Stand Up Comedy quotes:

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Stand-up comedy is a raunchy profession. -- Aziz Ansari
Wrestling was like stand-up comedy for me. -- Dwayne Johnson
Stand-up comedy is an art form and it dies unless you expand it. -- Sam Kinison
I do some of my best stand-up comedy during sound checks. -- Madonna Ciccone
I got lucky. I won the San Francisco Stand-Up Comedy Competition in 1977 while I was still at San Francisco State. -- Dana Carvey
I do think that stand-up comedy in general heavily favors masculinity and so I like to act a little feminine onstage. -- Bo Burnham
I am a guy who talks about bacon and escalators. Stand-up comedy is very much a conversation. It's very personal, stylistically. -- Jim Gaffigan
On MySpace ... the whole demographic of the stand-up comedy fan has changed. It's like an indie band thing. People think they've discovered you. -- Jim Gaffigan
A lot of stand-up comedy guys, when they get a little famous, just give up their stand-up career, and it cancels out the thing that set them apart. -- Johnny Knoxville
When you're a stand-up, you play in front of 600 people, and it's all about timing. I could never do stand-up comedy; it would be way too hard for me. -- Dean Norris
I personally have no interest in being a star or a celebrity. I want my stand-up comedy and how I think as a comedian to be recognized and successful. -- Jim Gaffigan
Stand-up comedy had an interesting effect on me in terms of how I started to think about constructing things, because I really loved the interstices, the linkages, or lack thereof. -- Mark Leyner
People need to write articles and they need to have angles in them and I'm grateful when people are doing articles, but I always say there's not a great mystery to stand-up comedy. -- Jim Gaffigan
I'm a stand-up comic. Anything else I do besides that is a plus, but stand-up comedy is what I do, it's what I've been doing and it's what I'm going to keep doing. -- Dave Attell
I keep my stand-up comedy notes in a pile on my desk. I don't organize my act. I keep myself in a state of confusion. It stresses me out, but I prefer creative chaos. -- Joy Behar
I'd been doing some light-beer commercials for Budweiser and Coors, and I was doing stand-up comedy. I wanted to get into the acting world, and my agent sent me on audition and they liked it. -- Kevin Nealon
I never wanted to be a model. I never wanted to be a serious actress. I started off doing comedy. I did a stand-up comedy camp at the Laugh Factory, and I started out on Nickelodeon. -- Amanda Bynes
Stand-up comedy and comedy in general is the ultimate form of free speech, because you get to poke holes in all the pretentious bubbles politicians and pundits and popes and pretenders try to float over our heads. -- Denis Leary
Have four things going. I have stand-up comedy, two television shows and I'm working on a play. I like to work, and I fear that something could fall through. You know what they say: 'The show must go off. -- Joy Behar
For me, stand-up comedy is a conversation between me and the audience. I have to keep them listening. When I'm making jokes about cake for twenty minutes, I have to make sure my audience is interested and following where I'm going. -- Jim Gaffigan
I did stand-up comedy for 18 years. Ten of those years were spent learning, four years were spent refining, and four years were spent in wild success. I was seeking comic originality, and fame fell on me as a byproduct. The course was more plodding than heroic. -- Steve Martin
It's exciting to be able to do something completely independent without anybody challenging it, and it's a big part of the reason why I'm enjoying doing the stand-up comedy, is I'm able to go out and interact with people one-on-one after the show. It's very punk-rock. -- Tom Green
To me, being brave is an element that is so important with stand-up comedy. It's not essential. There are many comics who were just funny, and that's fine, too. But that's never been what I was trying to do in comedy. I was always trying to do something that involved not pandering to the audience. -- Bill Maher
I play these sort of comical instruments I invented, like the electric rake and the electric plunger. I do a lot of almost stand-up comedy material. Just the juxtaposition of the different styles in itself sometimes is funny. Like, I do sort of an acoustic version of 'Purple Haze' that has some bluegrass licks in it. -- Eugene Chadbourne
I was doing stand up comedy when I was 11, that's how I got started; not because I wanted to do comedy, but because we were broke, living in Echo Park in Downtown Los Angeles, from 1986, I saw the Rodney King riots; my parents didn't really work. But I wanted a new backpack, that's how I got into this business - I wanted a new backpack. -- Shia LaBeouf
