, wishy-washy failure?

    Little Red-Haired Girl: That's not who you are at all. I like the compassion you showed for your sister at the talent show. The honesty you had at the assembly. And at the dance, you were brave yet funny. And what you did for me, doing the book report while I was away, was so sweet of you. So when I look at you, I don't see a failure at all. You have all the qualities I admire.

    [bus horn honks]

    Little Red-Haired Girl: Sorry, I have to go now.

    Charlie Brown: Wait.

    [gives her her pencil]

    Charlie Brown: I think this belongs to you.

    Little Red-Haired Girl: Oh, thank you! I've been looking everywhere for this!

    [gets on the bus]

    Little Red-Haired Girl: I'll write to you, pen pal.

  • Charlie Brown: You've got to help me, Linus! I'm not sure I can handle being partners with the Little Red-Haired Girl! How will I support her? I can't afford a mortgage! What if I'm put into escrow?

    Linus: Charlie Brown, you're the only person I know who can turn a book report into a lifelong commitment.

  • Little Kid: [stammering] What are you in for?

    [he scoots away]

    Charlie Brown: Have you ever had that feeling when you can't stop smiling?

    Little Kid: Huh?

    Charlie Brown: Your heart pounds inside your chest? You try to stand, but your knees become weak?

    [he falls; the little kid gasps]

    Charlie Brown: And then that Little Red-Haired Girl glances at you

    [he starts to float up, surrounded by hearts]

    Little Kid: Whoa!

    Charlie Brown: And all of life's possibilities become so clear. And then you realize...

    [he falls back into the chair]

    Little Kid: [flies out of his chair and falls on the scale] Ah!

    Charlie Brown: ...she has no idea you're alive.

    Nurse: Wah wah wah?

    Charlie Brown: Why am I here?

    [he sighs]

    Charlie Brown: Because I just came down with a serious case of inadequacy.

  • Charlie Brown: Whenever I feel really alone, I just sit and stare into the night sky. I've always thought that one of those stars was *my* star, and at moments like this, I know that *my* star will always be there for me. Like a comfortable voice saying, "Don't give up, kid."

    [the star Charlie Brown is looking at literally falls from the sky]

  • Charlie Brown: A dog doesn't try to give advice, or judge you; they just love you for who you are. It's nice to have someone who will just sit and listen to you.

    Snoopy: Zzzzzzz...

    Charlie Brown: Man's best friend.

  • Lucy van Pelt: Let me let you in on a little secret, Charlie Brown. If you really want to impress people, you need to show them you're a winner.

    Charlie Brown: A winner? Me? Lucy, you may be on to something!

    Lucy van Pelt: Of course, when I say "you", you know I don't mean "you personally".

  • Lucy van Pelt: Oh, Charlie Brown, I'll hold the football and you kick it.

    Charlie Brown: You *say* you'll hold it, but what you really mean is you'll pull it away and I'll land flat on my back and I'll kill myself.

    Lucy van Pelt: But I feel I have really come to know you. I now understand that you are kind, compassionate, brave, and funny. No one would pull a football away from someone with all *those* qualities.

    Charlie Brown: [to himself] She's right. I would never pull a football away from someone with all *those* qualities. I am gonna kick this ball all the way to the moon.

    [He starts running up and, as expected, Lucy pulls the football away from him]

    Charlie Brown: AAUGH!

    [Wham!]

    Lucy van Pelt: And gullible. I forgot to mention gullible.

  • Charlie Brown: I can't believe I'm about to talk to the Little Red-Haired Girl.

    [to Snoopy]

    Charlie Brown: It's moments like this when you need your faithful friend.

    [Charlie Brown walks up to the door, but hesitates and walks away. Snoopy goes after him and pushes him back to the doorway]

    Charlie Brown: Yup. If there's one person you want at your side at a time like this, it's your loyal dog. Uhh... Uhhh... Ohhh.

    [as he is about to ring a doorbell, he sighs, then Snoopy also sighs, then Snoopy rings the doorbell]

    Charlie Brown: Aaaahhhhh!

    Little Red-Haired Girl: [opening her front door to find no one here] Hello? Hello? Hmm.

    Charlie Brown: [hiding in a tree bush] She said, "Hello!"

    Snoopy: Ehh...

