Al Bert Quotes in Critters 4 (1992)
Al Bert Quotes:
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Fran: Asshole!
Al Bert: Eh, Captain asshole.
-- Al Bert -
Al Bert: Like my ex-wife. Anything I say, she does the opposite.
-- Al Bert -
Ethan: I guess Rick's had a little too much coffee again?
Al Bert: Rick has got a bug up his butt. See. He's gone and discovered himself a magnetic space anomaly. And he's gotten stiff in the jock.
-- Al Bert -
Rick: We got a goldmine here. I can smell it.
Al Bert: I can sure smell something.
-- Al Bert -
Al Bert: Nuclear core is reading just shy of the red. Nearly to alert.
Rick: Radiation?
Al Bert: Negative. It looks more like natural decay. I'd give her about a month before we all glow in the dark.
Bernie: Don't kind about shit like that. Just show me where the pharmacy is.
Al Bert: What's the matter? Feeling a little bit under the weather there Bernie?
-- Al Bert -
Bernie: What's the matter?
Fran: Rick! Cargo bay.
Al Bert: Seems our fearless leader has some plans for Terracor's long-lost pod.
Bernie: You mean steal it? Steal what's inside?
Al Bert: Yup, leave us here counting R.E.M.s as we glow in the dark.
Bernie: Scum bag. Are you sure?
-- Al Bert -
Charlie: That's not normal.
Al Bert: No shit, Sherlock.
Charlie: No, I mean they don't usually turn from a fight. Or a meal.
-- Al Bert -
Fran: I thought you said there was no radiation danger.
Al Bert: Well, Fran, maybe the nuclear core just changed its mind.
-- Al Bert -
Al Bert: Congratulations, Charlie, you have just murdered the ship.
-- Al Bert -
Al Bert: Rick and Bernie are dead. For all I know we may have been infected by some alien germ. So unless anyone else has another suggestion, I propose that we just hole up here and wait for them to come rescue us. They will be here any minute.
Ethan: Yeah. If we don't blow up first.
-- Al Bert -
Al Bert: Angela; give me a deck by deck scan and read off all individuals not currently in main control.
Angela: I do not recognize your voice pattern as one with security clearance...
Al Bert: Great! Be a snotty TL54. Don't cooperate. Angela; give me security clearance to all levels, please.
Angela: I can not conform to your request as I do not recognize your voice pattern as one with security clearance.
Al Bert: Angela; do not, repeat, do not give me security clearance to all levels.
Angela: You have security clearance at all levels.
-- Al Bert
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