Sam Longwood Quotes in The Great Scout & Cathouse Thursday (1976)

[Sam rebuffs the romantic advances of Thursday]

Thursday: Where are you going, Sam?

Sam Longwood: I'm going into town to get my money from Jack Colby and then get shed of the bunch of ya! I've been shot five times, knifed twice, bit on the ass by a pig, stomped on by a horse and sat on by a mule. And once, in the winter of '91, a grizzly chewed my big toe off. And I've survived two avalanches, three blizzards, five Indian uprisings and seven Presidential elections, but I aint never been owned by no woman nor dog... and I've come too far down the road to let it happen to me now.

Jack Colby: I would'a got your damn money to ya, if I couldn'a found ya. I tried years ago.

Sam Longwood: You're lying.

Jack Colby: How do you know?

Sam Longwood: Your lips are moving.

Sam Longwood: Yeah, that's good enough for you to say, but we could've been rich. We could've been somebody, instead of dusteaters and cowkickers. We could've bought some respectability with that money.

Sam Longwood: You'd better cut him once, Joe Knox, just to show 'em we ain't dirt farmin'.

Sam Longwood: One thing we haven't gotten in 15 years is dumber.

Jack Colby: No, you couldn't have.

Sam Longwood: Raped? What's that, an old Indian tradition?

Joe Knox: It's an army tradition. I was conceived at Wolf Paw massacre, remember?

Sam Longwood: Well, the army teaches it's men to love the enemy.

Joe Knox: Yes. In groups.

Joe Knox: My father was a sergeant, two corporals, a bugler and a company cook.

Sam Longwood: Well, that makes you about five, six white men after all!

[laughs]

Sam Longwood: I think the army did you a favor.

Joe Knox: And I have been trying to repay that favor ever since I learned how to use a hunting knife.

[opens his vest to show his collection of scalps]

Sam Longwood: Oh, for Christ sake, will you put those mouldy scalps away? I happen to know that you bought them off a drummer in New Haven, Connecticut for fifty cents a piece.

Sam Longwood: What's come over you, Nancy Sue? We turn our backs for a few years and here you are cussin' like a muleskinner, cheating on your husband! You know, that ain't lady like. I gotta gell you, Nancy Sue, I'm disappointed in you!

Sam Longwood: Who says you're coming along? I can't be going around with no kid hanging after.

Thursday: You didn't think I was much of a kid last night.

Sam Longwood: I was cold last night. In the dark you felt a lot older. I felt a lot younger.

Thursday: Then close your eyes!