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I'm no one's lap dog, you can't put me on a leash. -- John Lydon
There's no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap. -- Kevin James
Winter lingered so long in the lap of Spring that it occasioned a great deal of talk. -- Bill Nye
Our lives are not in the lap of the gods, but in the lap of our cooks. -- Lin Yutang
My uncle's dying wish - he wanted me on his lap. He was in the electric chair. -- Rodney Dangerfield
I think I'm being friendly with someone and I'll sit in their lap. They think I'm flirting with them. -- Kylie Minogue
Long stormy spring-time, wet contentious April, winter chilling the lap of very May; but at length the season of summer does come. -- Thomas Carlyle
If a dog jumps into your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. -- Alfred North Whitehead
Why can't we build orphanages next to homes for the elderly? If someone were sitting in a rocker, it wouldn't be long before a kid will be in his lap. -- Cloris Leachman
Great comforts do, indeed, bear witness to the truth of thy grace, but not to the degree of it; the weak child is oftener in the lap than the strong one. -- William Gurnall
Whoever will be free must make himself free. Freedom is no fairy gift to fall into a man's lap. What is freedom? To have the will to be responsible for one's self. -- Max Stirner
Just as a mother finds pleasure in taking her little child on her lap, there to feed and caress him, in like manner our loving God shows His fondness for His beloved souls who have given themselves entirely to Him and have placed all their hope in His goodness. -- Alphonsus Liguori
Assuredly, the size of (Cadel) Evans' heart will come to be compared to Phar Lap. -- Paul Ramadge
And ever against eating cares Lap me in soft Lydian airs, Married to immortal verse -- John Milton
Lap-dogs and blood-hounds enjoy the greatest respect at court; house-dogs and no dogs at all are not even considered. -- Franz Grillparzer
I sometimes think that never blows so red The Rose as where some buried Caesar bled; That every Hyacinth the Garden wears Dropt in her Lap from some once lovely Head. -- Edward Fitzgerald
And behind their frail partitions Business women lie and soak, Seeing through the draughty skylight Flying clouds and railway smoke. Rest you there, poor unbelov'd ones, Lap your loneliness in heat, All too soon the tiny breakfast, Trolley-bus and windy street! -- John Betjeman
Reading Ngo Tu Lap's poems, terrible nostalgia wells up in me- nostalgia for a lost time and a far-gone country, nostalgia for people I've loved, and for creatures of forests and rivers. I feel gratitude too. War is over. Peace arrives with these beautiful poems. -- Maxine Hong Kingston
Sport is a passion and out of passion comes love. No point trying to work out why some become heroes and others don't. The chosen ones just go into the pantheon and refuse to fade. Think of Bradman and Les Darcy, Phar Lap and Tommy Corrigan. -- Les Carlyon
I've been in more laps than a napkin. -- Mae West
The fact that I am still alive after 100,000 laps is my championship. -- Jacky Ickx
I didn't have a clue where I was going on my first lap of practice. -- Joey Dunlop
F1 teams need a driver who will consistently set lap times that are 100 percent on the edge. -- Jean Alesi
When Liza Minelli was a child, she used to sit on my lap and call me Uncle Sammy. -- Sammy Davis, Jr.
O Brother, Where Art Thou?' was this role that utterly fell into my lap and changed my life. -- Tim Blake Nelson
Living in the lap of luxury isn't bad except that you never know when luxury is going to stand up. -- Orson Welles
Qualifying is all about putting everything that you have and that the car has in one lap. It's like a rush, I really enjoy that. -- Sebastian Vettel
Being a functioning alcoholic is kind of like being a paraplegic lap dancer - you can do it, just not as well as the others, really. -- Robin Williams
I'm very specific and ambitious in plotting out my goals and never take no for an answer - so it's not like things just fall in my lap. -- Darren Criss
When I got a lap dance, because I was 17, they had to put a massive pillow between me and the girl when she was grinding me. It was weird, yet pleasurable. -- Emile Hirsch
But if you can find that spot - I suppose it's like running - I used to be a swimmer and swim laps, and you just have to be there with what you're doing. -- Bruce Nauman
Hopefully my fan base doesn't lock me into 'Twilight,' you lose yourself. You should do things for you, and I have been really lucky to have things that really rock me and really move me falling into my lap. -- Kristen Stewart
I have never had a lap dance in Tampa or any other part of Florida. If I ever did have a lap dance, I don't think I would be discussing television ideas with the girl that was giving it to me. -- Stan Lee
I don't have a problem with delegation. I love to delegate. I am either lazy enough, or busy enough, or trusting enough, or congenial enough, that the notion leaving tasks in someone else's lap doesn't just sound wise to me, it sounds attractive. -- John Ortberg
My very favorite wrestler of all time was Andre the Giant. He was sort of like my best friend, believe it or not, and I have a picture in 'People' magazine of me sitting on his lap when I was 8 years old after 'WrestleMania I.' -- Stephanie McMahon
