Rudy Quotes in The Monster Squad (1987)

Patrick: Rudy, where you going?

Rudy: [cigarette in his mouth, pulling out crossbow] I'm in the goddamn club aren't I ?

Sean: Rudy. Question.

Rudy: Shoot.

Sean: Know any virgins?

Rudy: [spit take]

Rudy: You dropped your candy bar, E.J.

E.J.: It's his.

Rudy: It's yours now.

E.J.: Rudy!

Rudy: Eat.

E.J.: Rudy, I'm not gonna...

Rudy: Eat up! Then we'll call it a day.

Sean: Don't kick the church, it's religious!

Rudy: Locked is what it is!

Sean: Alright then, we'll just have to do it out here.

Horace: Oh REAL religious, Sean, why don't we just do it at Burger King?

Rudy: Where the hell am I supposed to find silver bullets? K-Mart?

Rudy: See? Told ya. Only one way to kill a werewolf.

Rudy: [after ridding the mummy] See ya later, Band-Aid Breath!

Sean: Rudy find some silver bullets.

Rudy: Where the hell am I suppose to find silver bullets?

Sean: I don't know. Fat kid get a map, find Shadowbrook Road.

Horace: What do I look in the index for "big scary mansion?"

[At the treehouse the squad does a team huddle with their hands. Pete, the dog, lifts its paw on top]

Rudy: How does that dog get up here anyway?

Sean: I think there are monsters, like real ones! I heard my dad talking on the phone to a guy down at the police station tonight. There was a guy down there screaming he was a werewolf, and they shot him! And the body disappeared from the coroner van, the coroner guy was dead!

Rudy: So what? He got shot and the werewolf took his body?

Sean: No you bean head! He WAS a werewolf! Maybe

Rudy: Yeah but if they shot him?

Sean: It must've been regular bullets, not silver ones. Look I know this sounds stupid, a mummy disappeared from the museum tonight.

Eugene: Mummy came in my house!

Sean: Guys, Dracula might be here too.

Patrick: Oh man, Fat Kid farted!

Horace: Did not!

Sean: God damn will you guys SHUT UP? Didn't you hear a word I said? These guys are dead, get a clue! Something's out there and it's killing people! And if it's monsters, nobody's going to do a thing about it except us!

Rudy: You created it all so you could become immortal. Why?

Castillo: To live forever!

Rudy: Who's the guy with the Tom Cruise smile and the Rainman brain?

Alicia: What happened? Rudy, what happened?

Rudy: Why does it matter what happened? She's dead. I didn't save her.

Alicia: It's not your fault...

Rudy: It WAS my fault! It was MY fault! Where you here? Did you see it? Did you SEE WATCH them rip her apart?

[after being attacked by Castillo]

Alicia: Isn't it nice to know someone wants you for you body?

Rudy: Yeah. Depending on what they want to do with it.

Rogan: Who are you?

Rudy: Who are YOU?

Rogan: We're here to rescue you.

Rudy: Oh... thanks.

Rogan: What's your name?

Rudy: Rudolph.

Rogan: You got a last name?

Rudy: ...Curien.

Rudy: [as Hugh is playing footage from the zombie attack at the rave] Everyone was partying... you know, drinking, just having fun. Then, these things came and attacked the Rave. Those of us that could get away... did. We ran... we finally got to the boat but it wasn't there. These things just kept coming and coming and killing. We finally got to this house and... tried to hide and that's when you guys came. We thought you were more of them.

Simon: "Them"? Who the hell is "them"?

Rudy: Who? Try "What".

Jordan Casper: Look, I don't know what's going on here, okay? What I do know is that I got to get you all off this island. How did you get here?

Rudy: The boat, like everyone else. But it's gone, it's been destroyed.

Alicia: [Referring to herself, Simon, Karma, Greg, & Cynthia] We didn't. We came on the Lazarus with Kirk.

Jordan Casper: Where is he?

Alicia: At the dock by the beach.

Jordan Casper: Can you take me to him?

Alicia: Why, are you gonna arrest him?

