Deputy Virginia Morris Quotes in Moving Violations (1985)

Dana Cannon: [coming into classroom as if he were the instructor] All right people, settle down, take your seats, thank you...

[to kid wearing red shirt]

Dana Cannon: That means you too, Red.

[to black man with dredlocks]

Dana Cannon: Hey man, I've got all your albums, you're the greatest! All right, everybody stand up, please! Everybody up, c'mon!

[to Wink Barnes, who refuses]

Dana Cannon: You! In the back! You waiting for a special invitation?

Wink Barnes: [leaning back in his chair] You talkin' to me?

Dana Cannon: Yes, you too! Uppity-up-up-up!

[he rises]

Dana Cannon: You're gonna like this! C'mon! Now, breathe in...

[class members take deep breath in]

Dana Cannon: ... blow out

[they blow out]

Dana Cannon: . Breathe in, blow out. That's it. Now, shake it out

[all wiggle]

Dana Cannon: Good.

[Deputies Halik and Morris enter]

Dana Cannon: Now, if the women will all be so kind as to take off all their clothes, we can get things rolling.

Deputy Halik: Sit DOWN, Mr. Cannon!

Dana Cannon: Wait, wait. Could it be?

[to camera]

Dana Cannon: How big a coincidence is this?

[singing song]

Dana Cannon: Reunited, 'cause it feels so good!

[class collectively laughs]

Deputy Halik: We're your traffic school instructors!

Dana Cannon: Aren't you guys in the wrong room? Shouldn't you be next door at the pro-acid rain rally?

Deputy Virginia Morris: Sit down before I mold your face into an ashtray.

Dana Cannon: See, all you had to do was ask nicely.

Deputy Virginia Morris: What is this powder?

Dana Cannon: Fertilizer.

Deputy Virginia Morris: [disgustedly spits it out] Ughhhh! Shit!

Dana Cannon: Exactly!

Deputy Halik: I got my promotion.

Deputy Virginia Morris: I got my period.