Billy Costigan Quotes in The Departed (2006)

Madolyn: [after a counseling session] Why is the last patient of the day always the hardest?

Billy Costigan: Because you're tired and you don't give a shit. It's not super-natural.

Oliver Queenan: [during Costigan's interview] Do you know what we do here? My section?

Billy Costigan: Sir, yes, sir. I have an idea...

Dignam: [interrupting] Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let's say you have no idea and leave it at that, okay? No idea. Zip. None. If you had an idea of what we do, we would not be good at what we do, now would we? We would be cunts. Are you calling us cunts?

Oliver Queenan: Staff Sergeant Dignam has a style of his own. I'm afraid we all have to get used to it.

Billy Costigan: [during a counseling session with Madolyn] You sit there with a mass murderer. A mass murderer. Your heart rate is jacked, and your hand... steady. That's one thing I figured out about myself in prison. My hand does not shake... ever.

Dignam: [during Costigan's interview] Your fuckin' family's dug into the Southie projects like ticks. Three-decker men at best. You, however, grew up on the North Shore, huh? Well, la-di-fuckin'-da. You were kind of a double kid, I bet, right? Huh? One kid with your old man, one kid with your mother. You're upper-middle class during the weeks, then you're droppin' your "R"s and you're hangin' in the big, bad Southie projects with your daddy, the fuckin' donkey on the weekends. I got that right?

Dignam: [Billy does not answer] Yup. You have different accents? You did, didn't you? You little fuckin' snake. You were like different people.

Billy Costigan: You a psychiatrist?

Dignam: Well, if I was I'd ask you why you're a Statie making 30 grand a year. And I think if I was Sigmund fuckin' Freud I wouldn't get an answer. So tell me, what's a lace-curtain motherfucker like you doing in the Staties?

Billy Costigan: Families are always rising or falling in America, am I right?

Oliver Queenan: Who said that?

Billy Costigan: Hawthorne.

Dignam: [Dignam makes a farting sound] What's the matter, smartass, you don't know any fuckin' Shakespeare?

Oliver Queenan: [during Costigan's interview] We have a question: Do you want to be a cop, or do you want to appear to be a cop? It's an honest question. A lot of guys just want to appear to be cops. Gun, badge, pretend they're on TV.

Dignam: Yeah, a lot of people just wanna slam a nigger's head through a plate-glass window.

Billy Costigan: I'm all set without your own personal job application. Alright, Sergeant?

Dignam: What the fuck did you say to me, trainee?

Billy Costigan: [to Queenan] With all due respect, sir, what do you want from me?

Dignam: Hey asshole, he can't help you! I know what you are, okay? I know what you are and I know what you are not. I'm the best friend you have on the face of this earth, and I'm gonna help you understand something, you punk. You're no fuckin' cop!

Billy Costigan: [to the bartender] Cranberry juice.

Man Glassed in Bar: It's a natural diuretic. My girlfriend drinks it when she's got her period. What, do you got your period?

[Billy grabs an empty glass and smashes it onto the man's head. Mr. French grabs Billy throws him against the wall. Billy tries to go towards the man again and French holds him against the wall. Billy pushes French's hands away]

Billy Costigan: Get your fuckin' hands off me!

Mr. French: [calmly] Hey, hey, hey... do you know me?

Billy Costigan: No, no.

Mr. French: Well, I'm the guy that tells you there are guys you can hit and there's guys you can't. Now, that's not quite a guy you can't hit, but it's almost a guy you can't hit. So I'm gonna make a fuckin' ruling on this right now. You don't fuckin' hit him. You understand?

Billy Costigan: Yeah, excellent. Fine, fine, fine.

Mr. French: I fucking know you. I know your family. You make one more drug deal with that idiot fucking cop-magnet of a cousin of yours and I'll forget your grandmother was so nice to me. I'll cut your fucking nuts off. You understand that?

Billy Costigan: Yeah, yeah, I do.

Mr. French: What are you drinkin'?

Billy Costigan: [embarrassed] A cranberry juice.

Mr. French: What is it, your period?

[to the bartender]

Mr. French: Get him a... cranberry juice.

Mr. French: [to the man] Hey, fuckhead, that's Jackie's nephew.

Man Glassed in Bar: Oh.

Mr. French: What? "Oh" fuckin' what?