  • Sally Brown: It's the last day of school! Well, big brother, can you believe it? My last day of school. No more reading, writing, arithmetic! No more learning forever!

    Charlie Brown: What are you talking about? This is just the start of summer vacation. You have eight more years of grammar school, four more years of high school, plus four more years of college.

    Sally Brown: [muttering while trying to do the math] Carry the one, over the extra one...

    [out loud]

    Sally Brown: That gives us 36 more years of school! I'll be bald and wrinkly by then!

  • Charlie Brown: [to the Little Red-Haired Girl] Hi, I'm Brown Charlie! I mean, Barney Clown!

  • Charlie Brown: Before I begin, I'd like to thank all of you for your support. You have all been so kind. It is not often that I get this sort of recognition. But... um, there's been a mistake. This is not my test.

    Lucy van Pelt: [wearing a Charlie Brown shirt] HA! I knew it!

    [sits down covering her shirt]

  • Charlie Brown: [thinking] I just hope this new kid has never heard of me. He would know nothing of my past imperfections. It's not often you get the opportunity to start over with a clean slate. THis time things will be different.

    [Charlie Brown falls down a piece of wood of a fence, then the whole fence collapsed down]

    All: He did it!

    [They all run away]

  • [as Charlie Brown takes a peek through his shades, Sally opens his shades]

    Sally Brown: What are you looking at, big brother?

    Charlie Brown: [Closing down his shades] Are you crazy?

    Sally Brown: [as they are opening up and closing down his shades over and over again] Hey! I want to see!

    Charlie Brown: Wooaah!

    Sally Brown: Ohhh, you're in love.

  • Charlie Brown: The whole world seems to be conspiring against me. I'm just asking for a little help for once in my life.

  • Lucy van Pelt: [to Charlie Brown] Girls want someone with proven success. Have you won any awards? Like a Congressional Medal of Honor? Or a Nobel Peace Prize?

    Charlie Brown: Uh...

    Lucy van Pelt: What are your real estate holdings? Do you have a diversified portfolio?

  • Linus: You know, Charlie Brown, if you like her so much, why not just walk up to her and introduce yourself?

    Charlie Brown: After the complete fool I made out of myself last night? Yeah, and why don't I just fly to the moon?

  • Charlie Brown: You know, I could really use a dance partner.

    Sally Brown: [watching TV] Yeah, good luck with that.

  • Charlie Brown: These cupcakes don't look half-bad, if I do say so myself. This time, I've come totally prepared. I couldn't have done it without you, Snoopy. The old Charlie Brown would still be lying in bed with a stomachache.

    [He realizes that Snoopy ate all the cupcakes]

    Charlie Brown: Good grief.

  • [when he chooses a book-report partner name out of the bowl and reads it]

    Charlie Brown: [in his thoughts, imagining] Little Red-Haired Girl. My lucky day! This changes everything. She will see the new me. And together, we'll win the gold star! After that, anything is possible. We could be the first kids to land on the moon!

    Charlie Brown: [imagining himself as an astronaut] One small step for kids, one giant leap for Charlie Brown!

    [suddenly, Miss Othmar says something and we see Charlie wearing the bowl as an astronaut helmet, the students laughing as he looks nervously at them]

  • [from trailer]

    [Charlie Brown stands up for himself until the music stops]

    Charlie Brown: Huh?

    [Snoopy pops in and waves at the audience as the theme song starts]

    Charlie Brown: Hey!

    Snoopy: Hehehe.

    Charlie Brown: Snoopy!

    [Snoopy walks away, then as Charlie Brown is about to say something in the audience, Snoopy jumps up in front of him]

    Snoopy: Hahaha!

    [He runs away, then he appeared on the right side]

    Snoopy: Hehe!

    [Snoopy spins around Charlie Brown, making him dizzy]

    Charlie Brown: Woah, woah, woah! Woah.

    Snoopy: Hahahahahahahaha!

    Charlie Brown: Good grief.

  • Sally Brown: [leading a guided tour of Charlie Brown's house] And this is where it all began. As a youth, he passed many hours just sitting in that chair, keeping his deep thoughts to himself. And here we have his early kites, used in many aerodynamic studies. If we are lucky, we will see him in his natural habitat. And this is the actual bed where he lies and ponders life's greatest questions.