Stand-up comedy and poverty. Those were my two main endeavors. -- Dave Foley
I don't have any type of sketch-comedy or stand-up background. -- Jenna Fischer
You know, stand-up comedy is where I pretty much started out. -- Brion James
For me, the way I stay consistent is through stand-up comedy. -- Kevin Hart
I'm in a sketch comedy group in school and I also do stand-up. -- Jack Quaid
I did stand-up comedy for seventeen years. I need to explore other things. -- Dane Cook
When you are doing stand-up comedy, you are the writer, producer, director, sometimes bouncer. -- Dane Cook
The ability to workshop in stand-up comedy is incomparable to any art form, in my opinion. -- Mike Birbiglia
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When has stand-up comedy been kind to anyone? It goes after anyone who's the target. Comedy attacks, man. -- Sam Kinison
I go to a lot of stand-up comedy. I find more inspiration from observational stuff than from rap. -- Riz Ahmed
London seems to be a town with a lot of comedy fans and people that really enjoy stand-up. -- Aziz Ansari
After graduation, I was floundering in L.A., doing stand-up comedy and working in a shoe store in the Valley. -- Kevin Spacey
All of comedy at some level is trial-and-error, whether it's a stand-up trying out jokes or a comedy show trying stories. -- Michael Schur
Improv seemed to replace stand-up, which was very big before that. Stand-up comedy was real hot in the late '80s and through the '90s. -- Joe Flaherty
Stand-up can take you in so many different places, man. So many doors can be opened up from stand-up comedy, and the first one that was opened up for me was acting. -- Kevin Hart
But long story short, I didn't start doing stand-up because I wanted to have a TV show or be an actor or even wanted to write sketch comedy. I got into stand-up because I love stand-up. -- Demetri Martin
My sense of stand up comedy would be so esoteric. -- Paul Rudd
I usually have sex to my stand-up comedy album. Power move. -- Jeff Ross
I think stand-up comedy is this - it's this kind of indulgence and narcissism. -- Jim Gaffigan
As a live stand-up comedy performer, I have the benefit of choosing real entrance music. -- John Hodgman
Doing stand-up comedy is in the middle of a traffic jam getting everybody moving again. -- Jon Stewart
Stand-up comedy is like the lowest medium in all of show business in levels of respect. -- Chris Rock
I better start doing stand up comedy in Spanish before every comedian in Mexico translates my jokes. -- Felipe Esparza
Real comedy can't be learned; it comes from a need for justice. The best who stand up, stand up for something. -- Elayne Boosler
Stand-up comedy is mine: it's my entity; it's my brand; I own it. I do it when I want to do it. -- Kevin Hart
Stand-up and comedy is the place where we are supposed to be able to make fun of all of the world's ills. -- Tracy Morgan
I just liked stand-up comedy so much. I used to memorize Bill Cosby albums and other people's albums, George Carlin, Flip Wilson. -- Drew Carey
With stand-up, there's a little bit of an exaggerated reality because things have to be manipulated to create comedy, to create jokes. -- Chris Hardwick
I do podcasts for the same reasons I do stand-up comedy. I love it, and I don't care if anybody else gets it. -- Chris Hardwick
Stand-up keeps you alive. It is definitely the most specialized field in comedy because you need to stay sharp and well-tuned every night. -- Tommy Davidson
I hate being mean. I watch those roasts on Comedy Central and they make the hair on the back of my neck stand up. -- Downtown Julie Brown
I hate being mean. I watch those roasts on Comedy Central and they make the hair on the back of my neck stand up. -- Downtown Julie Brown
A really good stand-up comic is a poet; it's about the use of language. It can be really poetic. And I like politically conscious comedy. -- Sherman Alexie
As far as just my stand-up is concerned, I don't care about changing anyone's mind. I'm not making an argument. I'm a guy doing comedy. -- David Cross
Stand-up comedy in the end, unlike the rest of the entertainment industry, is a meritocracy. There's a certain level of undeniability you can work toward. -- Jim Gaffigan
My mom and dad are both in stand-up comedy, so that's where I started, that's where I got everything. My roots are holding the mic. -- Pauly Shore
It's the ultimate pinnacle of stand-up to have an hour on HBO, but way more people see Comedy Central, and they've been good to me. -- Daniel Tosh
