Gracie Barzini Quotes in Mixed Nuts (1994)

Felix: Look what I got for you!

[takes out a piece of paper]

Felix: This means that we can have the baby in a hospital for free! All we have to do is swear that we're completely broke and have absolutely no way of supporting ourselves and never will.

Gracie Barzini: Oh God! Felix, I don't want to hurt your feelings, but...

Felix: Honey, you are the only person in my whole life who has never hurt my feelings.

Gracie Barzini: ...you're a loser.

Gracie Barzini: [grabs Felix's gun] Now, we have to empty it.

[She starts firing gun randomly around the walls and door]

Philip: [Struggles to grab the gun] Gracie, for God's sake!

Gracie Barzini: I AM EMPTYING IT! I AM SICK OF HIM! I AM PROTECTING US FROM HIM!

Mrs. Munchnik: [Door bell rings,hysterically yelling at the door] Are you the Seaside Strangler? Well listen here Mr. Seaside Strangler. I *am* calling the police. I am getting the reward and you will go to a maximum security prison where a very large, hairy man is going to make you his girlfriend.

[calms down]

Mrs. Munchnik: I am not your type. I am short and my hair is short. I am attractive; I suppose I do fit that part of the description

[yelling again]

Mrs. Munchnik: But I am *not* young! I have never been young!

[calmly]

Mrs. Munchnik: Although, I do look considerably...

Gracie Barzini: [approaches Mrs. Munchnik] Would you knock it off? What would the Seaside Strangler want with you? You're having a fantasy.