Rusty P. Hayes Quotes in Screwed (2000)

[after Rusty hits the cop over the head with a desk lamp]

Willard Fillmore: What the hell did you do that for?

Rusty P. Hayes: I was scared!

Willard Fillmore: So everytime you're scared you hit a guy over the head with a desk lamp?

Rusty P. Hayes: And that's why you should never trust a black man named Chip!

Rusty P. Hayes: Sweet Jesus! We kidnapped a turd!

Police in Car: Halt! This is the police!

Rusty P. Hayes: Well, no shit!

Rusty P. Hayes: You expect me to believe you were mugged?

Willard Fillmore: Mugged? It was more like a rape!

[silence]

Willard Fillmore: Well... not real rape.