Jordan Casper: Not at the moment. Right now, I need to get you all away from here as soon as possible.

Rudy: [Kirk has just opened up a crate seemingly containing only cigars] You gotta be kidding me.

Alicia: This is why you had Casper on your ass? You're smuggling Cuban cigars?

Capt. Victor Kirk: Among other things...

Jordan Casper: [Casper enters] Still hard-at-work smuggling I see, Victor.

Capt. Victor Kirk: Don't you just wish you could prove that, Jordan?

Jordan Casper: What are these, then?

Capt. Victor Kirk: [Lying] Well, funny thing is we just found them laying on the beach. Crazy, huh?

Rudy: Mom, Mom! Please, you are so weird, don't do this to me.

Rudy: There's something I can't figure out...

Gloria Davis: What's that?

Rudy: I don't know.

Rudy: Why'd you kill her you bastard?!

Mike Logan: Get off my case motherfucker!

Rudy: What a wasted vacation.

Gloria Davis: And maybe our lives too.

Rudy: Yeah...

Rudy: [Referring to his ex-wife] You know what you are? You're like a gas leak. We don't see, we don't smell you, and your silently killing us all.

Sharon: [at the front door] He's damaged, he has no place else to go. He's been livin' in my house for two years.

Joy: Oh, Dad, I'm so sorry.

Rudy: Yeah...

Joy: But, ya know, Tony's livin' in the basement.

Rudy: Your ex-husband shouldn't be livin' in your basement, that's not the proper way to be divorced.

Rudy: I'm half wop, I'm half nigger. I'm not afraid of nobody.

Father Cavanaugh: [in church] Taking your appeal to a higher authority?

Rudy: I'm desperate. If I don't get in next semester, it's over. Notre Dame doesn't accept senior transfers.

Father Cavanaugh: Well, you've done a hell of a job kid, chasing down your dream.

Rudy: Who cares what kind of job I did if it doesn't produce results? It doesn't mean anything.

Father Cavanaugh: I think you'll find that it will.

Rudy: Maybe I haven't prayed enough.

Father Cavanaugh: I don't think that's the problem. Praying is something we do in our time, the answers come in God's time.

Rudy: If I've done everything I possibly can, can you help me?

Father Cavanaugh: Son, in thirty-five years of religious study, I've come up with only two hard, incontrovertible facts; there is a God, and, I'm not Him.

Steele: Rudy,are you ready for this, champ?

Rudy: I've been ready for this my whole life!

Steele: Then you take us out on the field.

Rudy: We're gonna go inside, we're gonna go outside, inside and outside. We're gonna get 'em on the run boys and once we get 'em on the run we're gonna keep 'em on the run. And then we're gonna go go go go go go and we're not gonna stop til we get across that goalline. This is a team they say is... is good, well I think we're better than them. They can't lick us, so what do you say men?

Rudy: Coach I just wanted to thank you for letting be a part of this football program this year.

Ara Parseghian: Rudy, I never I thought I'd be saying this but it's been an honor.

Rudy: But I've come to realize that God made some people out to be football players and that I'm not one of them.

Ara Parseghian: I wish God would put your heart in some of my players bodies.

Rudy: [laughs] Yea, I have this wish to let my father watch one of his sons play football for the Irish and I was wondering if I could possibly dress for one game next season?

Ara Parseghian: Rudy the NCAA is really strict with this 60 player rule, and in some positions we only have one backup and you know that every year we are competing for the national championship. Is this wish just for your father?

Rudy: No its for everyone who told me that being a Norte Dame Football player would be impossible. My brothers, the guys I work with at the mill they can't come to practice and see that I am a part of this team.

Ara Parseghian: [sighs] OK.

Rudy: OK?

Ara Parseghian: You deserve it. You will dress for one game next season.

Rudy: [can barely hold in his excitement] Thank You Coach!

Fortune: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey what are you doing here don't you have pratice?

Rudy: Not anymore I quit.

Fortune: Oh, well since when are you the quitting kind?

