Mr. Walters Quotes in 21 Jump Street (2012)

Mr. Walters: I need me some Doug McQuaid.

Mr. Walters: That's my quesadilla!

Mr. Walters: You shot me in the dick. Oh, my god! It definitely came out my asshole.

Schmidt, Jenko: Yes. You are under arrest, you have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you. Do you understand these rights as they have been read to you? Fuck you, bitch!

Schmidt: Yes, yes, We did it, man.

Jenko: God, I feel so good.

Schmidt: [after Mr. Walters mimicked him mockingly] I don't sound like that.

Mr. Walters: Eric! Close your eyes and tell me who's talking!

[makes a whining baby sound]

Eric Molson: [eyes closed] Ugh, Schmidt bein' a little bitch.

Mr. Walters: Hey, guess what. I'm Eric's bitch!

Eric Molson: No you're not.

Mr. Walters: Yes I am! You own this ass!

[post credits scene]

Mr. Walters: Eric! Eric, are you awake?

Eric Molson: No!

Mr. Walters: I'm late!

[Eric is seen with a sad and miserable look on his face while moving his lips in horror. Cut to Columbia Pictures ending logo with the sound of a prison cell closing in the background]

Schmidt: Mr. Walters, I should apologize for...

Mr. Walters: ...for shooting my penis off? Don't sweat it, brother. I'm liberated. Totally. You know they gave me a vagina. It's awesome. You guys wanna see it?

Jenko, Schmidt: No, no, no, no!

Mr. Walters: Eric's seen it. Eric's been all up in that shit. Ain't that right, Eric?

Eric Molson: You guys gotta get me the fuck out of here.