Sarah Palin quotes:

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Sarah Palin is a compelling political figure. -- Michele Bachmann
I'd vote for Mickey Mouse before I voted for John McCain and Sarah Palin. -- Edgar Bronfman, Sr.
I do have to give it up for Sarah Palin on one account. She is brave. -- Adam McKay
I like that lady - Sarah Palin. She's great. I like the cut of her jib. -- Paul Johnson
Any party that would put Sarah Palin up on a pedestal will never have my support. -- Jesse Ventura
Attending a Sarah Palin rally was simultaneously one of the strangest and most chilling events of my life. -- John Oliver
In fact Sarah Palin has created more jobs than Obama has. She created eleven jobs fact-checking at the AP just for the Palin autobiography. -- Ann Coulter
Sarah Palin embarrasses herself almost immediately upon opening her mouth to speak or upon moving her fingers to send messages to her dull flock. -- Henry Rollins
I don't usually admire Sarah Palin, but when she was making fun of this 'hopey changey stuff,' she was right: there was nothing there. -- Noam Chomsky
At one point, Sarah Palin sent her husband instructions to stock up on 'fresh fruit and veggies' for the kids, and 'as little processed foods as possible.' -- Bill Dedman
Sarah Palin is treated like a bimbo sometimes, but she has never given the public the respect they deserve. She acts silly and doesn't know stuff. She didn't even finish her term. -- Gail Collins
What people don't understand about Sarah Palin is that she is a rancher's wife. From Alberta down to Texas I've known women like that: good common sense, bright and vilified by city people. -- Robert Duvall
Sarah Palin is an heir to the women's movement. She has not been constrained by gender. At no point in her life has she thought, 'I can't do that because I'm a woman.' -- Gail Collins
Sarah Palin lacked the preparation or temperament to be one heartbeat away from the presidency, but what she possessed in abundance was the ability to inflame political passions and energize the John McCain campaign with star quality. -- Roger Ebert
My view of Sarah Palin is she is the most dynamic figure maybe in politics, even more in some ways than President Obama, who is a little more scripted than she is. He is great with the teleprompter. -- Rudy Giuliani
A few words about Sarah Palin: She is one of the most fascinating women I have ever met. She crackles with energy like a live electrical wire and on first meeting gets about three inches from your face. -- Mark McKinnon
Sarah Palin is a symbol of everything that is wrong with the modern United States. As a representative of our political system, she's a new low in reptilian villainy, the ultimate cynical masterwork of puppeteers like Karl Rove. -- Matt Taibbi
Have you ever seen Glenn Beck in operation? It is the most terrifying thing. It's so bad that you think he's going to announce in a minute that it's all a great con. He makes Sarah Palin look reasonable and steady. -- Bill Bryson
It is easy to see what many people, women especially, admire about Sarah Palin. Here is a mother of five who can see the bright side of having a child with Down syndrome and still find the time and energy to govern the state of Alaska. -- Sam Harris
Even though I don't agree with either Sarah Palin or Michele Bachmann on virtually anything, I do think the unique scrutiny - because of their gender and highlighting the potential conflict between them is a product of the media's desire for juicy storylines. I think it's inappropriate. -- Debbie Wasserman Schultz
On August 28, 2010, Fox News messiah Glenn Beck hosted a 'Restoring Honor' revival meeting featuring sexy guest star Sarah Palin, much as Bob Hope would roll out Raquel Welch in white go-go boots on his U.S.O. tours to give our fighting men a morale lift in their khakis. -- James Wolcott
I read 'Game Change.' If you want to relive the campaign, that book is unbelievable. It's great. It's the book of that campaign. It brought all the memories back of everything with Clinton and Obama, and Sarah Palin and McCain, and choosing her, and John Edwards. It was an interesting book. -- Annette Bening
For Sarah Palin, the least experienced on the world stage, the stress of maintaining the fiction that she was qualified to be vice president sent her over the deep end almost immediately. She went off on a ferocious spending spree that might have killed a lesser woman. Katie Couric's straightforward questions unraveled her. -- Tina Brown