Rudy: I don't know I just don't see the point anymore.

Fortune: So you didn't make the dress list, there are greater tragies in the world.

Rudy: I wanted to run out of that Tunnell for my dad to prove to everyone that I worked...

Fortune: PROVE WHAT?

Rudy: That I was somebody.

Fortune: Oh you are so full of crap. Your five foot nothin', a hundred and nothin' and hardly have a spec of athletic ability and you hung in with the best college football team in the land for two years, and you were also going to walk out of here with a degree from the University of Norte Dame in this life time you don't have to prove nothing to nobody except yourself and after what you gone through if you haven't done that by now, it aint gonna never happen, now go on back.

Rudy: I'm sorry I never got you to see your first game in here.

Fortune: Hell I've seen too many games in this Stadium.

Rudy: I thought you said you never saw a game...

Fortune: I've never seen a game from the stands.

Rudy: You were a player?

Fortune: I rode the Bench for two years thought I wasn't being played because of my color I got filled up with a lot of attitude so I quit, still not a week goes by I don't regret it, and I guarantee a week won't go by in your life you won't regret walking out letting them get the best of you. Do you hear me clear enough?

Rudy: Who cares how much effort I put in, if it doesnt produce any results.

Rudy: Mary, Mary quite contrary. What makes your garden grow?

Rudy: You're the only one who ever took me seriously, Pete.

Rudy: This entire year's been a waste! I've just blown another year of eligibility!

Frank: Ara again? You gonna get an autographed picture and kiss it every night before you go to bed?

Rudy: What is your problem?

Frank: Or maybe he'll give you permission to wipe his ass.

D-Bob: Are you learning stenography or something? Everything he's mouthing is in the goddamn book.

Rudy: I gotta make an 'A' in this class.

D-Bob: Just remember "Sitz im Leben" and it shouldn't be a problem.

[Rudy sneaks into Notre Dame Stadium]

Fortune: Hey kid! You're not supposed to be here!

Rudy: Hey this place is really somethin else huh? Someday I'm gonna come out of that tunnel and I'm gonna run onto this field

Fortune: Well it ain't gonna be this day...

Rudy: I'm here to play football for the Irish!

Fortune: Coach Parseghian know about it?

Rudy: No... not yet.

Fortune: Well maybe you best tell him first...

Mateus: [at practice, Rudy remains on the ground after being pummeled on a block by Mateus] Hey, little buddy, you all right?

Coach Yonto: Ruettiger, get out!

Rudy: [springs up, refusing to be taken out] I can do it, coach!

Rudy: [play is run again, but Mateus refuses to block Rudy. Rudy confronts Mateus loudly] What are you doing? I'm playing defense for Purdue!

Coach Yonto: Mateus!

[grabs his facemask]

Coach Yonto: You ain't here to be no nanny in no kindergarten!

Rudy: Don't I know you?

Mateus: Hey man, I just want to say sorry about what I said at practice.

Rudy: Don't be sorry.

Mateus: Do you understand that if you don't cool it out there you're going to get yourself killed?

Rudy: If I cool it out there, then I won't be helping you guys win next week's game. Got it?

Mateus: Yeah, I got it.

Jamie O'Hara: He's just a showboat, man. That's all he's about.

Steele: Relax, Jamie, he's just doing his job.

Ludwig van Beethoven: And now this woman is sent to me at this very moment. What if she was sent by HIM?

Rudy: Women are usually sent by the other one.

Ludwig van Beethoven: Well, suppose it's a sign?

Rudy: A sign for what, Louis?

Ludwig van Beethoven: That it's time.

Rudy: A time for what?

Ludwig van Beethoven: A time for me to join with HIM.

Rudy: Well, if it's true and she was sent by HIM, and she's waiting in your apartment, you shouldn't be sitting here drinking, should you?

Rudy: I saw you dancing with Roxanne.

Tripper: Oh yeah? Well, she sort'a cornered me and there was nothing I could do without embarrassing her.

Rudy: Do you like her?