    Charlie Brown: [waking up] Hey! What are you doing?

    Sally Brown: I'm trying to cash in on your celebrity.

  • [from trailer]

    [Charlie Brown, carrying two buckets of popcorn, is blocking the screen]

    Charlie Brown: Excuse me. Sorry.

    Lucy van Pelt: Augh! Charlie Brown, you blockhead!

    Charlie Brown: Wooah!

    [He tries to get the popcorn bucket, but falls, then the other popcorn bucket fell inside his head. They all laugh, and Charlie Brown tries to take the popcorn bucket out of his head, but could not]

    Charlie Brown: [sighs] Good grief.

  • Charlie Brown: It's going to be a long winter.

  • Charlie Brown: [noticing Sally surrounded by merchandise themed after his shirt] What are you up to *now*?

    Sally Brown: Now that you're a big celebrity, I have to move fast. The fame that comes with intellectual superiority can be very fleeting. You have to cash in while you can.

  • Linus: It's my turn for show and tell today This is a model of the same plane flown by Manfred von Richthofen.

    Charlie Brown: Who?

    Linus: The Red Baron. The most famous aviator during the Great War.

    Charlie Brown: It's not real is it?

  • [Linus and Charlie Brown are at the iconic brick wall]

    Linus: Charlie Brown, where have you been? It's the first day of summer. You should be down there having fun with everyone else.

    Charlie Brown: I can't stop thinking about it, Linus. After all the humiliating disasters she witnessed this year, why would she choose me? Was she feeling sorry for me? I don't want her to choose me just because she was feeling sorry for me. I have slightly more dignity than that.

    Linus: Charlie Brown, it might be time to consider the wild possibility that you're a good person and that people like you. But you know, you'll never really know the answer, unless...

    Charlie Brown: I just go up to talk to her! I should have listened to you all along!

  • Charlie Brown: You can't come to school Snoopy. Now be a good dog and go home.

  • Sally Brown: Hey! What's going on? Turn it down! Turn it down in there!

    [growls]

    SnoopySally Brown: Huh?

    Charlie Brown: She likes to dance.

    Sally Brown: Ugh!

  • Charlie Brown: She has a pretty face and pretty faces make me nervous.

    Lucy van Pelt: Pretty face? Pretty face? I have a pretty face! How come my face doesn't make you nervous? How come you can talk to me Charlie Brown?

    Charlie Brown: I just need to know the secret to winning her heart.

  • Charlie Brown: Stupid kite-eating tree! Good grief.

  • Charlie Brown: I don't care what Lucy says. I may have had troubles in the past, flying a kite. I may have never won a baseball game. But, it's not for the lack of trying!

  • Charlie Brown: My pitching has to improve if I come out here to my trusty mound every day. Charlie Brown is not a quitter!

  • Lucy van Pelt: Charlie Brown, what brings you out here so late in the day?

    Charlie Brown: [sigh] I need your advice on girls, Lucy. You're a girl, right? Let's just say there's this girl I'd like to impress. But, she's something and I'm nothing. If I were something and she was nothing, I could talk to her. Or, if she was nothing and I was nothing, I could talk to her! But, she's something and I'm nothing. So I just can't talk to her.

  • Franklin: I've never made a bed in my life. Do I have directions? By the way, it's a little chilly in here. Where's the thermostat?

    Charlie Brown: Hey! We're supposed to be roughing it. There's no thermostat in a tent!

  • Charlie Brown: Why can't I have a normal dog like everybody else?

  • Patricia "Peppermint Patty" Reichardt: [to Charlie Brown, about his registration form] Hey Chuck. Give us a hint. What did you write?

    Charlie Brown: Well, I'm not quite sure. It's kind of personal, you know.

    Patricia "Peppermint Patty" Reichardt: [Chucks "Chuck" playfully in the arm] Oh, come on, Chuck. We're close friends, you know.

    Charlie Brown: [Thinks for a second] Well, okay.

    [Reads from his paper]

    Charlie Brown: I decided to come to camp, because I've never been much of a person. I thought maybe coming to camp would help me grow up, and maybe make me into a leader. I could use leadership qualities.

    Patricia "Peppermint Patty" Reichardt: You could say that again, Chuck. You couldn't lead a dog on a leash.

  • Linus Van Pelt: Are we dead?