With the help of a friend I got father into a wagon, when the crowd had gone. I held his head in my lap during the ride home. I believed he was mortally wounded. He had been stabbed down through the kidneys, leaving an ugly wound. -- Buffalo Bill
Most fathers don't see the war within the daughter, her struggles with conflicting images of the idealized and flawed father, her temptation both to retreat to Daddy's lap and protection and to push out of his embrace to that of beau and the world beyond home. -- Victoria Secunda
Happiness is like a cat, If you try to coax it or call it, it will avoid you; it will never come. But if you pay not attention to it and go about your business, you'll find it rubbing against your legs and jumping into your lap. -- William Bennett
For me, triathlons were something that was down to me and my fitness. Now, I really enjoy the pain in the triathlon of chasing someone down. It's a bit like chasing down Nico Rosberg in the last few laps at Silverstone - it makes you feel alive. -- Jenson Button
When I read 'Rocky V,' it was a terrific story, a great script. Rocky died at the end. He has this devastating fight with Tommy Gunn, ends up in an ambulance with his head in Adrian's lap, and by the time they get to the hospital, he's dead. -- John G. Avildsen
We have the 2004 M1 here for reference, which is useful. It worked well here last year; we won the race and always did fast lap times so it will be interesting to compare it to the new bike and it will help us to understand which parts have improved -- Valentino Rossi
My father could be very strict, but very fair. His father was the same. We all respected my grandfather; he was the head of the clan. Every morning, we all had to say good morning and kiss his hand. But not me. I jumped on his lap and bit him. -- Azzedine Alaia
I'm very much in the trenches, and I don't live in the lap of luxury. I come from a working-class military family. We watch the news and read the paper and vote, so there's always something to be upset about. I always have a certain amount of angst in my back pocket. -- Pink
Things are forgotten and then perhaps picked up again, if we're lucky, it lasts... if not, then it's in the lap of the gods. The important thing was to do some work that I liked and hopefully that some others might also like, whether for a minute, a week, a month, a year. -- Tom Glazer
We are still so close, David and I. We were at a party the other day at my mum's house and I was sitting on his lap. We're very affectionate. And I looked at him and thought after being married for 11 years! We were the only couple who were even near each other at that party. We're soul mates. -- Victoria Beckham
We were playing a fair, and a few people were handing me stuffed animals and flowers, but one person handed me a paper sack. So I took all the stuff back to the bus. I put the sack in my lap and opened it, and a live iguana jumped out of the sack and onto my shirt. I screamed like a little girl! -- Blake Shelton
Asleep in lap of legends old. -- John Keats
But winter lingering chills the lap of May. -- Oliver Goldsmith
I'll make my heaven in a lady's lap -- William Shakespeare
We lie in the lap of immense intelligence. -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Girl who sit on Judge's lap get honorable discharge. -- Confucius
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I keep chicks in my lap, throwing me head fakes! -- Fabolous
Everything that ever happened to me fell in my lap. -- Oveta Culp Hobby
Writing and directing just sort of fell into my lap. -- John Krasinski
Few things are more delightful than grandchildren fighting over your lap. -- Doug Larson
Even at the End of Days, there will be lap dancing. -- Chris Rose
The baby romped on my lap like a short stout salmon. -- Sylvia Townsend Warner
If you can't distinguish people from lap-dogs, you shouldn't undertake philanthropic work. -- Anton Chekhov
It's lap 26 of 58, which unless I'm very much mistaken is half way. -- Murray Walker
I can write with a crying child on my lap. I have. Often. -- David Baldacci
It's all about the work. Nothing is going to fall into your lap. -- Russell Simmons
Who are the violets now That strew the lap of the new-come spring? -- William Shakespeare
The seasons alter: hoary-headed frosts Fall in the fresh lap of the crimson rose. -- William Shakespeare
So may'st thou live, till like ripe fruit thou drop Into thy mother's lap. -- John Milton
And this is the third place car about to lap the second place car. -- Murray Walker
Who, as they sung, would take the prison'd soul And lap it in Elysium. -- John Milton
This directing thing just sort of fell my way and landed in my lap. -- Charles S. Dutton
No louder shrieks to pitying heaven are cast, When husbands or lap-dogs breathe their last. -- Alexander Pope
I understand that most ladies tend to prefer lap dogs.... Perhaps I am an exception. -- Emily Bronte
Take heed thou trust not the deceitful lap Of wanton Dalilah; the world's a trap. -- Francis Quarles
My cell phone fell off my lap. I was reaching for it in the back. -- Eddie Griffin
