Marjorie Quotes in Aquamarine (2006)

Marjorie: You're never going to get a tan wearing all of those clothes!

Hailey: Or Skin Cancer.

Patty: Please, we don't even smoke!

Marjorie: Wait a minute. I didn't know you were circumcised, Jack.

Jack: Really? We never covered that at Thanksgiving?

Jack: [coughing] Is there marijuana in there?

Marjorie: Uh-huh, yeah.

Jack: Is that what usually goes in there?

Marjorie: No, it's usually just tobacco, but tobacco is so bad for you.

Clay: Marjorie, why do you look so weird?

Marjorie: 'Cause I'm a lesbian now, asshole.

Gerald: How about pal? Lacrosse? Soccer, maybe? Probably not football 'til you get a little meat on those bones, huh?

Henry: Actually, I was thinking about signup up for the modern dance group.

Gerald: Well, I'm not sure that would be such a good move.

Marjorie: I know how your mother feels about dancing, but... people might get the wrong idea.

Gerald: They might think that you're...

Richard: They might think that you're gay.

Marjorie: Richie!

Henry: Or they might think that I like girls in tights.

Joe: [after his fake story about him and Marjorie to her roommates] Jesus, I'm so sorry that this thing happened today. And I forgive you, Marjorie.

Marjorie: [Marjorie flies into a rage and attacks Joe, seeing the sheath for his knife] What is this? What is this?

Joe: [Pat recoils in horror as Marjorie holds it up to his face] I use it for work. I cut open boxes in the warehouse.

Marjorie: [menacingly] Cut boxes, huh?

[holds it closer to Joe's face]

Marjorie: Cuts them good, huh? It's the kind of knife they use to gut a deer.

[She cuts the phone cord binding his hands and feet together, proving its sharpness]

Patricia: [cautiously] Wait.

Marjorie: [turning on Joe with his own words] Smile.

[Joe trembles]

Marjorie: Smile. Nicer. Don't make your lips tight.

[slaps him hard]

Marjorie: Did I hurt you?

[holds knife to his throat]

Joe: [panicked] Patty, make her stop!

Marjorie: [menacing] Now, kiss me. And tell me you want to make love.

Joe: [frightened] What?

Marjorie: Say it.

[hissing]

Marjorie: Say it.

[strikes him in the face]

Marjorie: Say it.

Marjorie: No talking to the animal!

Marjorie: [Margie plunges knife into chair cushion beneath Joe's crotch] Tell them what happened

[she yanks him to his feet]

Marjorie: or I'll cut them off! Tell them!

[screams]

Marjorie: Tell them! Tell them! Tell them!

Joe: [anguished] I watched the house! I stole the letters!

[he falls to his knees, Marjorie grabs him by the hair and holds his knife to his throat]

Marjorie: And what else?

Joe: [breaking down] I... I came here to kill you... and Patty... and Terry.

[Terry and Patty look on, horrified]

Joe: Linda Martinez, Paula Mikowski, Marie Parks...

[Marjorie runs knife across his throat, Joe screams and falls to floor, sobbing, but realizing he's not hurt]

Joe: Thank you... thank you. The first time I did it... my wife, she's reading the paper. She says 'Joe, did you fix the back door? 'Cause I don't want no raper coming in here.' And I says, 'don't worry honey, he don't want you'. And I fixed the back door real good... so that the raper don't get her. Oh, God.

Patricia: [tears running down her face] Marjorie...

Marjorie: Go get the police.

Terry: [Pat nods] Oh, God.

[to Marjorie]

Terry: I'll stay. I'll stay with you.

Marjorie: [softly] Go with Pat.

Terry: I'm sorry.

[Marjorie nods... they leave... she turns Joe around and guides him back to the fireplace, where he takes a fetal position... she turns on a lamp and sits down near him with a look of triumph on her face... end credits]

Patricia: [kneeling] Marjorie, a man is badly hurt and you don't have a case.

Marjorie: That's why I have a hammer.

Patricia: Okay. Let's talk about the hammer?