[punches the man four times in the face]

Mr. French: Get the fuck outta here.

Colin Sullivan: [in an elevator] Just fucking kill me. Just fucking kill me.

Billy Costigan: I am killing you.

Frank Costello: I got this rat, this gnawing, cheese eating fuckin' rat and it brings up questions... You know, see, Bill, like you're the new guy. Girlfriend... Why don't you stay in the bar that night I got your numbers. Social Security numbers. Everybody's fuckin' numbers.

Billy Costigan: Is there something that you just wanna go ahead and ask me? 'Cause I'll give you the fuckin' answer, all right? Frank, look at me. Look at me. I'm not the fuckin' rat. Okay? I'm not the fuckin' rat.

Oliver Queenan: [meeting privately under a bridge next to a river] Okay, kid. Let's do this. Come on, spread 'em.

[Queenan begins searching Costigan]

Dignam: Hey, what do you think you can pop somebody and there's a special card to play? That guy, Jimmy Bags whose jaw you broke happens to work undercover for the Boston Police Department.

Billy Costigan: I'm going fucking nuts, man. I can't be someone else every fuckin' day. It's been a year of this. I've had enough of this shit!

Dignam: Calm down, alright? Most people in the world do it every day. What's the big deal?

Billy Costigan: Well, I'm not them, alright? I'm not fucking them, okay?

Dignam: Exactly. You're nobody. You signed the papers, remember? Now we're the only two people on the face of this earth that even know you're a cop. How about we just erase your file, huh? How 'bout that? How about we erase your file and then bang, you're just another soldier for Costello open to arrest for I don't know how many felonies. Huh? What do you say we do that, Captain?

Billy Costigan: How about I fucking kill you, huh? How about I fucking kill you!

Oliver Queenan: That was a joke. Come on!

Dignam: That wasn't a joke. Just because you play a tough guy, doesn't mean you are one you lace-curtain, Irish fucking pussy!

[Costigan punches Dignam]

Oliver Queenan: Hey, hey! Stop it! Break it up! Stop it!

Billy Costigan: [to Dignam] Fuck you, motherfucker!

Oliver Queenan: Goddamn it, stop it! That's an order!

[fighting stops]

Oliver Queenan: For chrissake, be smart. If anybody's watching us now, how are we not supposed to arrest you? Come on, get in the car. Both of you, get in the car!

Madolyn: [during his counseling session] What do you expect coming in here?

Billy Costigan: I have to come here.

Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?

Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.

Madolyn: You know if you lied, you would have an easier time getting what you wanted.

Billy Costigan: What does that say about what you do for a living?

Madolyn: I just think we should have a few more meetings before we even talk about prescriptions.

Billy Costigan: Look... look, I'm having panic attacks, alright? The other night I thought I was having a fucking heart attack. I puked in a trash barrel on the way over here. I haven't slept for fucking weeks.

Madolyn: Is that true?

Billy Costigan: Yeah, that's true. Alright? I said it was fucking true. I want some fucking pills and you're gonna what? You're gonna close my file? Is that what you're going to do?

Madolyn: No, I didn't close your file. I...

Billy Costigan: [angry] I thought I was supposed to tell the truth here, if only fucking here!

Madolyn: You are! You are!

Billy Costigan: Christ. I mean, a guy comes in here against every, every instinct of privacy and self-reliance he has and what do you do? What do you do, huh? You send him off on the street to score smack, is that what you do? You're fucking ridiculous!

[Madolyn hands Costigan some Valium]

Billy Costigan: [picking up the pills] Two pills? Great. Why don't you just give me a bottle of scotch and a handgun to blow my fucking head off! Are we done here with this psychiatry bullshit?

Madolyn: You know what? You can leave!

Billy Costigan: What the fuck did I just put myself through? I'm fucking out of here. And what if that was a legitimate threat? Think about it fucking hotshot!

Frank Costello: Have a seat, Bill.

[Costigan sits down at Costello's dinner table]

Frank Costello: [while eating crab] Do you know John Lennon?

Billy Costigan: Yeah, sure, he was the president before Lincoln.

Frank Costello: Lennon said, "I'm an artist. You give me a fucking tuba, I'll get you something out of it."

Billy Costigan: [sarcastically] Well I tell you Mr. Costello, I'd like to squeeze some fucking money out of it.