    Lucy Van Pelt: Thanks to old Charlie Brown.

    Sally Brown: I'm not dead.

    Patricia "Peppermint Patty" Reichardt: Of course you're not dead!

    Lucy Van Pelt: No thanks to old Charlie Brown!

    Charlie Brown: All right, all right, let's go to the river!

  • Franklin: What's 0500? Noon time?

    Charlie Brown: Nope, it's 5 in the morning.

    Franklin: 5 in the morning? I don't get up at 5 in the morning! Maybe I should resign.

  • [last lines]

    Charlie Brown: Well, lots of things have happened to me, and I'm glad I did what I did. You know, I was never sure how I'd be able to stand up under pressure and how I'd make decisions, and I feel good about myself for the first time in my life! I think now that dumb things won't happen to me anymore. I feel like I'm more in control!

    [bus door closes and bus takes off]

    Charlie Brown: HEY! DON'T FORGET - ME!

    [sighs]

    Charlie Brown: Snoopy, the bus took off, and they forgot me! Can you give me a lift?

  • Charlie Brown: [he and the rest of the gang are stuck on top of a water wheel while everybody else shouts for help] Well, I'm the leader, so I guess it's up to me to climb down and free this wheel.

  • [the kids take a wrong turn to a channel and see a sign: "Danger, Blasting on Tuesdays and Thursdays"]

    Charlie Brown: That's funny. Did you see that sign?

    Patricia "Peppermint Patty" Reichardt: Hey, Chuck, did you see that sign? What day is this?

    Charlie Brown: That's right, today is Tuesday!

    [the kids pass by a group of bulldozers and tractors and see another sign: "Danger, Blasting on Tuesdays and Thursdays, 10 am"]

    Patricia "Peppermint Patty" Reichardt: Chuck, did you see that sign? What time is it, Chuck?

    Charlie Brown: [checks his watch] It's almost...

    [a huge explosion occurs and a bunch of rocks fall on the screaming kids as the channel goes wavy separating the kids from Snoopy and Woodstock]

    Charlie Brown: ...10 AM!

    [the rocks stop falling and the channel goes calm again]

    Patricia "Peppermint Patty" Reichardt: [angrily points at Charlie Brown] Okay, Chuck! *Another* fine mess you've gotten us into! Look at that! The channel is all blocked!

    Lucy Van Pelt: Yeah, just like his head!

    [Charlie Brown nervously blushes]

  • Charlie Brown: I'm depressed, Linus. I need an encouraging word to cheer me up.

    Linus: Happiness lies in our destiny like a cloudless sky before the storms of tomorrow destroy the dreams of yesterday and last week.

    Charlie Brown: I think that blanket is doing something to you.

  • Patricia "Peppermint Patty" Reichardt: What do you think love is, Chuck?

    Charlie Brown: Well, years ago, my dad owned a black 1934 two-door sedan.

    Patricia "Peppermint Patty" Reichardt: What's that got to do with love?

    Charlie Brown: Well, this is what he told me: there was this really cute girl, see? She used to go for rides with him in his car. And whenever he'd call for her, he would always hold open the car door for her. After she got in and he had closed the door, he'd walk around the back of the car to the driver's side, but before he could get there, she would reach over and press the button, locking him out. Then she'd just sit there and wrinkle her nose and grin at him. That's what I think love is.

    Patricia "Peppermint Patty" Reichardt: [perplexed] Sometimes I wonder about you, Chuck.

  • Patricia "Peppermint Patty" Reichardt: Does your kind ever think about love, Chuck?

    Charlie Brown: What do you mean, *my* kind?

    Patricia "Peppermint Patty" Reichardt: I'm sorry, I didn't mean to put it that way. No offense. I apologize.

    [She holds out her hand]

    Patricia "Peppermint Patty" Reichardt: Friends?

    [They shake hands]

    Patricia "Peppermint Patty" Reichardt: [swooningly] You touched my hand, Chuck.

  • [first lines]

    [Charlie Brown picks up a rock from the beach, and throws it into the water]

    Linus: Nice going, Charlie Brown. It took that rock 4,000 years to get to shore, and now you've thrown it back.

    Charlie Brown: Everything I do makes me feel guilty.

  • Charlie Brown: If I don't find out what happened to Snoop, I think I'll go out of my mind!

