Papa Elf Quotes in Elf (2003)

[first lines]

Papa Elf: Oh, hello. You're, uh, you're probably here about the story.

[the pages flip to show Papa Elf talking to the camera]

Papa Elf: Elves love to tell stories. I-I'll bet you didn't know that about elves. There's, uh, probably a lot of things you didn't know about elves. Another, another interesting, uh, elfism, uh, there are only three jobs available to an elf. The first is making shoes at night while, you know, while the old cobbler sleeps.

[Cuts to elves doing work on the cobbler's shoes while the cobbler snores with his head on the table]

Disgruntled Cobbler Elf: Lazy bum! Couldn't even make a clog!

Papa Elf: You can bake cookies in a tree.

[Cuts to exterior view of a tree, which bursts into flames]

Papa Elf: As you can imagine, it's, uh, dangerous having an oven in an oak tree during the dry season.

[the elves inside run out screaming]

Tree Elf: I want to make shoes!

Papa Elf: But the third job, some call it, uh, "the show" or "the big dance," it's the profession that every elf aspires to. And that is to build toys in Santa's workshop.

[last lines]

Papa Elf: Come here, little one. Poppy wants to see you.