Frank Costello: Smart mouth. Too bad. If you'll indulge me...

[sees Gwen leaving]

Frank Costello: Now what?

Gwen: Choir practice.

Frank Costello: [annoyed] Choir practice.

[Costello pulls out a severed human hand]

Frank Costello: The point I'm making with John Lennon is - a man could look at anything, and make something out of it. For instance, I look at you and I think "what could I use you for?"

Billy Costigan: [to Frank Costello in Frank's bar] You accuse me once, I put up with it. You accuse me twice... I quit. You pressure me to fear for my life and I will put a fucking bullet in your head as if you were anybody else. Okay?

[Frank drops something. He reaches under the table and pulls up a gun. He looks at it as if he's never seen it before and then points it at Billy]

Frank Costello: You got something you wanna... ask me?

Billy Costigan: [coming from behind the wall to surprise Sullivan] Freeze!

Colin Sullivan: Whoa! Put the fucking gun down!

Billy Costigan: Put your fucking hands up!

Colin Sullivan: Alright, alright. I can get you your money!

Billy Costigan: What did you say?

Colin Sullivan: I said I can get you your...

Billy Costigan: [punches Sullivan across the face] You didn't come here to talk, you came here to get arrested.

[Slaps cuffs on him]

Colin Sullivan: You have fucking tapes of what? Costello was my informant. I was a rat? Fuck you, prove it.

Billy Costigan: [standing Sullivan up] Get up!

Colin Sullivan: What is this? A citzens arrest? Blow me. Only one of us is a cop here Bill. Did you hear me Bill? No one knows who you fucking are!

Billy Costigan: Will you shut the fuck up!

Colin Sullivan: I'm a sargeant in the Massachusetts State Police, who the fuck are you? I erased you!

Billy Costigan: [slams Sullivan against a wall] You erased me, huh?

Colin Sullivan: Yea... shoot a cop, Einstein, watch what happens.

Billy Costigan: What would happen is this bullet would go right through your fucking head!

Colin Sullivan: Watch what happens!

Billy Costigan: What? So you can get the parade? The bagpipes and bullshit? Fuck you! Fuck you! I'm fucking arresting you!

Colin Sullivan: That's the stupidest thing you could do.

Billy Costigan: [while hitting him] Shut the fuck up!

[Sullivan falls to the ground]

Billy Costigan: I could give a fuck if the charges don't stick... I'm still fucking arresting you.

Colin Sullivan: [dazed] Shit.

Billy Costigan: [in Pakistani Proprietor's store] Hey, you fellas come from Providence?

Providence Gangster #2: Isn't any of your business where we come from, is it, now?

Billy Costigan: Fuckin' delivering cannolis or something?

Billy Costigan: [talking in the back seat of a car] When are you gonna take Costello, huh?

[animated]

Billy Costigan: I mean, what's wrong with taking him on any one of the

[yelling]

Billy Costigan: million fucking felonies that you've seen him do, or I've seen him do? I mean, I mean, he murdered somebody, right? The guy fucking murders somebody, and you don't fucking take him! What are you waiting for, honestly? I mean, do you want him to chop me up and feed me to the poor? Is that what you guys want?

Dignam: [sarcastically while sitting in the front seat] Yeah, well that might stick.

Oliver Queenan: [to Dignam] Will you shut up?

Billy Costigan: [looking around in her home] You don't have any cats.

Madolyn: No.

Billy Costigan: I like that.

Uncle Ed: [in a hospital hallway] What's this I hear from Stephanie about you becoming a policeman?

Billy Costigan: You mean Stephanie, who was the only one who came to my father's funeral? That Stephanie?

Uncle Ed: Yeah, *that* Stepanie.

Billy Costigan: Nothing much to it, Uncle Edward.

Uncle Ed: Are you trying to prove something to the family?

Billy Costigan: When you say "the family," who do you mean exactly? You?

Uncle Ed: You always have to question everything, don't you?

Billy Costigan: Maybe it would have done you some good to have some *questions* from time to time, you know? "Am I an asshole? Are my kids a mess? Is my wife a money-grubbing whore?" I mean, those are questions, right? "Have I ever been good to my dying sister or am I just now pretending to be?"