    Linus: If you'll calm down for a minute, Charlie Brown, I may able to conduct a little private investigation.

    Charlie Brown: Just what I need, a blanket-carrying Sherlock Holmes!

  • [last lines]

    Linus: [outraged by a note handed out by Snoopy] Look at this, Charlie Brown!

    Charlie Brown: [reading it] "To Linus Van Pelt: I expect my croquet set and chess set returned forthwith, in good order, and within five days, or the matter will be turned over to my attorney."

    Schroeder: [outraged over his own note from Snoopy] And mine says... he wants the record collection back!

    Charlie Brown: [reading his own letter] And mine says... that since he gave me nothing, I owe him nothing!

    [glares at Snoopy]

    Lucy: That does it, Charlie Brown! He's your dog, and you're welcome to him!

    [everyone walks out on Charlie Brown, Snoopy, and Woodstock; Charlie, annoyed at Snoopy, follows suit]

  • Charlie Brown: [about Snoopy, bitter] What an independent dog. He comes and goes as he pleases, but I have to stay home and fix his supper.

  • [Charlie Brown accidentally cuts his finger on a can opener while trying to open a can of dog food for Snoopy. Charlie Brown then takes it out to Snoopy's doghouse]

    Charlie Brown: [to Snoopy, bitter] All right, it's supper time. Come and get your supper.

    [Snoopy notices his chow, while Charlie Brown holds up a bandaged thumb, which he had accidentally cut]

    Charlie Brown: Do you see this finger? I cut it opening a can of stupid dog food for your stupid supper. I hope you appreciate it. Besides that, it wasn't a finger; it was my THUMB!

    [Charlie Brown then points down to order his dog off the roof of his dog house; Snoopy gets down]

    Charlie Brown: You've been acting awfully independent lately.

    [Snoopy ignores him]

    Charlie Brown: Don't forget that I'm the one who feeds you. I'm the one who takes care of you.

    [Snoopy still ignores him]

    Charlie Brown: Look at me when I'm talking to you!

    [Snoopy looks at him]

    Charlie Brown: Without me, you'd be nothing! Everything you have, you have because of me. Even that collar around your neck. Why, I remember the day I went out and bought that collar with money I have worked for and have saved and...

    [Snoopy removes his collar; Charlie Brown walks off in a huff]

    Charlie Brown: I hate it when he does that.

  • Charlie Brown: You know what I need? I need more hellos.

  • Linus: [Linus found out the reason why Snoopy ran away] Are you ready for a shock?

    [Charlie Brown faints]

    Linus: He wasn't ready for a shock.

    [Charlie Brown gets back up]

    Linus: How can I tell you something that will shock you if you pass out before I can tell you?

    Charlie Brown: I'm sorry; I've been hyperventilating a lot lately...

  • Peppermint Patty: [Charlie Brown nibbles a bit on his eraser] Don't chew on your eraser, Chuck. It bugs me.

    [Charlie Brown drums his fingers on the desk]

    Peppermint Patty: Stop drumming your fingers on the desk, Chuck. That grosses me out.

    [Charlie Brown sighs]

    Peppermint Patty: And don't hassle me with your sighs, Chuck.

    [Charlie Brown breathes through his mouth and licks his fingers while turning a page]

    Peppermint Patty: Don't breathe through your mouth, Chuck. Don't lick your fingers when you turn the pages, Chuck.

    [Charlie Brown is starting to get angry]

    Peppermint Patty: And don't scrap your feet on the desk.

    Charlie Brown: [shouting - finally had enough - his shouting knocks Peppermint Patty off her seat] WILL YOU STOP CRITICIZING ME?

  • Charlie Brown: Good bye, everybody! Take care of the old ball field, Schroeder, I'm going to miss it.

    Sally: The last time you went away, big brother, your team won three games in a row.

  • Teacher: How many times does 25 go into 75?

    Peppermint Patty: I'm awake! I'm awake! The answer is 12!

    Teacher: No, that is not correct.

    Peppermint Patty: The answer is 6!

    Charlie Brown: 3!

    Teacher: 3 is correct.

    Peppermint Patty: You contradicted me, Chuck! You made a fool out of me in front of the whole class.

    Charlie Brown: Well 6 was the wrong answer. I had to say 3.

