Jay Jansen Quotes in Night of the Demons (1988)

Frannie: [they've just arrived at Hull House] This place used to be a funeral parlor, wasn't it?

Max: Yes. The biggest one of four counties.

Judy Cassidy: A funeral parlor way our here?

Max: Sure, its nice and cozy right next to the old cemetery. And rumor has it that Old Man Hull really loved his clientele. I mean in a carnal sense.

Jay Jansen: That doesn't surprise me. I once saw a portrait of Mrs. Hull.

Frannie: I've heard stories about this place ever since I was a kid. The Hull Family met a pretty gruesome end, didn't they?

Max: Sure did. As a matter of fact it was on Halloween night. One of them went crazy and slaughtered the entire family. Then committed suicide. They could never figure out who did it. Too much blood and guts.

Frannie: I can't believe we're going to party here.

Judy Cassidy: [sighs] Neither can I.

Judy Cassidy: [Jay's body is possessed by a demon now and his eyes gouged out] Oh Jay no!

Jay Jansen: [Possessed] Why has thou forsaken me?

Angela: [Possessed] What's the matter Judy? Don't you like your blind date?

Frannie: Max, what're you doing?

Max: I'm just checking out an old legend about this place, come here! Judy, come here, will ya? Come here, listen.

Judy Cassidy: [uses his stethoscope on the ground by the brick wall sealing off the house] Water!

Max: Yeah, an underground stream. According to legend it completely surrounds the property, this wall was built right on top of it.

Jay Jansen: A brick wall on top of an underground stream? Now there's a stroke of engineering genius.

Max: Well the wall was built to mark the stream, supposedly the evil spirits throughout the land can't cross over running water or something.

Frannie: [entering Hull House, sickened by a rancid odor] Whew! Somebody fired the maid!

Max: Yeah, somebody did. The Hull family maid was killed along with the rest of them. Someone managed to roast her.

Jay Jansen: Great, barbecued maid. No wonder she didn't keep the place clean.

Angela: Those noises we heard, there were three of them, and that awful stink, and then the chill!

Frannie: Well it's not cold now, must've been a draft.

Jay Jansen: Well, maybe somebody did come in.

Helen: The odor's gone too.

Angela: But we ALL experienced them! The noise, the stink, and the chill! They're all signs of demonic infestation.

Frannie: Demonic what?

Stooge: Demonic watchamacallit. I mean come on, ol' Ange here is just trying to put the ooooga booga on us, okay?

Max: Yeah but even before the first white settlers colonized this area, this strip of land already had a bad rep.

Jay Jansen: Sure, Max.

Max: Mm-mm, for centuries the ancient Indian tribes used to live around this area, would NEVER set foot on this side of the underground creek, even back then they said the land was unclean.

Jay Jansen: Right, Max, and I suppose the ghost of an ancient Indian told you that.

Max: No, Mrs. Porter down at the library gave me a book about what the early settlers wrote, you cannot believe all the cool shit that used to go on down here.

Jay Jansen: Yeah, especially since they didn't have any indoor plumbing, right?

Max: No, really. A young brave got lost and settled here with his family by mistake. Anyway, they found him three weeks later, sitting under a tepee he made of his squaw's intestines, and chewing on the leg of his papoose.

Frannie: Oh gross!

Judy Cassidy: I've never heard so many disgusting stories in all my life.