Barry Burke Quotes in Someone Marry Barry (2014)

Melanie Miller: Hey! Ladies first, ladies first!

Barry Burke: I'll tell you if I see one.

Melanie Miller: Did I get puke on your cock?

Barry Burke: Don't worry about it. I like it.

Barry Burke: [at a speed dating event] Hi, I'm Barry... NEXT!

Barry Burke: I'm not going to lie. This is exactly what it looks like.

Barry Burke: I notice you carry a formidable amount of junk in your trunk.

Barry Burke: [to Mel Miller] You've got cockfight written all over you.

Melanie Miller: I think they have incredible cuisine at Hooters, but most people don't notice 'cause of all the massive tits.

Barry Burke: I know, the tits are distracting.

Melanie Miller: Sorry they're only B-cup, but actually I can swell to a C when I'm menstruating.

Desmond: That's... disgusting.

Barry Burke: My god. I never thought I'd say this to a lady, but I can't wait until your time of the month!

Barry Burke: I am gay for your 'stache.

Barry Burke: But that is neither here nor there.

Goker: No, no, my friend. That is both here and there.

Barry Burke: [surprised] You're giving me shit? He's the one trying to get laid at his Dad's funeral!

Barry Burke: Everyone knows you're too busy chasing around random skanks to spend time with your son.

Barry Burke: Any guy would gladly get up to his nuts in her guts, okay? That's not up for dispute here.