Every couple years, you know, these great things drop in my lap. It's been fantastic. -- John Stamos
Nothing falls into a man's lap from heaven. It is from labour that life grows. -- Adolf Hitler
Scotland has the only football team in the world that does a lap of disgrace. -- Billy Connolly
Sometimes in life, things just fall in to my lap. I'm very blessed that way. -- Aileen Quinn
Mansell is slowing it down, taking it easy. Oh, no he isn't! It's a lap record. -- Murray Walker
I never use a napkin on my lap at a restaurant...because I believe in myself. -- Hannibal Buress
We dropped our troubles into the lap of the storyteller, and they turned into someone else's. -- Naomi Shihab Nye
On Sleep's soft lap the head without a crown Forgot the gilded trouble it had worn" -- Edward Bulwer Lytton
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Pansies in soft April rains Fill their stalks with honeyed sap Drawn from Earth's prolific lap. -- Bayard Taylor
Angel? Angels didn't sit on the lap of wicked scoundrels-not unless they were the fallen kind. -- Sabrina Jeffries
You're in the lap of the gods. If people go, they go, and if they don't. -- Sam Mendes
My uncle used to sit me on his lap and play "ventriloquist", only I wasn't wearing pants. -- Thom Yorke
Some women run with wolves, but the majority would be much happier with your basic lap dog. -- Paula Wall
As a driver, you want to race every lap possible, especially when you've got a good car. -- Romain Grosjean
Police on my drawers I had to pause 40 ounce in my lap And it's freezing my balls -- Eazy-E
Some day your head won't find my lap so easily. Trust is a habit you'll soon break. -- Imtiaz Dharker
To be thrown upon one's own resources, is to be cast in the very lap of fortune. -- Benjamin Franklin
You might be a redneck if Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap. -- Jeff Foxworthy
It's very, very rare in this business [moviemaking] where a script lands on your lap ready to go. -- Leonardo DiCaprio
He is accelerating all the time. That last lap was run in 64 seconds and the one before in 62. -- David Coleman
Space tourism is God's way of telling you you aren't spending enough on lap dances, baccarat and cocaine. -- Bill Maher
Autumn Into earth's lap does throw Brown apples gay in a game of play, As the equinoctials blow. -- Dinah Maria Murlock Craik
Her mouth was soft and moist, and she came to me like a dachshund jumping into your lap. -- Charles Williams
Welcome to,to,to,to,to Stutterville! P,p,p,please have a seat on your own lap. -- Jarod Kintz
Cats, I always think, only jump into your lap to check if you are cold enough, yet, to eat. -- Anne Enright
At Christmas time I sat on Santa's lap. His fly was open ! Boy what a present he gave me ! -- Rodney Dangerfield
There is no home as comfortable as your father's arms and no bed as soft as your mother's lap. -- Faraaz Kazi
Imagine censors that wouldn't let you sit in a man's lap. I've been in more laps than a napkin! -- Mae West
Women want certain things in marriage--the right to a title and a front seat in the lap of luxury. -- Mae West
I gave my wife a kiss this morning. She jumped out of bed and did a lap of honour. -- Frank Carson
Everyone thinks something like 'The Hills' just falls into your lap. It's not true. You have to work for everything. -- Brody Jenner
You can do this, Adria. Don't wolf-out on me, especially not in my lap, alright? These are my favorite jeans. -- J.A. Redmerski
I'm sympathetic to the decent and hapless footsoldier into whose lap falls the unenviable duty of carrying out fubar policies. -- Rene Balcer
Sedition is bred in the lap of luxury and its chosen emissaries are the beggared spendthrift and the impoverished libertine. -- George Bancroft
Men know no medium: They will either, spaniel-like, fawn at your feet, or be ready to leap into your lap. -- Samuel Richardson
The censors wouldn't even let me sit on a guy's lap, and I've been on more laps than a table-napkin. -- Mae West
The only sliding I did was on the kind of instrument that you put on your lap; no Spanish electrics. -- John Fogerty
Where does my fist go when I open up my hand? Where does my lap go when I stand up? -- Alan Watts
Sitting in the lap of the model you intend to paint never seemed to me to be the ideal location. -- Julian Green
When I stop chasing all the wrong things in life all the good things start to fall into my lap. -- Danny Castillo
I'm in love with boxing. It fell into my lap and I have been in love with it ever since. -- Keith Thurman
How do you summon up courage to dismiss a cat who is paying you a compliment of sitting on your lap? -- Derek Tangye
Destiny doesn't ask you if you want it Syn, it just forces it into your lap and deal with it. -RYDER -- Amelia Hutchins
Go away. I told you, I'm not interested." She looked from his lap to his face. "Your nose is growing too. -- Cindy Gerard
He used to sit on my lap. I was sort of ambivalent about that. He was surviving any way he could. -- Marion Zimmer Bradley
I have perfected the art of putting my feet on my husband's lap during awards ceremonies so he can rub them. -- Annette Bening
Such a man, truly wise, creams off Nature leaving the sour and the dregs for philosophy and reason to lap up. -- Jonathan Swift

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