Tripper: Well I feel sorry for her, you know. She's got a glass eye. And, uh, I'm one of the few people who knows exactly which eye to look at when they're talking to her, so she's sort of fixated on me.

Rudy: Well, I like her.

Tripper: Well you're not exactly known for your taste. I'll probably just use her for the rest of the summer and then throw her on the scrap heap with all the rest of the women that I've destroyed.

Tripper: I'm takin' the C.I.T.s on an overnight for the next couple days so you're gonna have to do your own training, son. I want you to run two miles today and two and a half tomorrow.

Rudy: I've never run that far.

Tripper: Neither have I but somebody's gotta do it. I can't be expected to do it. Somebody's gotta do it, and it can't be me. Because I'm too busy. I've responsibilities. I'm the entertainment director for the overnight.

[Holds up a bottle of wine]

Rudy: I'm going away.

Tripper: You goin' to Vegas? If you're going to Vegas, I would be up for it because I love that town. I'm a party guy. I love that town.

Rudy: I don't think they want me around.

Tripper: You talkin' about the soccer heads back there?

Tripper: Well, that's life in the fast-paced slam-bang, live-on-the-razor's-edge, laugh-in-the-face-of-death world of junior league soccer.

Hotel Manager: Just where do you think you are?

Jay O'Neill: The Library of Congress?

Rudy: Detroit?

Brad: Beyond the sun?

Rudy: Let's have a bachelor party with chicks and guns and fire trucks and hookers and drugs and booze!

Gary: Yeah! Yeah yeah! All the things that make life worth living for!

Rick Gassko: [the guys find out their porno film has been edited] Not that I'm complaining, but I usually don't like my filth this clean!

Rudy: Whatta waste of two women!

Jay O'Neill: I don't get it; the dirty parts were there yesterday!

Rudy: [toasting] To girls with big tits!

Rudy: Smooth moove, Ajax.

Rudy: You're like school on Saturday: no class.

Bill: Look!

[Bill, Fat Albert, Dumb Donald, Bucky, Rudy, Mushmouth and Old Weird Harold run across a street and look at a poster in a video store window which reads: "Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids! Own the complete collection on DVD!"]

Bill: See? THAT'S who we are.

Rudy: Yeah, and we're coming out on "divda."

Bucky: What's "divda?"

Dumb Donald: I don't know.

Bucky: I...

Bill: Don't start! We don't belong here.

Poster in Video Store window: Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids! Coming soon on DVD.

Bill: Look. *That's* who we are.

Rudy: Yeah, and it says we're coming out on dividee.

Bucky: What's dividee

Dumb Donald: I don't know.

Bucky: I know you don't know, I wasn't talking to you.

Dumb Donald: I wasn't talking to you.

Bill: Guys, cut it out.

Rudy: You people... stay out of our way. You may ski on zat side OR on zat side, but stay out of zee meedle!

Dan O'Callahan: Hey, Rudy, you can kiss my ass. Not on zis side and not on zat side, but right in zee meedle!

Rudy: Do you know what I had for breakfast this morning rookie? How do you say... I had Sonny side up, und I had Sonny side down, und I had Sonny side all ze vay around.

Rudy: You people. How many times must I tell you? You may ski on zat side of ze hill *or* on zat side of ze hill, but stay out of ze meedle here!

Dan O'Callahan: Hey, Rudy! You can kiss my ass! Not on zis side and not on zat side, but right in ze meedle!

Squirrel Murphy: Hey, Garnshit!

Rudy: [correcting him] Garmisch.

Squirrel Murphy: Yeah, Garnshit.

Race Official: [at the top of the ski jump] What's your jump?

Rudy: [growls] A lay-tuck-tuck triple.

Race Official: [into his walkie talkie] I got Garmish up here... he's gonna throw a triple.

Rudy: [growls louder] A lay-tuck-tuck triple!

Race Official: [smirks] Whenever you're ready.

Rudy: [skiis off]

Rudy: C'mon Jeff! You've seen how bad business is. Thanks to Fuchs, our name is mud! Look... we had nuns, protesting out front when I got here this morning.

