Skinner Quotes in Edge of Tomorrow (2014)

Skinner: [in the helicopter] Hey Mate! I think there's something wrong with your suit, There's a dead guy in it

[laughs aloud]

Cruella De Vil: [to Skinner on the phone] Mr. Skinner, suspicions are mounting. Police are everywhere. I want the job done tonight. Can you do it?

Skinner: [taps one of the keys on the phone several times to communicate]

Cruella De Vil: Any way you want. Poison them, drown them, bash them on the head. Got any chloroform? I don't care how you kill the little beasts, just do it, and do it now!

Jasper: Now, there are two things you must not do with Skinner. One, do not look at the horrendous scar on his neck. Two, don't talk to him. Understand? Not a word.

Horace: Right.

[Skinner answers the door and looks at Horace]

Horace: Ahh! Look at the size of that scar! No bl - oody wonder you can't talk, mate!

Skinner: [Wheezing]

Jasper: [to Skinner] Excuse me just a minute, would you?

[closes the door and punches Horace]

Horace: [Horace falls down]

Skinner: ...we're civilized and the art of civilization is doing natural things in an unnatural way.

Skinner: You know something about rats, you know you do!

Linguini: You know who know, do, whacka-do. Ratta-tatta - Hey, why do they call it that?

Skinner: What?

Linguini: Ratatouille. It's like a stew, right? Why do they call it that? If you're gonna name a food, you should give it a name that sounds delicious. Ratatouille doesn't sound delicious. It sounds like "rat" and "patootie." Rat patootie! Which does not sound delicious.

[holds out his glass for more wine]

Skinner: [growling] Regrettably, we are all... out... of wine.

Skinner: [on Linguini] Look at him out there, pretending to be an idiot! He's toying with my mind like a cat with a ball... of something!

Lawyer: String?

Skinner: Yes! Playing dumb, taunting me with that RAT!

Lawyer: [confused] Rat?

Skinner: Yes! He's consorting with it, deliberately trying to make me think it's important!

Lawyer: The... rat?

Skinner: EXACTLY!

Lawyer: Is the rat important?

Skinner: [pause] Of course not! He just wants me to THINK that it is! O-ho, I see the theatricality of it! A rat appears on the boy's first night, I order him to kill it, and now he wants me to see it everywhere!

Skinner: [high voice] Ooooh! It's here! No it isn't it's here! Am I seeing things, am I crazy, is there a phantom rat or is there not, but oh, no! I refuse to be sucked into his little game... of...

Lawyer: Should I be concerned about this? About you?

Skinner: Toasting your success, eh, Linguini? Good for you.

Linguini: [indicating his wine glass] Oh, I just took it to be polite. I don't really drink, you know.

Skinner: Oh, of course you don't. I wouldn't either if I was drinking *that*. But you would have to be an idiot of elephantine proportions not to appreciate this '61 Château Latour, and you, Monsieur Linguini, are no idiot. Let us toast your non-idiocy!

Skinner: [interrogating Linguini after plying him with wine] Have you ever had a pet rat?

Linguini: No.

Skinner: Did you work in a lab with rats?

Linguini: Nooope.

Skinner: Perhaps you lived in squalor at some point?

Linguini: Nopity, nopity noo.

Lawyer: Well, the will stipulates that if after two years from the date of death, no heir appears, Gusteau's business will pass on to his sous-chef, you.

Skinner: I know what the will stipulates! What I want to know, is if this letter - if this *boy* changes anything!

[the lawyer looks at Linguini through the window, comparing it to Gusteau's picture on the wall]

Lawyer: There's not much resemblance.

Skinner: There's NO resemblance at all! He's not Gusteau's son, Gusteau had no children! And what of the timing of all this? The deadline in the will expires in less than a month! Suddenly some boy arrives with a letter from his recently deceased mother claiming Gusteau is his father? Highly suspect!

Lawyer: [about a chef's toque in a glass container] ... This was Gusteau's?

Skinner: Yes.

Lawyer: May I?

Skinner: Of course, of course.

[the lawyer takes a hair out of the toque]

Lawyer: But, the boy does not know?

Skinner: She claims she never told him, or Gusteau, and asks that I not tell!

Lawyer: Why you? What does she want?

Skinner: A job, for the boy.

Lawyer: Only a job? Well, then this is easy. If he works here, you can keep an eye on him while I do a little digging, find out how much of this is real. I'll need you to collect some DNA samples from the boy, hair maybe...

Skinner: Mark my words, the whole thing is *highly* suspect. He knows... something.

Lawyer: Relax, he's a garbage boy. I think you can handle him.

Skinner: The soup! Where is the soup? Out of my way. Move it, garbage boy!

[sees a ladle in Linguini's hand]

Skinner: You are COOKING? How DARE you cook in MY kitchen! Where do you get the gall to even attempt something so monumentally idiotic? I should have you drawn and quartered! I'll do it! I think the law is on my side! Larousse, draw and quarter this man - after you put him in the duck press to squeeze the fat out of his head!

Linguini: What should I do now?

Skinner: Kill it!

Linguini: Now?

Skinner: No, not in the kitchen! Are you mad?

Larousse: Hey, boss, look who it is! Alfredo Linguini! Renata's little boy! All grown up, eh? You remember Renata. Gusteau's old flame?

Skinner: Ah, yes. How are you, uh...

Larousse: Linguini.

Skinner: Yes, Linguini, so nice of you to visit. How is, uh...?

Linguini: My mother?

Skinner: Yes...

Larousse: Renata.

Skinner: Yes, Renata. How is she?

Linguini: Good... well, not... good... She's been better. She's, uh... she...

Horst: She died.

Skinner: [attempting to care] Oh, uh, I'm sorry.

