Ellsworth Quotes in Ri¢hie Ri¢h (1994)

School Teacher: [In the typical deep slow voice acting of Ben Stein] Let's move on to case study #12: Your company is in dire straits. Sales are down 50% due to stiff price competition. Dividends are falling. Stockholders are demanding that you step down as chariman of the board. Now, here's your problem: How do you rally the board of directors to your side AND stave off impending bankruptcy...? Reynolds?

Reynolds: [who has been reading a newspaper] I'll have my secretary get back to you on that one.

School Teacher: See me after class, Reynolds. Ellsworth, how would you get the board on your side?

Ellsworth: [who has been playing miniature golf] Bribe someone.

School Teacher: [sighs] Sit down, Ellsworth. Reginald, what would you do?

Reginald: [who is being fitted by a tailor] What would I do? Simple. I'd float a rumor that we're the object of a takeover bid. And as soon as our stock went up, I'd sell.

School Teacher: That's not only unethical, Reginald, it's illegal.

Reginald: I'm only 12. I can't be held legally responsible.

School Teacher: Hmm, good point.

Richie Rich: How come all we do is talk about money? Why don't we do something fun.

Ellsworth: Money is fun!

[Richie and his private-schoolmates are on break from their fencing class]

Reynolds: Capital appreciation is all well and good, but not without a sound growth strategy.

Ellsworth: Well, I've only got one word to say to you: pork bellies.

Richie Rich: ...I'm wondering if you guys can come over this weekend and hang out with me. Like normal kids do.

Reynolds: *Normal* kids? You're really acting weird, Richie. Anyway, no can do. I promised my dad I'd go with him for a hostile takeover in Tokyo.

Richie Rich: Et tu, Ellsworth?

Ellsworth: [shrugs] Trustees' meeting. Sorry.