Jeff: Nuns?

Rudy: Yeah. I had to have Jim turn the firehose on them.

Big Jim: [holds up the still wet firehose] And I knocked them motherfuckers right on they asses, too.

Rudy: Charlie, I broke my back getting you this deal. You know that...

Charlie: Fifty bucks never killed anybody.

Rudy: [pressing] You're not going to find another deal like this anywhere in town.

Charlie: Fifty bucks never killed anybody.

Rudy: [pleading] We shook hands on this... a deal's a deal.

Charlie: Fifty bucks never...

Rudy: [throws up his hands in mock disgust] Okay Charlie, you got it, you win - I'll see what I can do... But I'm telling ya, my boss sees these figures, he's going to have a stroke.

[exits]

Charlie: [scoffs] What's he trying to pull? Fifty bucks never killed anybody.

Charlie: [Luke bursts in, red face and clutching his chest - Charlie panics] Okay, it's a deal, it's a deal! I'll sign! I'll sign!

Rudy: So. Roy L... What can I do you for?

Roy L. Fuchs: Uhhh... I'd like to talk to my brother.

Rudy: Well, you're gonna have to talk kinda loud. He left for Miami late last night.

Roy L. Fuchs: Miami?

Rudy: Yeah. Miami Beach.

Roy L. Fuchs: Miami Beach?

Jeff: Florida.

Roy L. Fuchs: I know where the fuck Miami Beach is, dummy.

[repeated line]

Rudy: Trust me.

[Rudy and Big Jim are watching Barbara's commercial, which has been doctored]

Barbara Jane Fuchs: Come down and see the, uh, mile of cars we have on our lot.

Rudy: Did she just say "mile of cars"? She said she had a "mile of cars".

Big Jim: That's the most blatant claim of false advertising I ever heard in my life...

Rudy: Come on down to New Deal used cars...

Margaret: AAAAAAAHHHH!

Rudy: ...come on down and squeeze on us!

Rudy: Margaret, let's take a look under the hood, shall we?

Margaret: WHAT!

[Rudy is planning to break into a presidential broadcast with a commercial]

Jeff: For Christ's sake, we're fuckin' with the President of the United States.

Rudy: He fucks with us, doesn't he?

Luke Fuchs: $10,000. Is that all it takes to be elected senator these days.

Rudy: Well, that's more like a down payment. After I'm elected its 50-50 on all the graft I take.

Rudy: Hey, morning, Roy!

[Roy reacts by spitting on a car, and wiping it off]

Rudy: [to himself] Same to you, asshole.

[Rudy puts a bumper sticker of himself on a newly-bought car]

Rudy: You're going to love it, Stan. Trust me.

[the car drives off as the bumper falls off the car]

Rudy: Ah, shit! There goes a perfectly good bumper sticker.

Rudy: Luke told me that if you came around here to have you arrested for trespassing. Now, are you going to leave, or are we going to have to call the cops?

Jeff: Yeah, do we have to call the cops?

Roy L. Fuchs: What are you, a fucking parrot?

Sam Slaton: Come on, Roy. Let's go.

Roy L. Fuchs: Suck-ass son of a bitch.

[Rudy notices that some paint has washed off Manuel's cars]

Rudy: Manuei! What the hell are you using; water based paint?

Manuel: Sure. How much rain do we get around here anyway? If you don't like these, I'll get you some others. Here is my inventory.

Rudy: Manuel, this is a picture of 250 cars. I can't make a deal on a picture. Take these around back and I'll think of something.

[First lines]

Rudy: Oww, fuck!

Rudy: [after unsuccessfully trying to sell a kid a bicycle] Real grinders... tougher to close than their parents!

Jeff: [Talking about the explanation for Luke's sudden disappearance] No-one's going to believe he went to Miami, nobody goes to Miami!

Rudy: OLD people go to Miami, he's old isn't he? Where do you want him to go, Aspen?

Jeff: [looking at the '59 Edsel] Aspen? Fuck Aspen, this crate won't go around the block...

