Squints Quotes in The Sandlot (1993)

Smalls: I was gonna put the ball back.

Squints: But it was signed by Babe Ruth!

Smalls: Yeah, you keep telling me that! Who is she?

Ham Porter: WHAT? WHAT?

Kenny: The sultan of swat!

Bertram: The king of crash!

Timmy: The colossus of clout!

Tommy: The colossus of clout!

All: BABE RUTH!

Ham Porter: THE GREAT BAMBINO!

Smalls: Oh my god! You mean that's the same guy?

All: YES!

Benny Rodriguez: Smalls, Babe Ruth is the greatest baseball player that ever lived. People say he was less than a god but more than a man. You know, like Hercules or something. That ball you just aced to The Beast is worth, well, more than your whole life.

Smalls: [Falls to the ground and clutches his stomach, groaning] I don't feel so good.

All: [Fanning Scott with their caps] Give him air, give him air.

Squints: It's about time Benny, my clothes are going out of style.

Yeah Yeah: They already are, Squints.

Squints: Shut up.

Squints: For-ev-ver! For-ev-ver! For-ev-ver! For-ev-ver!

Ham Porter: [mimicking Babe Ruth with a cigar in his mouth; can't understand him] Check this out. I'm the Great Bambino.

Sandlot Kids: What?

Ham Porter: [still can't understand him] I'm the Great Bambino!

Sandlot Kids: What?

Ham Porter: [takes cigar out of mouth] I'm the Great Bambino.

Sandlot Kids: Oh!

Smalls: Who's that?

Smalls: [narrating] I had no idea what they were talking about.

Ham Porter: What did he say?

Bertram: What? Were you born in a barn, man?

Yeah Yeah: Yeah yeah, what planet are you from?

Smalls: [narrating] But there was no *way* I could let them know.

Squints: You've never heard of the sultan of swat?

Kenny: The titan of terror.

Timmy: The colossus of clout!

Tommy: The colossus of clout!

Benny Rodriguez: The king of crash, man.

Smalls: [narrating] So, I lied.

Smalls: Oh! The Great Bambino. Of course. I thought you said the great Bambi.

Ham Porter: That wimpy deer?

Ham Porter: [the kids are being chased away from the pool by the lifeguards after Squints kisses Wendy] Oh, here's your glasses. Did you plan that?

Squints: [puts on his glasses] Of course I did. been planning it for years.

Squints: [Squints is about to tell a story] Quiet! Are you trying to wake it up. It just went to bed!

Smalls: [quite loudly] What just went to bed?

All: SHH!

[whispering]

All: The Beast.

Smalls: [louder] Oh yeah!

All: SHHHH!

Squints: Where did your old man get that ball?

Smalls: I don't know. Some lady gave it to him. She even signed her name on it.Some lady named... Ruth. Baby Ruth.

All: *Babe Ruth?*

Squints: the kid is a L7 weenie.

Yeah Yeah: yeah yeah, Oscar Myer even, footlong, dodger dog, a weenie!

All: ohhh haha

Benny Rodriguez: what are you laughing at Yeah Yeah? you run like a duck!

Yeah Yeah: kay kay, but I'm... I'm...

Benny Rodriguez: Part of the game right?

Yeah Yeah: mmm... Yeah?

Benny Rodriguez: Now how come he don't get to be?

Bertram: hes a geek man

All: he can't catch.

Benny Rodriguez: [looks back at smalls] Man base up you blockheads.

Squints: I've been coming here every summer of my adult life, and every summer there she is oiling and lotioning, lotioning and oiling... smiling. I can't take this no more!

Smalls: You were all leaving, so I thought I'd hop the...

Squints: If you'da been thinkin you wouldn't 'a thought that.

Squints: Come on, Benny. Man. The kid is a...

[with his thumb and index fingers of both hands]

Squints: L, 7, Weenie!

Yeah Yeah: Yeah. Yeah. Oscar Meyer even.

Squints: It's about time Benny, my clothes are goin' outa style.

Yeah Yeah: They already are, Squints.

Squints: Shut up.

Squints: [In the tree house, telling the story of the mutant dog who lives next door] ... after a while the cops started getting calls from people reporting all the missing thieves...