Sarah Palin, who with 17 months remaining in her single term as Alaska's governor quit the only serious office she has ever held, is obsessively discussed as a possible candidate in 2012. Why? She is not going to be president and will not be the Republican nominee unless the party wants to lose at least 44 states. -- George Will
Hillary Clinton could say she was a woman and running for president. And Sarah Palin could say she was a woman and running for vice-president. But Obama couldn't say, 'I'm black and I'm running for president.' It couldn't come out of his mouth. He couldn't say that because, if he did, he'd lose votes. -- Paul Mooney
It is interesting - you find in the United States, there is a kind of anti-education hostility. It's the sort of Sarah Palin constituency which does seem to actually be hostile to the New York, Boston, San Francisco educated elite. You know, 'We good plain folks from the middle of the country are just as good as you pointy-headed intellectuals.' -- Richard Dawkins
Sarah Palin's a quitter. -- Jesse Ventura
Tina Fey could run this country before Sarah Palin could! -- Nikki Reed
Sarah Palin met the wombshifter! Old Sarah and the wombshifter. -- Mike Tyson
I think Sarah Palin is amazing. I totally admire her. -- Nadine Dorries
I hired Sarah Palin because she was hot and got ratings. -- Roger Ailes
Lady Liberty and Sarah Palin are lit by the same torch. -- Michele Bachmann
Sarah Palin has been tagged and released back into the wild. -- Jon Stewart
I got all the Sarah Palin I need for one lifetime. -- Meghan McCain
Sarah Palin's real quality is that she is her own best creation. -- Julianne Moore
I have students whose fathers are voting for Sarah Palin. It's wild. -- Anne Waldman
(Sarah Palin's) greatest hypocrisy is in her pretense that she is a woman. -- Wendy Doniger
It is hard to know what Sarah Palin means in Republican politics anymore. -- Rachel Maddow
Sarah Palin should not be on vacation. She should be in summer school. -- Bill Maher
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Sarah Palin is joining Fox News. The new slogan is 'hair and unbalanced.' -- David Letterman
Snooki is now a published author. I'm blaming Sarah Palin. She lowered the bar. -- David Letterman
I'll show you Obama's birth certificate when you show me Sarah Palin's high school diploma. -- Bill Maher
Asked who attacked America on 9/11, [Sarah Palin] suggested several times that it was Saddam Hussein. -- John Heilemann
Sarah Palin knows more about energy than probably anyone else in the United States of America. -- John McCain
Sarah Palin finally heard what happened in Japan and she's demanding that we invade 'Tsunami.' -- Bill Maher
In choosing Governor Sarah Palin as his running mate, John McCain has chosen for the future. -- Rudy Giuliani
Sarah Palin is Latina. Pay-leen. She has an infant and a grandkid the same age. Latina! -- George Lopez
Sarah Palin has decided not to run for President and go straight to the quitting part. -- Andy Borowitz
You know, I just want to say to her (Sarah Palin), just very quickly...F-- you. -- Jon Stewart
As much as I disagree with Sarah Palin, there's no denying that she was the victim of sexism. -- Jessica Valenti
They say the oil spill has the potential to kill more wildlife than a Sarah Palin hunting trip. -- David Letterman
This week Sarah Palin's memoir became a bestseller. It's not even out yet. It's being translated into English. -- Bill Maher
Not a lot of people know about Tunisia. Sarah Palin thinks it's the name of one of Obama's kids. -- Bill Maher
As a loyal American and I think a patriotic American, no, I don't want Sarah Palin to be president. -- Bill Maher
John McCain famously has been incredibly loyal to Sarah Palin ever since he picked her as his running mate. -- Rachel Maddow
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Sarah Palin made her debut as a Fox News analyst. They finally found a job that she's not under-qualified for. -- David Letterman
Sarah Palin's book is big, 400 pages. She wrote the book herself and agonized over every word, and so will you. -- David Letterman
I saw that with Hillary Clinton and Sarah Palin in 2008. I mean, I came away from the 2008 campaign feeling really icky. -- Kellyanne Conway
There is great variation in brain power all the way from Einstien on one hand to Sarah Palin on the other. -- Richard Dawkins
Sarah Palin's whole family got into a drunken public fistfight. Something police are calling a 'tragic case of trash-on-trash violence.' -- Bill Maher
The broader question if Sarah Palin becomes vice president, will she be shortchanging her kids or will she be shortchanging the country? -- Amy Robach