Jim the Mechanic: The fuck it won't! This motherfucker runs!

Big Jim: I don't know Rudy. I ain't never sold no damn cars before.

Rudy: It's easy Jim. All you have to do is get them in that car. Nothing sells a car better than a car itself. Now remember this you have to get their confidence, get their friendship, get their trust. Then get their money.

[Rudy wants to marry Casey]

Rudy: Sure, we'll have our problems, just like most young couples.

Arlo Pear: You're gonna have a problem walking straight if you don't take your hands off my daughter.

Hank Goody: Who's my date for the fight tonight, Rudy? I can't keep track of these things.

Rudy: Your wife.

Hank Goody: [Looks slightly confused] My wife?

Rudy: Yeah. You know, there's a lot of cameras there tonight. I figured your wife would be a good call.

Hank Goody: [Gives it some thought] My wife... You're right. Good call.

Rudy: If you want to be cool, first you pull your headband into the cool position. then you just lean back, put this hand in your pocket and then you wave this hand behind you like you just cut one and your trying to shoo away the stinch.

Rudy: Hey Man, whaaas sappening?

Rudy: Hey Miester! I like your sister.

Immigration officer: Where were you born?

Rudy: What?

Immigration officer: Read my lips, El Paco. Where were you born?

Rudy: I was born in East L.A., man.

Immigration officer: Sure, sure. If you were born in East L.A., then who's the president of the United States?

Rudy: I-I don't know, that guy, that guy who was on T.V., the guy in the cowboy hat... he used to be on "Death Valley Days"... uh, John Wayne!

Immigration officer: Get him out of here.

Rudy: The president of the United States is Ronald "dickhead" Reagan!

Rudy: What are you guys in for?

Thug #1: The good times.

Marcie: When will my black Pugeot be ready!

Rudy: Black Pugeot? I knew you wasn't a natural redhead!

Rio: [Surprising Devon] How's it goin, fart head?

McNally: Mister big shot with the Cops, huh?

Devon: Don't You morons have anything else better to do?

Devon: [Rio throws jacket on the ground] What'd You that for?

Rio: Cause You called Me a moron!

Devon: So throwing your jacket on the ground makes You smarter?

Rio: This Kid's driving Me nuts!

Devon: [Looking at Vinnies Car, then giving the two Bullies a serious look] You know guys, I can't kid around anymore, I gotta watch over My Grandmas Car...

McNally: Ohhh, so you're Here with Grandma?

Rio: Ah, so this is Grandmammys Car?

Devon: Guys, please, bust Me up, but not the Car, please!

Rio: You mean... don't do this?

[Smashes a pair of headlights]

Devon: [Backing up a step] That's exactly what I mean!

Rio: ...or this?

[Smashes the other pair of headlights, and denting the side]

Rio: [Devon starts backing up more and hides behind a Telephone Pole across the Street]

McNally: [Takes the Bat] My turn... this is your kiss...

[kisses the windshield]

McNally: ... goodbye!

[smashes the windshield, and and adds more dents to the side]

Chu: [Seeing the two Boys smashing up their Car] Hey, whoa, what do You think you're doin?

Rudy: Yeah, what do You think you're doin, huh?

[Chu kicks one of the two bullies who run off in fear]

Rudy: ...and if we ever find out where ya live we'll break your stupid necks!

Chu: [Looking at the broken windshield] Look at this... LOOK at this, oh, these punks got no respect nowadays, c'mon, get in the car!

Nick: [chasing some bad guys with his car] I told you, I'm not getting out of this car. I hate to run!

Chu: Whoa!

[slips and falls down, McKenna comes right after him with his car]

Chu: What are you a nut? Oh! Oh!

Chu: I warned you!

[smacks him with car door]

Raymond Sanchez: [seeing this] Do all cops do that?

Devon: [grinning] Only the best.

Nick: [now going after Quintero] Quintero! Who do you think is going to run out of gas first?

Chu: Ooh.

[a black car arrives to him]

Rudy: Chu, get in!

