Preston Waters Quotes in Blank Check (1994)

Fred Waters: Here's six bucks. You can have fun all day on that.

Preston Waters: You don't get out much, do you Dad?

Preston Waters: When will I see you again?

Shay Stanley: Why don't you give me a call in, let's say 10 years.

Preston Waters: Five.

Shay Stanley: Seven.

Preston Waters: Six.

Shay Stanley: Okay it's a date.

Sandra Waters: What do you want for your birthday?

Preston Waters: Money so I can pay to have Ralph and Damien knocked off.

Shay Stanley: You know, a million dollars doesn't buy all that much these days.

Preston Waters: You think he should've asked for more?

Shay Stanley: What exactly does Mr. Macintosh do anyway?

Preston Waters: A little of this and a little of that. You know.

Shay Stanley: No I'm afraid I don't. Is he an entrepreneur?

Preston Waters: No, he's American.

Henry: You know what they say about gold.

Preston Waters: He who has the gold makes the rules?

Henry: No, no, no, no, no, no. A fool and his gold are soon parted.

Preston Waters: What does that mean?

Henry: I don't know. It's an old saying, Man. Like, there's more than one way to skin a cat, you hear that one? Who skins cats? Why would you skin a cat? And there is not more than one way to skin a cat, there is only one way! You grab the cat and rip the skin off. What's a number two way? Do you put a hose up the cat's butt and he gets so bloated that he skins himself? Does he have a piece of velcro under his butt there, we just unvelcro him? No.

[Fred Waters is determining how much to fill in the blank check Preston got from Grandma]

Sandra Waters: How much money did you get last year?

Preston Waters: A thousand.

Fred Waters: Ten dollars!

Preston Waters: Wait, Dad, what about inflation?

Fred Waters: Okay, I'll make it eleven.

Henry: Kill two birds with one stone, you heard that one? You know anybody who's actually killed one bird with one stone? Kids try it all the time. You can't hit a bird with a stone unless you have a giant rock and a little baby bird. Well anyway, a fool and his gold are soon parted. I guess that means that if you're a fool and soon your gold is gone and once it's gone, it's outta there, it's dust, it's vapour, it is no more, you are living in Brokesville, unless you have Macintosh's kind of money.

Preston Waters: What if you don't?

Henry: Then I guess you find out who your real friends are.

[looking over the dinner table at Mr. Macintosh's party]

Preston Waters: There was supposed to be ice cream and pizza. What's going on?

Henry: This could've been a pizza, you know, before it was run over by a couple of trucks.

Henry: I'm waiting for a client.

Preston Waters: But I'm your client.

Henry: Right, yeah, and I'm Madonna. Sorry, Kid, the boss doesn't like me taking baseball cards as payment so if you wanna ride in this here limo you need some buckeroos, buckerinis, some moolah, some deniro, some frog skins, much similar to the money... In fact identical to the money you've given me now. I was just kidding about being Madonna. The name's Henry.

Carl Quigley: [observing Preston's castle] So what do you think?

Juice: Looks very nice.

[sees control pad for video game]

Juice: Yo ho, what's that?

Carl Quigley: [picks it up] I don't know. You two never saw one.

[shows it to Biderman\Juice]

Biderman: [shakes head] I have no idea.

Juice: [shrugs] Beats me.

Carl Quigley: Hey, Preston

[showing control pad]

Carl Quigley: What's this?

Preston Waters: [nervous] Well you turn the little knob, and...

[making a short depth movement smashes the control pad against the cement floor. Another suspense sound follows as the thing breaks in two but itsy bitsy pieces go bouncing/rolling off]

Juice: You know kid, you shouldn't have let us in. All your little toys could get broken.

Carl Quigley: [cracks knuckles happily] Kid, where's Macintosh?

Preston Waters: [bumps into Juice who gets distracted by a cute lady]

Juice: YO MAN! Why don't you watch where you're going? How could you mess up a wonderful view for me?

Preston Waters: Sorry.

[tries to get back pack]

Juice: [picks it up but gives it back] What are you doing out of school, yo? You know you should be in school.

Carl Quigley: [knocks on door]

Preston Waters: [runs to it] Henry. I knew you'd come.

[opens it to see Juice, Quiqly, and Biederman, followed by a ghastly suspense sound]

Carl Quigley: Happy birthday little boy. I'm here to blow out your candles!

[the trio forces Preston inside the complex as Carl slams the door and then twists the key in the lock so hard he damages it!]

Preston Waters: [panicking]

Carl Quigley: What's your hurry? Got a big check to cash?

Carl Quigley: Ok, just tell me where my money is?

Preston Waters: I - I spent it.

Carl Quigley: All of it?

Preston Waters: [nods weakly] All of it.

Carl Quigley: How could you spend... a million dollars... in just six days?

Juice: You must have not been shopping lately.