Uncle Ed: Do you need some money for the funeral?

Billy Costigan: When my mother dies, we don't have any more connection.

[Billy walks away]

[Brown is telling Billy why he signed up for the police while jogging for a police training exercise ]

Brown: So she tells me, "You never finish anything. You finish the police course, you get taken care of again, baby." So after graduation, I get a blowjob again.

Billy Costigan: That's great. Your mother sounds like a wonderful woman.

Brown: Fuck yourself.

Billy Costigan: Look at it this way: You're a black guy in Boston. You don't need any help from me to be completely fucked.

Billy Costigan: [during Costigan's interview] Do you lie?

Madolyn: Why? Do you?

Billy Costigan: No, I'm asking if you lie.

Madolyn: Honesty is not synonymous with truth.

Billy Costigan: [amused] Yeah, you lie. You lie.

Frank Costello: [slams a fly on the table] You know what I like about restaurants?

Billy Costigan: The fucking food. I don't know, what?

Frank Costello: You can learn a lot, watching things eat.

[licks fly off palm]

Billy Costigan: [in Costello's bar] Frank, how many of these guys have been with you long enough to be disgruntled, huh? Think about it. You don't pay much, you know. It's almost a fuckin' feudal enterprise. The question is, and this is the only question, who thinks that they can do what you do better than you?

Frank Costello: The only one that can do what I do is me. Lot of people had to die for me to be me. You wanna be me?

Billy Costigan: I probably could be you, yeah. Yeah, I know that much. But I don't wanna be you, Frank. I don't wanna be you

Frank Costello: Heavy lies the crown... sort of thing.

Billy Costigan: No, I gotta get out. I can't be doing this anymore. You know what's gonna happen?

Oliver Queenan: What?

Billy Costigan: I know he's gonna find out who I am and he's gonna fucking kill me.

Oliver Queenan: I'm really sorry... I swear to God I am. I'll get you out of this. It won't be immediately but I will get you out. Two weeks at most.

Dignam: [On the phone with Costigan] Why don't we just meet up sweetheart? Let me buy you an ice cream.

Billy Costigan: I'm getting on a plane unless you put Queenan on the phone.

Dignam: Queenan had a funeral to go to, okay? This is my shift. Just calm down.

Billy Costigan: Meet up? Meet - you actually want me dead? Look, there is a RAT in your unit, that is a FACT! Alright? Where's Queenan?

Dignam: He's not here.

Billy Costigan: They knew you had cameras in the building! They knew EVERYTHING, alright? There is a leak from the inside! It's real, man, smoke him out!

Dignam: Yeah, how do we do that Mr. Fucking Genius who didn't even graduate from the academy?

Billy Costigan: Let it slip through SIU that you have a sealed wiretap warrant for Costello's apartment. Don't tell ANYONE in our division, but tell SIU. Flush it down the pipe and see if it comes out on my end, alright? That's what we do first, we narrow it down. Where is Queenan?

Dignam: He's not here. You want to meet up or you got something real, call me back.

[Hangs up]

Mr. French: In the future, I tell ya to do a thing, you fucking do it, you got that?

Billy Costigan: I got it, okay?

Frank Costello: [sneaks up behind Costigan, snifffing] Excuse me, uh, French, I forgot my...

Mr. French: Okay, Francis.

Frank Costello: ...cigarette.

[puffs, slaps Costigan's shoulder]

Frank Costello: Eat something.

[Colin confronts Billy on the rooftop]

Billy Costigan: FREEZE!

[points gun at Colin]

Colin Sullivan: Hey! Hey! Hey!

Billy Costigan: Put your fucking hands up!

Colin Sullivan: Put the fucking gun down! Put the gun... put the gun down, alright? I came here to talk some sense into you!

Billy Costigan: Hands!

[Slaps his arm]

Colin Sullivan: Alright! Just act professional. I can get you your money!

Billy Costigan: What'd you say?

Colin Sullivan: I can get you your MONEY!

[Billy pistol whips Colin, knocking him to the ground,]

Billy Costigan: You didn't come here to talk, alright. You came here to get arrested!

Billy Costigan: [during a counseling session] There was a cop leaving when I came in.

Madolyn: How did you know he was a cop?

Billy Costigan: Know, bad haircut, no dress sense, and, you know, a slight air of scumbag entitlement.