[He gets in the car]

[Chu and Rudy are carrying Devon]

Devon: Put me down, you oink-oink!

[kicking Rudy]

Chu: Rudy, what are you doing? Over here.

[He sees Mr. Fountain in the drug area]

Chu: The drug lab is over there.

Devon: I knew it was drugs.

Vinnie Fountain: I'm sure... Did I say to keep him in the office?

Chu: He was a bad boy, boss.

Rudy: He called me piggy.

Vinnie Fountain: I like that.

Chu: Well, sir, they got a witness.

Vinnie Fountain: And what did this witness *witness*?

Chu: It's just some kid. But we know where he lives.

Rudy: How much could a little kid see?

Chu, Rudy, Waldo: [they all start to laugh]

Vinnie Fountain: [not amused] I was a little kid once myself and I saw EVERYTHING.

Rio: Hey, how you doing, farthead?

McNally: Mr. big shot with the cops, huh?

Devon: Don't you morons have anything else to do?

[Rio throws his jacket on the ground]

Devon: What'd you do that for?

Rio: Because, you called me a moron.

Devon: So, throwing your jacket on the ground makes you smarter?

McNally: This kid's making me nuts.

Devon: [Looking at Vinnie's car, then giving the two bullies a serious look] Hey, guys. I can't kid around anymore, I'm watching my grandma's car.

McNally: Oh, so you're here with grandma?

Devon: [nods] Mm-hmm.

Rio: Oh. So this is grandmommy's car, huh?

Devon: Guys, please. Bust me up. But, not the car, please.

Rio: You mean, don't do this?

[smashes a left pair of headlights]

Devon: [backing up a step] That's exactly what I mean.

Rio: Or this?

[smashes a right pair of headlights]

Rio: Aww, too bad.

[Devon starts backing up more and hides behind a Telephone Pole across the Street]

McNally: [chuckles, takes the bat] My turn... This is your kiss... Goodbye!

[kisses a windshield and smashes the windshield and adds more dents to the side, laughs. Suddenly, Chu and Rudy gets out of the store and seeing the two bullies smashing up their car]

Chu: WHOA! Hey, wha... What are you doing?

Rudy: Get out of here, boys!

Chu: [kicks one of the two bullies who run off in fear] I'll break your face!

Rudy: I'm gonna get my hands on you!

Chu: That's what you are! If we find out where you at!

Rudy: We will get you, stupid little brats!

Chu: [to Rudy] Let's get back in the car. Come on, let's go.

[seeing a broken windshield]

Chu: Awww, look at this! Oh, man. These punks got no respect nowadays. Get in the car.

Rudy: Mr. Brigante, there is a problem with Mr. Kleinfeld.

Carlito: What kind of problem?

Rudy: He's in the bathroom fucking Steffie!

Pachanga: [bursts out laughing]

Carlito: So? What's the problem? Good for him!

Rudy: Carlito, Mr. Benny Blanco says it's gonna be okay. He wants to send a bottle of champagne over, and he wants you to send Steffie over, when you're ready.

Steffie: Carlito, what should I do?

Carlito: No problem, Steffie.

[to Rudy]

Carlito: Steffie's with Dave now.

Rudy: But Benny said...

Carlito: Fuck Benny!

Waiter: Carlito, this is from Benny Blanco.

Carlito: Send it back!

Saso: [to the waiter] Vete! Vete!

Saso: [to Carlito] Charlie, please, you can't do this. Benny Blanco spends a lot of money here.

Carlito: Oh, he's a nickel-bagger. Come on.

Saso: What happened to you? What are you acting like this for? It doesn't make sense you should hate this guy. Because this guy is you 20 years ago.

Rudy: You're not kissing me. You're just lying there like you want me to rape you!

Arden: Okay.

Rudy: What, you want me to rape you?

Arden: I'll kiss you.

Rudy: And take the gloves off.

Terry: Put on your seat belt.

Rudy: It pushes on my neck.

Terry: What?

Rudy: It pushes on my neck, it's uncomfortable.