Linguini: Well, don't be. She believed in Heaven, so she's covered... you know, afterlife-wise? Uh...

[clumsily gives Skinner a letter]

Skinner: What is this?

Linguini: She left it for you. I think she hoped it would help... me. You know, get a job... Here?

Skinner: Surely you don't expect me to believe this is your first time cooking?

Linguini: It's not.

Skinner: I KNEW IT!

Linguini: It's my... second, third, fourth, fifth time. Monday was my first time. But I've taken out the garbage lots of times before that...

Skinner: Yes, yes, yes, have some more wine.

Skinner: [seeing a ladle in Linguini's hand] You are COOKING? How DARE you cook in MY kitchen! Where do get the gall to attempt something so monumentally idiotic? I should have you drawn and quartered! I'll do it! I think the law is on my side! Larousse, draw and quarter this man! *After* you put him in the duck press to squeeze the fat out of his head!

[as he's shouting, Lalo ladles some soup into a tureen and brings it to the waiter]

Linguini: Oh no no no, OH NO, don't let them, don't eat...

Skinner: What are you blathering about?

Linguini: ...the soup!

Skinner: [sees the soup going out runs to stop it] Soup? Stop that soup! Noooooooo!

[bursts into the dining room to the stares of the diners, retreats back into the kitchen and watches through the window as the waiter serves the soup]

Solene LeClaire: [tasting the soup] Waiter!

Skinner: [gasps] Linguini! You're fired! F-I-R-E-D! Fired!

Mustafa: She wants to see the chef.

Mustafa: [scared] B-but he...

[clears his throat and goes to speak to the customer; Colette tastes the soup; Skinner re-enters]

Colette: What did the customer say?

Mustafa: It was not a customer. It was a critic.

Colette: Ego?

Skinner: Solene LeClaire.

Colette: LeClaire. What did she say?

Mustafa: She likes the soup.

Skinner: I will have whatever he is having.

Skinner: [to Linguini] You are either very lucky or very unlucky. You will make the soup again, and this time I'll be paying attention. Very close attention. They think you might be a cook. But you know what I think, Linguini? I think you're a sneaky, overreaching little...

Skinner: [sees Remy escaping] RAAAT!

Skinner: [growling] What are you playing at?

Linguini: [uncertain] Um, uh... am I still fired?

Colette: You can't fire him.

Skinner: What?

Colette: LeClaire likes it, yeah? She made a point of telling you so. if she write a review to that effect and find out you fired the cook responsible?

Skinner: He's a garbage boy.

Colette: Who made something she liked! How can we claim to represent the name of Gusteau if we don't uphold his most cherished belief?

Skinner: And what belief is that, Mademoiselle Tatou?

Colette: Anyone can cook.

[pause, Skinner looks around at the other cooks, who are smiling with approval]

Skinner: Perhaps I have been a bit harsh on our new garbage boy. He has taken a bold risk, and we should reward that, as Chef Gusteau would have. If he wishes to swim in dangerous waters, who are we to deny him?

Skinner: And don't forget to stress its Linguini-ness.

Horst: Oui, chef.

Mustafa: [panicked] Someone has asked what is new!

Horst: New?

Mustafa: Yes! What do I tell them?

Horst: Well, what *did* you tell them?

Mustafa: I told them I would ask!

Skinner: What are you blathering about?

Horst: Customers are asking what is new!

Mustafa: What should I tell them?

Skinner: What *did* you tell them?

Mustafa: [exasperated] I TOLD THEM I WOULD ASK!

Skinner: This is simple. Just pull out an old Gusteau recipe, something we haven't made in a while...

Mustafa: They know about the old stuff. They like Linguini's soup.

Skinner: They are asking for food from LINGUINI?

Skinner: [to Linguini] Welcome to Hell.

Lawyer: What are you so worried about? Isn't it good to have the press? Isn't it good to have Gusteau's name getting headlines?

Skinner: Not if they're over his face! Gusteau's already has a face, and it's fat and lovable and familiar. And it sells burritos! Millions and millions of burritos!

Skinner: I want you to work up something for my latest frozen food concept: Gusteau's Corn Puppies. They're like corn dogs, only smaller. Bite size.

Francois: What are corn dogs?

Skinner: Cheap sausages dipped in batter and deep fried. You know, American. Whip something up. Maybe Gusteau in overalls and Huckleberry Tom hat.

Francois: Or as a big ear of corn in doggie make-up.

Skinner: Y-yes. But, please, with dignity.

Skinner: [to Linguini] Got your toque!

Skinner: [to Linguini] Do you know what would happen if anyone knew we had a rat in our kitchen? They'd close us down. Our reputation is hanging as a thread as it is. Take it away from here. Far away. Kill it. Dispose of it. Go!

Colette: Table five coming up right now.

Skinner: Coming down the line.

Colette: Set. Hot. Open oven.

Skinner: Coming around.

Colette: Oui, chef. One filet mignon, three lamb, two duck.

Skinner: Fire those soufflés for table six, ja?

Colette: Five minutes, chef.

Remy: Oh, God.

Mustafa: Tonight, I'd like to present the foie gras. It has a wonderful finish.

Skinner: Ready to go on table seven. Come on! Let's go!

Colette: Oui, chef.

Skinner: [to Collette] Since you have expressed such an interest in his cooking career, you shall be responsible for it. Anyone else? Then back to work!

Skinner: Get the rat! Linguini. Get something to trap it.

Horst: It's getting away. Get it, get it, get it.

Skinner: [to Linguini] Collette will be responsible with teaching you how we do things here.

Nick Palestro: For a buck, you'd double-cross your own mother.

Skinner: Why not? She'd do the same to me.

Jim Tripplett: What the hell are you dressed up for? Where's the war?

Skinner: In your ass!