While awaiting sentencing, I decided to give stand-up comedy a shot. The judge had suggested I get my act together, and I took him seriously. -- Tim Allen
Did you know I started out as a stand-up comic? People don't believe me when I tell them. That's how I saw myself, in comedy. -- Al Pacino
There's so much you can achieve with a launching pad like stand-up comedy. You can literally go from acting to hosting to being a personality. -- Kevin Hart
I think of a lot of comedy being watched alone, for some reason. It's surprising to me that people are getting together to watch stand-up comedy. -- Gary Gulman
I've been doing stand-up just about every night since I started in 1989. It's my home base. But I'm into doing comedy in all mediums, platforms and situations. -- Judah Friedlander
Stand-up is not just an American thing anymore. It's global. In some places, stand-up comedy is brand new. South Africa has only had a scene for 15 years. -- Gabriel Iglesias
If you are doing stand-up comedy, you have to be confident in what you are doing. That doesn't mean just because you are confident you are funny. -- Judah Friedlander
As soon as I did my first five minutes of stand-up I knew that I would rather be a failure at comedy than a success in marketing. -- Jimmy Carr
Having done stand-up on television and in stand-up specials for like Comedy Central, you learn quickly that for that type of performance you're playing to the camera. -- John Mulaney
I'm a comedian, for God's sake. Viewers shouldn't trust me. And you know what? They're hip enough to know they shouldn't trust me. I'm just doing stand-up comedy. -- Dennis Miller
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I'm not a comedian. I don't do stand-up. I don't tell jokes. I'm a comedic actor, and approach my work that way. The comedy comes through the character. -- Eugene Levy
Stand-up comedy is tough right now. Anybody can come to a concert, tape you, and put you up on the Internet. You either fight it or embrace it. -- Jeff Dunham
Stand-up comedy is the most relaxing thing I do. If I want to unwind and de-stress, I go out and do stand-up, often several shows in a night. -- Judah Friedlander
I took a job in a comedy club - not doing stand-up comedy, because that's my idea of hell, but in the office - and I went traveling. -- Phoebe Fox
You really have no idea whether or not what you're writing is funny. In stand-up and sketch comedy, you know right away and you can make your changes accordingly. -- Michael Showalter
Saturday Night Live was a show that I never thought I would be on, because I didn't do sketch comedy and I didn't do impressions. I was a stand-up. -- Kevin Nealon
A lot of stand-up comedy is embarrassing: too many idiots doing it in orange neckties against brick walls. I find most sitcoms embarrassing, too, because they seem so forced. -- Tracey Ullman
I think a lot comes from having the experience of doing stand-up comedy. It allows you to figure out the psychology of an audience; what things are funny and not. -- Keenen Ivory Wayans
I've a belt that I have worn for every single stand-up comedy session since I was 19. I fear if I ever lose it, my career would crumble. That's my one OCD. -- Vir Das
I can do more than just stand-up comedy, and the only way I'll be able to show that is if I do it myself. Because nobody trusts that I can do it. -- Dane Cook
I think people tune in to watch a football game because they want to watch a football game. If they wanted to watch a stand-up comedy show on HBO, that's where they'd go -- Dan Dierdorf
But sometimes it's good to dare yourself to do the unthinkable. And rather than stand in front of an audience with no clothes on, I decided to have a go at stand-up comedy. -- Evan Davis
I have a work-out regime; I am not a maniac. It sounds cliche, but stand-up comedy, doing a one-man show, helps keep me young, and yes, it is exhausting, but I don't collapse. -- Robert Klein
Stand-up comedy is a sickness. Who wouldn't want a room full of people laughing and screaming at you just because of who you are? Nothing is as good, except maybe having a baby. -- Howie Mandel
When I started stand-up - and this is in the '90s - there was definitely people hadn't watched decades of Comedy Central, where people are really much more educated on stand-up comedy. -- Jim Gaffigan
You're on stage and because stand-up comedy is one of the few meritocracies in the entertainment industry, there's some kind of - at least for me, there's some kind of idea of control. -- Jim Gaffigan
Georgia was a great place to live, but I wanted to get out because I knew the opportunities for what I was doing - stand-up comedy and eventually acting - were in Los Angeles. -- Chris Tucker

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