Terry: Well, when someone slams into us and you go sailing through the windshield, that's liable to be uncomfortable, too. Now, put on a seat belt.

Rudy: Who are you talking about?

Terry: Some wild kids we used to know.

Rudy: Were you a wild kid?

Terry: Not as wild as your mom.

Rudy: Yeah, right...

Terry: Oh, you don't believe me?

Rudy: No.

Terry: Ask her.

Rudy: Mom, were you?

Sammy: [long pause] No comment.

Terry: You mind if I ask you a personal question?

Rudy: I don't know.

Terry: Do you like it here, I mean in Scottsville?

Rudy: Yeah.

Terry: Why?

Rudy: I don't know, my friends are here, I like the scenery... I don't know.

Terry: I know, I know, it's just so... there's nothing to do here.

Rudy: Yes, there is.

Terry: No, there isn't, man. It's narrow. It's dull. It's a dull, narrow town full of dull, narrow people who don't know anything except what things are like right around here. They have no perspective whatsoever, no scope. They might as well be living in the 19th century 'cause they have no idea what's going on, and if you try and tell 'em that they wanna fucking kill you.

Rudy: What are you talking about?

Terry: I have no idea... you're a good kid.

Sammy: What is happening here?

Terry: It's just the problem is the pipes are corroded the whole length of the hall, so every time I put a new piece in it starts leaking further down.

Sammy: Why don't I just call the plumber?

Terry: Why? He's not gonna do anything different than what I'm doing.

Rudy: Yeah, we're only making it worse.

Terry: No we're not, shut up!

[Terry pulls a pipe out of the floor and accidentally sprays Sammy with water]

Sammy: Thanks. Thank you.

Rudy: Why are you smoking?

Terry: Um, because it's bad, don't ever do it.

Sammy: So, how was school today?

Rudy: Stupid.

Rudy: [as Terry is packing up] Where are you going?

Terry: I don't know. I just want to get out of this town. And if you've got any sense when you get old enough you'll get out of here too. Your Mom's gonna live in this town for the rest of her life, and you know why? Because she thinks she has to. Don't ask me why, but that's the truth. She thinks there's all these things she has to do, but you want to know one thing about your Mom? She's a bigger fuck-up than I ever was. I mean, I know I messed up. You think I enjoy getting thrown in jail because I wanted you to face that prick your Dad like a little man and see what kind of a guy he is? I know I got a little carried away, and I lost my temper just a little bit - which is not the end of the world either, by the way, just for future reference - And now she's kickin' me out of my own house because - you know, because I fucked up a little bit. Which I totally admit. I was like - totally ready to admit that.

Rudy: Doc says I got cancer. First thing I ever got.

Francis Phelan: [regarding Sandra] She a bum, or just a plain drunk?

Rudy: She's been a bum all her life.

Francis Phelan: [chuckles] No, nobody... 'been a bum all her life'. She had to be somethin' else before she was a bum.

Rudy: You know somebody that's buried up there?

Francis Phelan: Yeah, a little kid.

Rudy: Little kid? What'd he do, die young?

Francis Phelan: Pretty young, yeah.

Rudy: What happened?

Francis Phelan: He fell.

Rudy: Fell where?

Francis Phelan: On the floor.

Rudy: Fell on the floor? I fall on the floor about twice a day. I ain't dead yet.

Rudy: You know why people call you a bum? Because it makes them feel better when they say it.

Francis Phelan: Well, the truth can't hurt you. If you're a bum, you're a bum.

Rudy: Our birthday comes once a year and you ask for a hockey mask. You don't even play.

Jacob: Jason from Friday the 13th wears one. He's bad-ass.

Leonard Fisher: Why were you saving piss?

Rudy: Just in case. Pretty smart, huh?

Rudy: Get a dog.

Herman: I never had a dog. I wouldn't know what to do with it.

[last lines]

Rudy: You've been so close. So many times. So close.

Rudy: Who among us knows the way of the Lord?

Seth: I have a theory. He's a raving psychotic.