Coop Quotes in The Fan (1996)

[Gil swings the bat to Coop's face, hitting him again in the head when he's down]

Gil Renard: We could've been teammates. We were teammates, man. We could've made it to the Bigs.

Coop: [Coop bloody from the ground] It was Little League. We were 12 years old.

[as Gil raises the bat up in complete rage, swinging it to Coop's head]

[Gil tells Coop he's surprised he didn't move up in the baseball ranks]

Gil Renard: I always thought you'd be managing by now, Coop?

Coop: Managing?

Gil Renard: Yeah, in the Majors.

Coop: No one calls me Coop anymore, you sick son of a bitch.

[Coop gets nervous after Gil makes that threatening phone call to Bobby]

Coop: You're getting some serious shit for that. Cops are gonna be all over us.

Gil Renard: Boy, all of a sudden you lost your sense of humor.

Susie: You guys, I'm really going to miss this place.

Coop: Me too.

Ben: Hey, let's all promise that in ten years from today, we'll meet again, and we'll see what kind of people we've blossomed into.

Susie: Yeah!

Ben: What time do you wanna meet?

J.J.: You mean ten years from now?

Coop: Let's meet in the morning so we can make a day of it.

Susie: Okay, so what is it? Is it like 9:00? 9:30?

Coop: Well, let's say 9:00, that way we can be here by 9:30.

McKinley: Well, no, why don't we say 9:30, and then make it your beeswax to be here by 9:30? I mean, we'll all be in our late 20s by then. I just don't see any reason why we can't be places on time.

Gary: Okay, then, it's settled. 9:30 it is. All agreed?

Together: Agreed.

McKinley: Good, because I have something at 11:00.

Gary: You just have like a trapper-keeper full of appointments, right?

McKinley: No, I just have something at 11:00, and I can't change it, because I already moved it twice.

Coop: When we first started hanging out together, this morning, we were just friends; but things change, and I've fallen in love with you. I just know that if you gave me a chance, I could make you feel so good. So I am coming, not as your buddy, and not as a co-counselor, but for the first time as a man - a man who loves a woman, and who wants to hold her and provide for her and, yes, have sex with her; but no, seriously, Katie, I love the way you laugh and I love the way your hair smells and I love it that sometimes for no reason you're late for shul, and I don't care that you're bowlegged and I don't care that you're bilingual - all I know is that I would have said no to every single person on your list because I've always wanted you.

[Coop is sobbing, Gene appears from nowhere]

Gene: Be proud of who you are.

Coop: Huh? Gene?

Gene: Shh... it isn't about the girl, Coop.

Coop: It isn't?

Gene: Well, it is. But see if you can follow me here... it

[long pause]

Gene: ... isn't.

Coop: Oh. So it is... and it isn't.

[pause, wind blows]

Gene: You are ready to be taught the new way.

Coop: Will you teach me about this - what is it? A new way?

[bird calls]

Coop: I love sluts! Sluts rock! It's just, you know, it's just gotta be the right slut, you know?

Coop: [as Katie walks away] I want you inside me.

Katie: What did you say?

Coop: Oh hey... from before...

Luce: [surprised] Coop!

Coop: It is you, isn't it?

Luce: What are you talking about?

Coop: I wasn't sure when he told me, but I knew.

Luce: What did he say?

Coop: Tell me it isn't true, girl!

[pause]

Coop: Dumb slut!

Luce: Don't start, Coop.

Coop: Don't start? Her husband. Her flippin' husband calls me in the middle of the night. And you want to know how he was? He was busted.

Luce: Coop, just get out!

Coop: What was that you said? What was that? 'Never wreck another couple.'

[Luce looks guilty]

Coop: Stuck to that one good, didn't you?

Coop: Fuck me if I'm wrong, but I think you want to kiss me.

Luce: It's not going to happen.

Coop: Later on tonight, we're going to fall madly in bed.

Coop: I'm 29 years old.

Heck: You're 31.

Coop: Precisely my point. I'm getting older. And I see you... I see what you've got with... I can see that stability. And the trust, and permanence. And I think... God, I'm glad I'm not you.

