Smalls Quotes in The Sandlot (1993)

Ham Porter: Hey, Smalls, you wanna s'more?

Smalls: Some more of what?

Ham Porter: No, do you wanna s'more?

Smalls: I haven't had anything yet, so how can I have some more of nothing?

Ham Porter: You're killing me Smalls! These are s'more's stuff! Ok, pay attention. First you take the graham, you stick the chocolate on the graham. Then you roast the 'mallow. When the 'mallows flaming... you stick it on the chocolate. Then cover with the other end. Then you scarf. Kind of messy, but good! Try some!

Smalls: I was gonna put the ball back.

Squints: But it was signed by Babe Ruth!

Smalls: Yeah, you keep telling me that! Who is she?

Ham Porter: WHAT? WHAT?

Kenny: The sultan of swat!

Bertram: The king of crash!

Timmy: The colossus of clout!

Tommy: The colossus of clout!

All: BABE RUTH!

Ham Porter: THE GREAT BAMBINO!

Smalls: Oh my god! You mean that's the same guy?

All: YES!

Benny Rodriguez: Smalls, Babe Ruth is the greatest baseball player that ever lived. People say he was less than a god but more than a man. You know, like Hercules or something. That ball you just aced to The Beast is worth, well, more than your whole life.

Smalls: [Falls to the ground and clutches his stomach, groaning] I don't feel so good.

All: [Fanning Scott with their caps] Give him air, give him air.

Ham Porter: [mimicking Babe Ruth with a cigar in his mouth; can't understand him] Check this out. I'm the Great Bambino.

Sandlot Kids: What?

Ham Porter: [still can't understand him] I'm the Great Bambino!

Sandlot Kids: What?

Ham Porter: [takes cigar out of mouth] I'm the Great Bambino.

Sandlot Kids: Oh!

Smalls: Who's that?

Smalls: [narrating] I had no idea what they were talking about.

Ham Porter: What did he say?

Bertram: What? Were you born in a barn, man?

Yeah Yeah: Yeah yeah, what planet are you from?

Smalls: [narrating] But there was no *way* I could let them know.

Squints: You've never heard of the sultan of swat?

Kenny: The titan of terror.

Timmy: The colossus of clout!

Tommy: The colossus of clout!

Benny Rodriguez: The king of crash, man.

Smalls: [narrating] So, I lied.

Smalls: Oh! The Great Bambino. Of course. I thought you said the great Bambi.

Ham Porter: That wimpy deer?

Squints: [Squints is about to tell a story] Quiet! Are you trying to wake it up. It just went to bed!

Smalls: [quite loudly] What just went to bed?

All: SHH!

[whispering]

All: The Beast.

Smalls: [louder] Oh yeah!

All: SHHHH!

Squints: Where did your old man get that ball?

Smalls: I don't know. Some lady gave it to him. She even signed her name on it.Some lady named... Ruth. Baby Ruth.

All: *Babe Ruth?*

Smalls: [voiceover] We all lived in the neighborhood for a couple of more years-mostly through junior high school-and every summer was great. But none of them ever came close to that first one. When one guy would move away, we never replaced him on the team with anyone else. We just kept the game going like he was still there.

Benny Rodriguez: Man, this is baseball. You gotta stop thinking. Just have fun. I mean, if you were having fun you would've caught that ball. You ever have a paper route?

Smalls: I helped a guy once.

Benny Rodriguez: Okay, well chuck it like you throw paper. When your arm gets here, just let go. Just let go, it's that easy.

[starts to jog away]

Smalls: How do I catch it.

Benny Rodriguez: Just stand out there and stick your glove out in the air. I'll take care of it.

Smalls: You were all leaving, so I thought I'd hop the...

Squints: If you'da been thinkin you wouldn't 'a thought that.

Smalls: Oh yeah, the Great Bambino. Of course! I thought you said the Great Bambi.

Ham Porter: That wimpy deer?

Smalls: Yeah, I guess. Sorry.

Mom: Honey, I want you to make some friends this summer, lots of them.

Smalls: Yeah, I know. But I'm not good at anything, mom. Face it, I'm just an egghead.