Giraffe quotes:

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You need that guy like a giraffe needs strep throat. -- Ann Landers
I was once kissed on the lips by a giraffe, and I don't think I've ever got over it. -- Joanna Lumley
I'm a giraffe. I even walk like a giraffe with a long neck and legs. It's a pretty dumb animal, mind you. -- Sophia Loren
It's an incredibly difficult thing to bring a giraffe down. They can kill a lion with a single blow from their feet. -- Joanna Lumley
NASA space scientists have been studying giraffe skin so they can apply what they learn from it to the construction of spacesuits. -- Joanna Lumley
God is really only another artist. He invented the giraffe, the elephant and the cat. He has no real style, He just goes on trying other things. -- Pablo Picasso
You can't always write a chord ugly enough to say what you want to say, so sometimes you have to rely on a giraffe filled with whipped cream. -- Frank Zappa
My childhood was really comfortable and secure, but school was a nightmare. I was a lot taller than the other girls and they called me Gitte the giraffe. -- Brigitte Nielsen
I have a toy giraffe on my bed. I've got photographs over my desk as well as a mask of a giraffe in my kitchen. I am totally hooked. -- Joanna Lumley
The Giraffe took the horse's head and led him along on the most level parts of the road towards the railway station, and two or three chaps went along to help get the sick man into the train. -- Henry Lawson
Jason said, "Yes. Gerard T. Giraffe." What does the 'T' stand for?" 'The. -- Douglas Coupland
In a Giraffe institution, the head nurse job would be to serve the nurses, not to control them. Teachers are there to serve the students, not control them. -- Marshall B. Rosenberg
All you do is to look / At a page in this book / Because that's where we always will be. / No book ever ends / When it's full of your friends / The Giraffe and the Pelly and me. -- Roald Dahl
Evolution is so creative. That's how we got giraffes. -- Kurt Vonnegut
A bit of advice: never read a pop-up book about giraffes. -- Sean Lock
Sometimes facing opportunity is like staring at the knees of a giraffe. -- Laurie Beth Jones
A penguin cannot become a giraffe, so just be the best penguin you can be. -- Gary Vaynerchuk
Well as giraffes say, you don't get no leaves unless you stick your neck out. -- Sid Waddell
Why didn't evolution make a giraffe good at carpentry so it could build a ladder? -- Karl Pilkington
The human body has no more need for cows' milk than it does for dogs' milk, horses' milk, or giraffes' milk. -- Michael Klaper
My favourite animal is the koala, but his life would be boring. I would rather be a giraffe so that I could contemplate the beauty of Africa. -- Caterina Murino
A man is born an artist as a hippopotamus is born a hippopotamus; and you can no more make yourself one than you can make yourself a giraffe. -- John Ruskin
Why would you want to go all the way to Africa and shoot a giraffe? I don't think you can eat him. I only shoot stuff I can eat. -- Boo Weekley
I have friends who come to the Australia Zoo, and it's just, instead of playing video games, we get to hug and kiss a giraffe or walk a tiger. -- Bindi Irwin
If combat means living in a ditch, females have biological problems staying in a ditch for 30 days because they get infections. . . . Males are biologically driven to go out and hunt giraffes. -- Newt Gingrich
I know who I am. No one else knows who I am. If I was a giraffe, and someone said I was a snake, I'd think, no, actually I'm a giraffe. -- Richard Gere
All men are not slimy warthogs. Some men are silly giraffes, some woebegone puppies, some insecure frogs. But if one is not careful, those slimy warthogs can ruin it for all the others. -- Cynthia Heimel
I don't care what color the parents are. I don't care if it's a giraffe and a fish living together. If they're raising children who believe they're honored and loved, that's all that's important. -- Patricia Polacco
As a woman, it seems you can't just be a comedian; you're always classed as something else, too, whether that's 'beautiful,' 'pint-sized,' 'larger-than-life' or in my case, 'Hattie Jacques-esque,' 'the giraffe,' 'big.' -- Miranda Hart