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I'd like to thank readers. Every time you open a book, it is a strike against ignorance. Unless you're reading Sarah Palin. -- Libba Bray
What about Sarah Palin. Donald Trump had suggested she would be in his cabinet if he won. Is she going to be in? -- Megyn Kelly
I'm thankful for Sarah Palin's vice presidential bid, which taught us that Alaska is not in a box off the coast of California. -- Paula Poundstone
Folks, Sarah Palin said she could see Russia from Alaska. Mitt Romney talks like he's only seen Russia by watching 'Rocky IV.' -- John F. Kerry
I need to know if she [Sarah Palin] thinks dinosaurs were here four thousand years ago... because she's going to have the nuclear code. -- Matt Damon
Her [Sarah Palin] son went to Iraq under George W. Bush, but it gives us a chance to explain what post-traumatic stress disorder is. -- Jon Soltz
If there is such a thing as karma, let's hope that Sarah Palin comes back as a wolf being shot at from a plane. -- Bill Maher
I think that Sarah Palin really missed the chance to educate the public on what some of the challenges her son is actually facing. -- Jon Soltz
John McCains choice of Sarah Palin as running mate is the towering example of his poor judgment. Palins ignorance of public affairs is monumental. -- Edgar Bronfman, Sr.
John McCain's choice of Sarah Palin as running mate is the towering example of his poor judgment. Palin's ignorance of public affairs is monumental. -- Edgar Bronfman, Sr.
Sarah Palin is now the guy who hangs out in the high school parking lot, showing off his car, five years after he graduated. -- Rachel Maddow
If I were Sarah Palin, would I want to sit in an interview with someone who was secretly out to get me? Probably not. -- Megyn Kelly
I actually prepared Vice President Biden for his debate in the last election. I played Sarah Palin. It's a little tough debating a woman. -- Jennifer Granholm
I think if we really break it down and talk about post-traumatic stress disorder, it`s very different than the way Sarah Palin explained it. -- Jon Soltz
Wacko Glenn Beck is a sad answer to the Sarah Palin endorsement that [Ted] Cruz so desperately wanted. Glenn is a failing, crying, lost soul. -- Donald Trump
Of course, Republicans still can't believe that Barack Obama won the Nobel Peace Prize. But then Democrats can't believe that Sarah Palin wrote a book. -- Jay Leno
John McCain said that Sarah Palin is still a force in the Republican Party. Then he got in his car and backed over his mailbox. -- David Letterman
I do not make jokes about Sarah Palin simply because I could not live in this world if I believed she was a real person. -- Lewis Black
Let's not forget, Sarah Palin may not have a golden touch, but, she gave Christine O'Donnell candidate a big touch that got her over the top. -- Chris Matthews
They determined who got the first question by a coin toss, to which Sarah Palin said, 'Oh, what a coincidence, that's how I got picked.' -- Jay Leno
Do you get the feeling with Sarah Palin, in high school, she was voted least likely to write a book and most likely to burn one? -- Robin Williams
Sarah Palin is an attractive candidate, but based on her background, she only was governor for what, two years. I don`t think she passed that test. -- Dick Cheney
Americans have gotten to know Sarah Palin. They know that she's a role model to women and other - and reformers all over America. She's a reformer. -- John McCain
The United States ranks 14th in the world in education. Even if we subtract Sarah Palin's test scores, it only bumps us to third. Damn you, Finland! -- Christopher Titus
Democrats are calling Christine O'Donnell 'the Sarah Palin of the East.' Really? She's a loud, emotionally unstable woman from Delaware. That's not Sarah Palin, that's Joe Biden. -- Craig Ferguson
With Halloween coming this weekend, they say not one person in the country is planning to dress up as Governor Sarah Palin. You know why? ... The costume costs $150,000. -- Jay Leno
Final installment of Things More Fun Than Reading the Sarah Palin Memoir: Driving into a tree, microwaving your head, and getting stabbed in the eye with a carrot. -- David Letterman
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I respect Sarah Palin. I appreciate her and her husband enormously. I think she will continue to play a major role in the future of the Republican Party. -- John McCain
It is sometimes hard to know what Sarah Palin means, just on a day to day basis. Sometimes it is hard to follow what she is talking about. -- Rachel Maddow
A "New York Times"/CBS poll found 59 percent of the country didn`t think Sarah Palin was prepare for the job that John McCain had picked her for. -- Rachel Maddow
