Oscy Quotes in Summer of '42 (1971)

Oscy: Not even the BEST of friends go halfsies on a rubber

[the three boys are gawking at a medical journal about sex]

Oscy: Now listen! Before I saw these pictures, I didn't think it was possible, either. But these are pictures, Benjie, pictures! These aren't drawings! I've seen those drawings! These are pictures!

Oscy: You use protection. You use a rubber! Haven't you ever heard of a rubber?

Hermie: Yeah, of course, I have.

Oscy: Alright! So, that's what you use. I already have mine. When my brother went into service, he willed it to me. I've been carrying it around with me ever since. Its my lucky charm.

Hermie: Well, how much do you want for it?

Oscy: Hey, its from my brother! It's a family heirloom. You have to get your own. Go to the drug store.

Oscy: Hermie, I'm beginning to think that maybe you're a homo!

Oscy: Go away, Benjie.

Benjie: It's my book.

Hermie: Let him look.

Oscy: There! They're doin' it!

Benjie: I don't believe it.

Oscy: Well, you better believe it! 'Cause one day your turns gonna come and you better know what to do.

Benjie: I don't believe it. My mother and father never did that! Never!

Oscy: Why not?

Benjie: Because it's stupid!

Hermie: No, I hate to break the news to you, Benjie, but that's the way its done.

Oscy: Foreplay! It's called foreplay! Everyone takes off their clothes and they play foreplay. Then he does this. And she does this. And he does this! And before you know it, they're screwin'! Now, what could be simpler than that!

Oscy: Boy, I'd like to feel every one of those girls! You know, I should've tripped on 'em. They'd never know I was getting a feel.

Oscy: Aw, come on, an older woman like that, what's a little feel to her. Come on, did she let you have a feel to her?

Hermie: She gave me some donuts.

Oscy: Boy, I'm tellin' you, I'd like to give her a feel.

Hermie: I thought you were mature, Oscy.

Oscy: Its very mature to feel girls. My brother does it all the time.

Hermie: Then, how come he's a dentist?

Oscy: Hey, catch the boobs on Miriam.

Hermie: You catch 'em.

Oscy: If she throws them, I'll catch 'em. I'll be ready. If those boobs come to me, I'll be there to catch 'em.

Oscy: I'm all excited! I'm going to squeeze the crap out of Miriam, as soon as the lights go out!

Hermie: You're really something! You can't even wait until after the cartoon is over.

Oscy: I can't wait! I can't wait!

Oscy: Listen, tomorrow morning you'll thank me. So, tonight, I'll bring the marshmallows and you bring a rubber.

Oscy: How'd you make out?

Hermie: Pretty good.

Oscy: What'd you do?

Hermie: I held her breasts.

Oscy: You didn't!

Hermie: For almost 11 minutes.

Oscy: Fantastic!

Hermie: Eleven full minutes!

Oscy: You timed it!

Hermie: Yeah. The longest I ever got was 8 minutes with Lila Harrison.

Oscy: So, you broke your record!

Hermie: By 3 minutes!

Hermie: I'm not interested in Aggie!

Oscy: You're not ready for the older lady. I have to sharpen you up on someone else. Aggie's all I got.

Hermie: You know Oscy, you're really crazy!

Oscy: Ya! Crazy! Mad! Wow!

Oscy: Sometimes life is one big pain in the ass.