If I know a song of Africa, of the giraffe and the African new moon lying on her back, of the plows in the fields and the sweaty faces of the coffee pickers, does Africa know a song of me? -- Karen Blixen
In the giraffe with a total height of 5 m., the heart is at a height of about 2.5 m., and it would be extremely interesting to know just how the giraffe avoids the development of filtration oedema in its long legs. -- August Krogh
I would be a giraffe because I just want to experience what a sore throat and being a giraffe feels like. It would be really uncomfortable walking around in the Sahara and being like, 'I really need, like, 15 lozenges for my giraffe body.' -- Charlie Puth
The thing about owls is that they do sort of have this facial disc, which is unlike any other bird. They kind of have a face, more than like a dog or a giraffe. They have this weird, alien face that you can actually make expressive. -- Zack Snyder
People are the only animals that drink the milk of the mother of another species. All other animals stop drinking milk altogether after weaning. It is unnatural for a dog to nurse from a mother giraffe; it is just as unnatural for a human being to drink the milk of a cow. -- Michael Klaper
Meditation is another dimension of natural beauty. People talk about appreciating natural beauty-climbing mountains, seeing giraffes and tigers in Africa, and all sorts of things. But nobody seems to appreciate this kind of natural beauty of ourselves. This is actually far more beautiful than flora and fauna, far more fantastic, far more painful and colorful and delightful. -- Chogyam Trungpa
I remember at The Quilted Giraffe, when I was when working there to try out for the sous-chef position. I really wanted it, and the woman working the line next to me kept messing up and making me look bad. The last day of my kitchen trail, I just said to her very quietly, 'Do me a favor and get out of my way, because I want this job.' -- Tom Colicchio
I stay higher than giraffe pussy -- Gucci Mane
Gonzo leaps like a giraffe and grabs it. -- Jerry Coleman
Hyypia rises like a giraffe to head the ball clear -- George Hamilton
I'd hate to be a giraffe with a sore throat. -- Mitch Hedberg
On the neck of a giraffe a flea begins to believe in immortality. -- Bill Vaughan
I saw a giraffe with a short neck That was sad Or a deer -- Bo Burnham
When asked if he was a basketball player he replied No I clean giraffe ears. -- Elvin Hayes
Did you ever see a giraffe? It is like something from between the regions of truth and fiction. -- Geraldine Jewsbury
His heart beat so rapidly it might burst; he kept telling himself everything was fine so long as he remained a giraffe. -- Andrew Sturm
A giraffe has a black tongue twenty-seven inches long and no vocal cords. A giraffe has nothing to say. He just goes on giraffing. -- Robert Fulghum
Give me a black man, a white woman, a giraffe, a zebra anything but another white man! That last one f***ed up my roof! -- Chris Rock
Who could believe an ant in theory? A giraffe in blueprint? Ten thousand doctors of what's possible Could reason half the jungle out of being. -- John Ciardi
When Andy Carroll first appeared on the scene he was a tall skinny kid and his coordination was all over the place. He reminded me of a giraffe. -- Glenn Roeder
Wildlife is something which man cannot construct. Once it is gone, it is gone forever. Man can rebuild a pyramid, but he can't rebuild ecology, or a giraffe. -- Joy Adamson
As a balloon expands, so too does my love for you with each passing day. To know how I truly feel about you, look no further than the balloon giraffe. -- Jarod Kintz
Another Thing I'm Sick of Hearing: If I started that gay rights group, I must be gay. So if i start an animal rights group, what does that make me? A giraffe? -- James Howe
A giraffe is so much a lady that one refrains from thinking of her legs, but remembers her as floating over the plains in long garb, draperies of morning mist her mirage. -- Isak Dinesen
That's just how time travel looks like to the untrained eye. The reason why there aren't more travelers is that your average physicist refuses to be eaten by a giraffe in the name of science. -- Bradley Sands

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