I want you [Sarah Palin] to know you have my support. But please look into protection for your family. An attempt on you could bring the republic down. -- Glenn Beck
I worked for Sarah Palin. I have the political staffer version of P.T.S.D., so whenever I hear that she's breaking her silence, my heart stops. -- Nicolle Wallace
Why is it our business whether Sarah Palin returned to her job as governor three days after her son was born, or three months? Is there a right answer? -- Susan Estrich
Sarah Palin has strong opinions on the Libyans. She said, 'Marriage is between a man and a woman and Libyans like Rachel Maddow are what's ruining this country.' -- Bill Maher
Sarah Palin has been hired back by Fox News, and she only left five months ago. She has now effectively quit quitting. She can't even commit to being uncommitted. -- John Oliver
It's a great day for Sarah Palin. She was hired as a commentator for Fox News. She signed a multi-year contract, which means she'll probably quit after a year. -- Craig Ferguson
Sarah Palin uses me as a laugh line in her stump speeches. If you're willing to turn me into a joke, you should also be willing to talk to me. -- Rachel Maddow
Rick Santorum said this week that his 12-year-old could out-reason me about God. Look, I am not about to debate a home-schooled 12-year-old. I have enough trouble with Sarah Palin. -- Bill Maher
I was shocked [of Sarah Palin ], because beating up, you know, your girlfriend, your spouse, or acts of violence aren`t one of the core symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder. -- Jon Soltz
I have criticisms of Ronald Reagan, but he lives in another universe from the kind of political theater that is represented by people, like Sarah Palin, who aren't really public servants. -- Eugene Jarecki
For some reason, the Secret Service revealed this, that Sarah Palin's Secret Service code name is 'Denali.' Turns out 'Denali' is an old Eskimo name that means 'Dan Quayle.' -- Jay Leno
In her new book, Sarah Palin says she once gave up chocolate for an entire year just to prove she could do it. Still think she's not qualified to be President? -- Jimmy Fallon
Sarah Palin is an empty vessel ready to be filled by ideology that she doesn't even understand, and that is really scary. Nothing is more frightening than an empty vessel in power. -- Chris Matthews
It isn't fate but fecklessness that has shoved Sarah Palin to the sidelines of national politics. The real tragedy is that she's taken a lot of other serious Republican women with her. -- Dee Dee Myers
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Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann represent an existential threat to the Democratic Party the way that twenty years ago Clarence Thomas as a black man represented to liberals and the Democratic Party. -- Andrew Breitbart
I believe Sarah Palin is a true statesman, whose experience as a failed vice presidential candidate, half-term governor and eight-episode reality star has fully prepared her to take control of our nuclear arsenal. -- Stephen Colbert
Not only did I feel hurt that she [Sarah Palin] sort of misdiagnosed all of these veterans, but I think she sort of was wrong in the way she talked about the issue. -- Jon Soltz
Cultural stupidity accounts for virtually every aspect of Sarah Palin, both as a person and a political icon. Which, come to think of it, may be a pretty good reason not to misunderstimate her. -- Joe Bageant
I, my own damn self, am not a Tea Party supporter. I disagree with them on social liberties, our overseas wars, Obama's birthplace, Sarah Palin, and the conspicuous absence of tea at their rallies. -- Penn Jillette
John McCain said that Barack Obama is already measuring the drapes in the White House. That's what he said. I understand Sarah Palin is already driving McCain around to look at assisted living facilities. -- Jay Leno
Sarah Palin, suggesting her son`s arrest on domestic violence charges was a result of post-traumatic stress disorder and partially due to President Obama`s lack of respect for men and women in uniform. -- Chris Hayes
When the U.S. Supreme Court upheld the Affordable Care Act, Sarah Palin tweeted, 'Obama lies; freedom dies.' She's referring, I guess, to the freedom to go without health care when you're sick. -- Richard Trumka
Sarah Palin is very pro-life of course, unless the life is that of an Iraqi civilian or a wolf running frantically from a roaring helicopter while being strafed with ribbons of automatic weapons fire. -- Seth MacFarlane

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