Frank Costello: [in a restaurant] You know, if your father were alive, and saw you here sitting with me, let's say he would have a word with me about this. In fact, he'd kill seven guys just to cut my throat, and he could do it. That's maybe something you don't know about William Costigan, Sr.

Billy Costigan: [asking if his father never murdered anyone] So he never? I mean, never?

Frank Costello: No. He kept his own counsel. He never wanted money. You can't do anything with a man like that. You're Uncle Jackie - he also would kill my entire fucking family if he saw me here with you. And I think about this.

Billy Costigan: [confused] So what the fuck are we talking about here?

Frank Costello: Did you ever think about going back to school?

Billy Costigan: School?

[laughs]

Billy Costigan: All due respect Mr. Costello, school is out.

Frank Costello: Maybe someday you'll wake the fuck up.

Other Prisoner: Hey, you Billy Costigan?

Billy Costigan: Yeah. Who wants to know?

Other Prisoner: I know a Sean Costigan, down on L Street.

Billy Costigan: Yeah that's my cousin.

Other Prisoner: Connected. Not too bright.

Billy Costigan: I know.

Other Prisoner: I mean no offense.

[Billy waves his hand at him]

Billy Costigan: [to Madolyn] There is no one more full of shit than a cop except for a cop on TV.

Frank Costello: Arm.

Billy Costigan: Arm? What fuckin' arm?

Mr. French: [French pulls Costigan to a pool table] Show me your arm. Flip it. mmhmmm, mmhmmm...

[French slams Costigan's arm on the table until the cast breaks, while Costigan screams in pain]

Frank Costello: It makes me curious to see you in this neighborhood. And if I can slander my own environment, it makes me sad. This, uh, regression. Plus, I don't know if it's beyond some fucking cop prick like Queenan to pull you out of the Staties and send you gift-wrapped to me. I just can't know. I wonder what they do in that particular department, anyway.

[Costello slams on Costigan's broken arm with Costigan's boot]

Frank Costello: [yelling] Are you still a cop?

Billy Costigan: [in severe pain] No!

[Costello whacks his arm again]

Frank Costello: [yelling] Swear on your mother's grave you're still not a cop?

Billy Costigan: [painfully] I'm not a fucking cop!

[Costello whacks his arm again, this time re-breaking it]

Frank Costello: [yelling] Are you going to stop doing coke deals with your jerk-off fucking cousin?

Billy Costigan: [weakly] Yes, yes, yes!

Frank Costello: Alright, alright. You're okay, you'll be alright. Get your hand taken care of.

[Costello throws down some money]

Frank Costello: I'm sorry, but it was necessary. As for our problem with Providence - let's not cry over some spilled guineas.

Colin Sullivan: Yeah, shoot a cop, Einstein. Watch what happens.

Billy Costigan: What would happen is this bullet would go right through your fucking head!

Billy Costigan: [During a therapy session] Is it to do some good to get somewhere personally or just for the fuck of it?

Madolyn: Well I expect some people do it to keep things on an even keel

Billy Costigan: So you had a parent who was a drunk?

Madolyn: Did you?

Billy Costigan: No

Madolyn: Let's keep it with you, talk about how you feel

Billy Costigan: There was a cop leaving when I came in, do you see cops?

Madolyn: That's part of what I do I don't normally see cadets who've just been kicked out of the academy

Billy Costigan: You should get a better job

Madolyn: Should I?

Billy Costigan: So do all those cops come in here and "cry"?

Madolyn: Sometimes they do, if they had trouble at home if they had to use their weapons

Billy Costigan: Use their weapons? They signed up to use their weapons most of them but they watch enough TV so they know they have to weep there is no one more full of shit than a cop, except for a cop on TV

Billy Costigan: [in Costello's bar] You're seventy fucking years old. One of these guys is going to pop you. As for running drugs, what the fuck. You don't need the pain in the ass, and they're going to catch you. And you don't need the money.

Frank Costello: I haven't "needed the money" since I took Archie's milk money in the third grade. Tell you the truth, I don't need pussy any more either... but I like it.

Billy Costigan: Listen, listen. I got like, like thirty thousand bucks, right? Insurance money. You know, after my mother passed and everything?

Cousin Sean: Yeah, yeah.

