King Roderick Quotes in The Court Jester (1955)

King Roderick: The Duke. What did the Duke do?

Hubert Hawkins: Eh... the Duke do?

King Roderick: Yes. And what about the Doge?

Hubert Hawkins: Oh, the Doge!

King Roderick: Eh. Well what did the Doge do?

Hubert Hawkins: The Doge do?

King Roderick: Yes, the Doge do.

Hubert Hawkins: Well, uh, the Doge did what the Doge does. Eh, uh, when the Doge does his duty to the Duke, that is.

King Roderick: What? What's that?

Hubert Hawkins: Oh, it's very simple, sire. When the Doge did his duty and the Duke didn't, that's when the Duchess did the dirt to the Duke with the Doge.

King Roderick: Who did what to what?

Hubert Hawkins: Oh, they all did, sire. There they were in the dark; the Duke with his dagger, the Doge with his dart, Duchess with her dirk.

King Roderick: Duchess with her dirk?

Hubert Hawkins: Yes! The Duchess dove at the Duke just when the Duke dove at the Doge. Now the Duke ducked, the Doge dodged, and the Duchess didn't. So the Duke got the Duchess, the Duchess got the Doge, and the Doge got the Duke!

King Roderick: Curious. I... I... hm? What? What's that? All I heard was that the Duchess had a siege of rheumatism. She's 83, you know.

King Roderick: Take that horse and put it back under that idiot!

Princess Gwendolyn: Marry Griswold? Never!

King Roderick: What was that?

Princess Gwendolyn: He's a brute and a lout.

King Roderick: Brute or not, lout or not, if it pleases me you will marry Griswold.

Princess Gwendolyn: If it pleases you so much, you marry Griswold.

King Roderick: Rules of Chivalry be hanged! Ravenhurst, take that nincompoop, and knight that nincompoop by noon tomorrow!

Princess Gwendolyn: I've seen this monster and it's not for nothing he's called the grim, grisly, and gruesome Griswold.

King Roderick: Grim, grisly, or gruesome, you marry Griswold.

King Roderick: Take the witch out and burn her!

Princess Gwendolyn: Harm one hair on her head and I throw myself from the highest turret!

King Roderick: Gwendolyn, you go too far.