    Peppermint Patty: You don't like me do you, Chuck?

  • Peppermint Patty: False! Why did you put down false, Chuck? The answer is true, Chuck! What's true is true! Put down true, Chuck, or I'll never speak to you again.

    Teacher: Charlie Brown?

    Charlie Brown: Ma'am?

    Teacher: Is your partner giving you the answers?

    Charlie Brown: Oh no, ma'am. She's not giving me the answers. Forcing, maybe, but not giving.

  • Linus: [Violette runs and accidentally knocks the candle, setting the chateau on fire] Aaugh!

    [Linus grabs Violette and runs to the window]

    Linus: Help! Help, help! Help! Charlie Brown, Charlie Brown! Help, please! Help, help, help! Charlie Brown! Help! Help! Help, help!

    [Charlie Brown wakes up]

    Linus: Charlie Brown, Charlie Brown! Help! Help! Fire! Charlie Brown! Help, help! Fire!

    Charlie Brown: Help! Help!

    Linus: Help! Help!

    The Baron: Au secours! Au secours!

    Charlie Brown: [Charlie runs] Fire! Help! Fire!

    The Baron: Au secours! Au secours!

    Charlie Brown: Fire, help! Fire! Help! Help! Fire!

    [runs to the cafe for Snoopy and Woodstock]

    Charlie Brown: Help! Fire at the chateau! Fire, fire! Help! Fire!

    [Snoopy and Woodstock opens the door]

    Charlie Brown: The chateau! Fire, help! Help! Help!

    [heads to Pierre's house as Snoopy and Woodstock runs to the shed to get the hose]

    Charlie Brown: Help, help! Help! Fire at the chateau! Fire, fire! Help!

    [runs up to Pierre's house]

    Charlie Brown: Fire, fire! Help! Fire! The chateau! Fire, fire! Help! The chateau! Fire, fire, fire!

    [Pierre, Marcie and Peppermint Patty come out]

    Charlie Brown: Somebody, help! The chateau is on fire! Somebody save the chateau! Fire, fire!

    [runs off]

    Pierre: [to Patty and Marcie] I must call the pompier!

    [Marcie and Peppermint Patty runs off]

  • Charlie BrownPeppermint PattyMarcie: Jump, Linus, jump!

    Pierre: [runs up] The pompier are on the way, is Linus safe?

    Charlie BrownPeppermint PattyMarcie: Jump, jump! Jump Linus, jump!

    Linus: [to Violette] Jump? Are they crazy?

  • British ticket agent: Passport, please.

    Charlie Brown: Y-Yes, sir. We're just passing through. We're on our way to France, sir. I have nothing to declare, sir. I throw myself at the mercy of the court!

    Linus: We've only been two minutes and already he's embarrassing us.

  • Peppermint Patty: If you know an answer, Chuck, and I don't, you tell me what it is. If I know an answer and you don't, I'll tell you what it is.

    Charlie Brown: What happens if neither of us knows the answer?

    Peppermint Patty: We'll punt!

  • Charlie Brown: I'm worried about the Baron. Pierre said that he was a very mean man.

  • Charlie Brown: I don't have any idea what you're talking about, all I know is we had a terrible time. There was no one there to meet us, we got caught in the rain, the lightning scared us half to death, and we spent the night sleeping at the stable at the chateau.

  • [Charlie Brown & Co. are at an English restaurant, waited upon by a waiter with a thick Cockney accent]

    Waiter: All right Guv'nor, you ready to order?

    Charlie Brown: Can you help us with the menu?

    Waiter: For the gentlemen, I recommend the beef & kidney pie. The shepherds pie's rather nice for the ladies. A cheddar & pickle sandwich is rather toppo. What'll be your pleasure, mate?

    Charlie Brown: What is...

    [to Marcie]

    Charlie Brown: What did he say?

    Marcie: Perhaps I should have studied *English*, not French.

  • Charlie Brown: [pounding on the chateau's door in a horrible lightning storm] I can't believe it! There's no one home! Why would they invite us clear over here, and then not be home?

  • Pierre: Nobody go to the Chateau of the Bad Neighbor, the Baron is recluse and hates everybody! He do not allow visitors.

    Charlie Brown: Then why did they invite us? See? I got a letter from V. Honfleur, she invited us!