Coop: [Standing at the altar with Heck] I fancy that flower girl.

Heck: [Craning around to see if Rachel's coming] Yeah, yeah, I know you do.

Coop: She likes me, right? I got a vibe that she likes me.

Heck: Coop, it's my wedding day. Can we talk about me?

Coop: Sure, yes.

[Turns with Heck to see if Rachel's coming. Waits a few seconds, then whispers]

Coop: Did you get the vibe that she likes me?

Coop: I am a cure for lesbianism.

[standing at the front door]

Coop: It's Coop and Remer.

Douglas "Swish" Reemer: We graduated with Britney.

Dr. Kaiser: You graduated?

Coop: Of course we graduated, cock - Beer?

[in the house]

Douglas "Swish" Reemer: Man this place looks like a Dockers commercial.

Coop: Oh hey, Stef!

Stephanie: Coop! Remer!

Coop: You wanna beer?

Stephanie: Oh, my God, you guys haven't changed since High School!

Coop: Oh, cool.

Stephanie: No, it isn't.

Coop: Cock. Hey, Skidmark Steve, cool. You still hangin' out, playin' Nintendo?

Skidmark Steve: Well, if you must know, I'm in my second year of med school and I'm training for the Summer Games. What are you two up to?

Coop: Just hanging out. Playing Nintendo. Cock.

Coop: Dude, I'm not gonna cave in! End of story, dude!

Douglas "Swish" Reemer: Dude?

Coop: Dude!

Douglas "Swish" Reemer: Dude!

Coop: Dude!

Douglas "Swish" Reemer: Dude!

Coop: Dude!

Douglas "Swish" Reemer: Dude!

[Off Coop's shocked look]

Douglas "Swish" Reemer: Dude.

Coop: Well, I guess you've got a point there.

Coop: Ya know sometimes I forget why I play the game. I do it because of Mr. October.

Jenna Reed: You mean the guy from the Chippendales Calendar?

Coop: No that was Dwayne Zachemore...

[Coop looks surprised]

Coop: I mean who ever it was...

Coop: I been to plenty of cities... and they ain't nothin' but trouble.

Hilly Blue: [Addressing Coop and Solo] So, you're the naughty boys who are trying to disrupt years of harmonious trade.

Hilly Blue: [addressing Rambo, who is fawning over his shoulder] They don't look especially tough to me, Rambo. Impatient, perhaps, but certainly not tough.

Rambo: When their ship comes in, there's gonna' be a dock strike!

Hilly Blue: It's strange: most people imagine me to be a very patient person, whereas, I'm just the opposite. From the very moment I want something, I *have* to have it. Nothing ever satisfies me. Everything comes too late. Too late for me, and... I get eaten up inside. When is it going to happen? When? When?

Hilly Blue: [Looking at the stolen bracelet that Coop and Solo are attempting to sell him] It takes all the fun out of a bracelet when you have to buy it yourself... Oh, well. Pay them 300, Rambo, and be done with it.

Coop: We ain't takin' 300. You know why?

Hilly Blue: Clue me.

Coop: Because our next job is gonna' be big. Real big. Worth twenty times as much. The best there is.

Hilly Blue: Miracles happen when you surrender. The trick is... surrendering on your own terms.

Hilly Blue: [sighing heavily] Ohh... here comes my impatience all over again. All right, I'll pay you 500 for these trifles right now. But then this "big deal", we'll start clean. No prejudice. I'll be fair, and so will you... Otherwise, I'll have your lungs filled with water.

Hilly Blue: [Getting up to leave] Pay them, Rambo, and... offer them dinner.

Coop: [Talking to Georgia] You push me, but you don't like where I go.

Wendy Norwood: That was incredible! It seemed so real!

Coop: Well, you just have to have the right talent.

Hank O'Hara: I think she was referring to the dog.

Mary Kate Simmons: I think you should consider 'Over Actors Anonymous.'

Coop: Mary Kate, how could you say such a thing? I'm crushed. Besides, I studied with *William Shatner*.