Billy Costigan: In your line of work, if I gave you like what, ten thousand, what could I get back?

Cousin Sean: You know... you know what you usually say at these moments?

Billy Costigan: What? What?

Cousin Sean: C'mon, man.

Billy Costigan: Aw, come on, you fucking moron. Come on. What, you want me to say it? Huh? I'm not a cop, alright? I'm your fucking cousin.

Cousin Sean: Yeah, you're bad! You corrupt fuck, man! You must be my cousin.

Billy Costigan: [while having coffee] What would you do if your boyfriend was standing right there and he saw us? Huh?

Madolyn: I would lie.

Brown: [pointing his gun at Colin] Put down the gun and step away from Sergeant Sullivan!

Billy Costigan: [pointing his gun upwards] Look, I called you. You specifically. You know who I am. I'm not gonna shoot. I told you to meet me downstairs.

Colin Sullivan: Help me.

Brown: PUT THE WEAPON ON THE DECK AND STEP AWAY FROM SERGEANT SULLIVAN!

Colin Sullivan: Shoot the fuckin' prick already!

Billy Costigan: Where's Dignam? I told you to bring Dignam!

Colin Sullivan: Shoot the motherfucker!

Brown: Put the weapon on the ground and we'll discuss it.

Colin Sullivan: SHOOT THE MOTHERFUCKER!

Billy Costigan: Look, I got boxes of tapes, evidence, all of that! I got proof! He's Costello's rat!

Brown: Maybe you do. But right now I need you to put the weapon on the deck and step away from Sergeant Sullivan!

Frank Costello: I'm going to have my associate search you.

Billy Costigan: No, no one's fucking searching me. Searching me for what?

Frank Costello: Contra-fucking-band. Take your shoes off.

[French slams Costigan into a chair]

Mr. French: Shoes.

Frank Costello: [to Costigan] I knew your father.

Billy Costigan: Yeah? You know he's dead?

Frank Costello: Oh, sorry. How'd he go?

Billy Costigan: He didn't complain.

Frank Costello: Yeah, that was his problem.

Billy Costigan: Who said he had a problem?

Frank Costello: I just said he had a fucking problem. There's a man who could have been anything.

Billy Costigan: Are you trying to say he was nothing?

[French slams Costigan onto a pool table and continues his search]

Frank Costello: I'm saying he worked at the airport.

Billy Costigan: You hear me, you two-faced faggot?

Billy Costigan: [smashes a picture over the bankrobber's head and holds him at gunpoint] You take off an armored car at the Dedham Mall. What the fuck do you do, you pay guineas in Providence?

Kneecapped Bankrobber: Fucking now I do!

Billy Costigan: [slaps him] What the fuck do you do?

Kneecapped Bankrobber: What? I gotta pay Costello and wait for him to trade me to the FBI? 'Cause that's what he does!

Billy Costigan: FBI? What... What the fuck are you talking about, FBI?

Kneecapped Bankrobber: [Mr. French lights off firecrackers outside] Oh my God, is that French out there?

Billy Costigan: [grabs the bankrobber by the collar] What the fuck did you just say about the FBI, huh?

Kneecapped Bankrobber: Forget what I said, I'm fucking high...

Billy Costigan: [forces him onto the couch] Whatever may be going on in that very fucking poor, very limited brain of yours, I am not gonna hurt you, all right? Just tell me what you just fucking said!

Kneecapped Bankrobber: [panicking] Forget it, I'm high. I'm fucking high, I must be high. I would never say what you thought I said...

Kneecapped Bankrobber: [Billy shoots him in the knee] Oh! Fuck!

Billy Costigan: Now, what the fuck did you just fucking say?

Kneecapped Bankrobber: Why do you think he never gets busted? Costello's a protected FBI informant! He'll trade you out!

[his voice rises in pitch]

Kneecapped Bankrobber: I thought I was supposed to go into shock, I'm not in shock! It fucking hurts!

Madolyn: [after a therapy session] I'm not someone you have to see or they put you in jail if you're in distress I will help you here's my card and a prescription of medication that'll help you

Billy Costigan: Is that enough to commit suicide?

Madolyn: Maybe it is have I done my job to your God damn standards? Because according my standards you fit the model of drug seeking behavior too damn bad if you don't like my initial clinical reaction