Mr. Simms Quotes in The Wedding Singer (1998)

[at a job interview for a bank]

Mr. Simms: Do you have any experience?

Robbie: No, sir, I have no experience but I'm a big fan of money. I like it, I use it, I have a little. I keep it in a jar on top of my refrigerator. I'd like to put more in that jar. That's where you come in.

Ball: What you sayin'? We dead, motherfucker?

Mr. Simms: VERY!

Bulldog: Motherfucker bullshit! If we dead then what we doin' in a funeral home with your crazy ass?

Mr. Simms: This ain't no funeral home! It ain't the Terror Dome, neither! Welcome to Hell, motherfuckers!

Mr. Simms: After you killed Crazy K, a few of his boys killed you! I guess you didn't make it!

Mr. Simms: I'll tell you about Clarence here along the way - unless, of course, you're scared.

Mr. Simms: Death... it comes in many strange packages.

Mr. Simms: Don't worry. You'll get the shit. You'll be knee-deep in the shit. I've got it hid. There's so much... I couldn't even lift it all myself.

Mr. Simms: Oh, I must say, I don't think you can reform those types. No - you just kill them.

Mr. Simms: I have some iodine in the lab.

Stack: Hey, man! I don't need nothing from no house of dead folks! Besides, I ain't no baby!

Mr. Simms: Of course you're not.

Ball: Sure looked like one when that door swung open!

Mr. Simms: It's here, in the coffins! WHERE ELSE would I hide it?

Mr. Simms: [after telling Crazy K's story] You see, those types can't be rehabilitated... you just kill them.