    Pierre: Violette? She's a ward of the Baron's, if she invited you, the Baron does not know about it. The Baron do not invite anyone. The Baron is a very violent person. He hates everybody.

    Linus: That doesn't make sense. Why did she invite you, Charlie Brown?

  • [at the spelling bee]

    Charlie Brown: Fussbudget, F-U-S-S-B-U-D-G-E-T, Fussbudget.

    [the Peanuts gang watching the spelling bee on TV]

    Lucy Van Pelt: Hey! How'd he know that word?

  • Linus Van Pelt: Well, I can understand how you feel. You worked hard, studying for the spelling bee, and I suppose you feel you let everyone down, and you made a fool of yourself and everything. But did you notice something, Charlie Brown?

    Charlie Brown: What's that?

    Linus Van Pelt: The world didn't come to an end.

  • Charlie Brown: [thinking] Well, we lost the first game of the season again. I know it shouldn't bother me, but it does. We always seem to lose the first game of the season and the last game of the season.

    [pause, then yells to the sky]

    Charlie Brown: And all those stupid games in between!

  • Charlie Brown: I'm dying, and all I hear are insults!

  • [first lines]

    Lucy Van Pelt: Aren't the clouds beautiful? They look like big balls of cotton. I could just lie here all day and watch them drift by. If you use your imagination, you can see lots of things in the cloud's formations. What do you think you see, Linus?

    Linus Van Pelt: Well, those clouds up there look to me look like the map of the British Honduras on the Caribbean.

    [points up]

    Linus Van Pelt: That cloud up there looks a little like the profile of Thomas Eakins, the famous painter and sculptor. And that group of clouds over there...

    [points]

    Linus Van Pelt: ...gives me the impression of the Stoning of Stephen. I can see the Apostle Paul standing there to one side.

    Lucy Van Pelt: Uh huh. That's very good. What do you see in the clouds, Charlie Brown?

    Charlie Brown: Well... I was going to say I saw a duckie and a horsie, but I changed my mind.

  • Linus Van Pelt: You know, Charlie Brown, they say we learn more from losing than from winning.

    Charlie Brown: Then that must make me the smartest person in the world.

  • Linus Van Pelt: Life is difficult, isn't it, Charlie Brown?

    Charlie Brown: Yes, it is. But I've developed a new philosophy. I only dread one day at a time.

  • Linus Van Pelt: Here, run over to the drinking fountain and soak this handkerchief in cold water.

    [Lucy skeptically examines the handkerchief]

    Lucy Van Pelt: You're kidding. With a head like Charlie Brown's, you'll need a bedsheet.

    Charlie Brown: I'm dying! And all I hear are insults!

  • Charlie Brown: This pitcher's mound is covered with dandelions!

    Frieda: Don't touch them Charlie Brown! Don't you dare hurt all those innocent dandelions! They're beautiful! Don't you dare cut them down!

    Lucy Van Pelt: Besides... you may not know this, but you look kind of cute standing there surrounded by dandelions.

    Charlie Brown: I don't want to look cute!

  • Charlie Brown: I've never gone through anything like that in my life. I never knew I could be so stupid. I never knew I had so many faults. I never felt so completely miserable.

    Lucy Van Pelt: Wait until you get my bill.

  • Charlie Brown: [At the bus stop departing for the national spelling bee] This whole thing makes me feel as though I'm being drafted.

  • Schroeder: Alright, Charlie Brown, let's get our signals straight. One finger will mean the high straight ball, and two fingers will mean the low straight ball.

    Charlie Brown: What about my curveball? And my slider? And my knuckleball? And my sidearm? And my submarine pitch?

    Schroeder: One finger will mean the high straight ball, and two fingers will mean the low straight ball.

    [Charlie Brown grimaces]

  • Charlie Brown: Why can't I have an ordinary dog like everyone else?

  • Linus Van Pelt: You look like you've been through shock treatment or something.

    Charlie Brown: What's more shocking than having your faults projected on a screen?

  • Charlie Brown: I think these psychiatrist visits are gonna bankrupt me.

  • Charlie Brown: [after he refuses Lucy's suggestion to pitch a bean ball, and the whole team gathers at the mound talking over one another about morality and other things] We never win any ball games, but we sure have some interesting discussions.

Browse more character quotes from Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (2003)

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