Jack Gaines Quotes in Accepted (2006)

Bartleby Gaines: Uh, Dean Lewis why don't you tell them a little bit about the philosophy here at south Harmon?

Uncle Ben: Look, we throw a lot of fancy words in front of these kids in order to attract them to going to school in the belief that they're gonna have a better life, and we know that all were doing is breeding a whole new generation of buyers and sellers, BUYERS AND SELLERS! Pimps and whores, PIMPS AND WHORES! and indoctrinating them into a life long hell of debt and indecision!

Jack Gaines: I... I, I just don't understand...

Uncle Ben: DO I HAVE TO SPOON FEED IT TO YA? look, there's only one reason that kids want to go to school...

Bartleby Gaines: [quietly] Holy shit...

Jack Gaines: [after long pause] ... Which is?

Uncle Ben: ...To get a good job... To get a good job, with a great starting salary.

Jack Gaines: I couldn't agree more.

Diane Gaines: It is so refreshing to have somebody approach education so rationally!

Uncle Ben: Fuckin' A!

Jack Gaines: [on the phone] Tell me what classes you're taking?

Bartleby Gaines: [on the phone] Classes? Right, I'm taking

[sees kids playing craps]

Bartleby Gaines: statistics, and uhh

[sees kids dealing drugs]

Bartleby Gaines: business, and

[sees girl nearly taking her bikini off]

Bartleby Gaines: an... a... tomy...

Jack Gaines, Diane Gaines: [on the phone] Anatomy?

Diane Gaines: Are you huffing?

Bartleby Gaines: Oh god.

Diane Gaines: Are you high?

Jack Gaines: You're huffing grass?

Bartleby Gaines: No I'm not huffing mom I'm not stoned I'm completely fine, infact I'm more clear and level headed than I've ever been.

Jack Gaines: Okay cut the crap Bartleby. Society has rules and the first rule is: You go to college. You wanna have a happy and successful life, you go to college. If you wanna be somebody, you go to college. If you wanna fit in, you go to college.

Bartleby Gaines: Well you know what maybe I didn't get into college!

Diane Gaines: I knew we should've started preparing for college in junior high, like your sister.

Jack Gaines: Now she's got a shot.

Lizzie Gaines: I've got a shot.

Diane Gaines: She's got a shot.

Jack Gaines: Listen, I took another look at that website, what's all this be-what-you-wanna-be-crap?

Bartleby Gaines: Oh no no, dad they just have to say stuff like that just to keep from being sued.

Jack Gaines: Yeah well it sounds like a bunch of crap to me.