Art Quotes in High Sierra (1941)

Art: If I didn't know where they were from, I'd think they were phony.

Roy Earle: Poor old Mac. There he was lying dead with $500,000 beside him. Well, it's all yours and all I want is my cut.

Art: You gonna have to wait a few days for that Roy;

Roy Earle: [surprised and annoyed] What?

Art: Don't look at me like that. my share you can put in your eye. Larry's the head man now that Mac's gone.

Roy Earle: Kansas City?

Art: That's him. He's flying out. Now, you leave the stuff with me and hide out for a while. I can help you out a little.

Roy Earle: Are you trying to pull a fast one on me? Because I don't like fast ones.

Art: well take the stuff with you if you feel that way. But it'll be like carrying a bomb around.

Roy Earle: Okay. Give me a couple of $100's and keep this. But if I don't get my end, you not gonna be around long. You and Larry both.

Art: Now don't worry Roy. You'll get it. Here's the $200

Roy Earle: [Roy reaches in the jewelry box and gets a ring] Yeah, that's what I want.

Marie Garson: [Roy goes back to the car where Marie and Pard the dog wait and he puts the ring on a surprised Marie] Oh Roy!...

Roy Earle: That's a present.

Marie Garson: Of course, you would put it on the wrong finger.

[they embrace and kiss]

[as the Oozmas are watching the Scare Floor at Monsters Inc. in order for Mike to show them what it takes to be Scarers, they soon get caught by the Security Guards with their flashlights]

Security Guard: Hey, what are you doing up there?

Art: [Panicking] I can't go back to jail!

Greek Council VP: [Referring to a Purple Glowing Urchin] Trust me when I say you are not gonna want to touch this bad boy!

Art: I wanna touch it!

Mike Wazowski: Um, h... hello? Fella

[as he and Sully walk down the basement into a candlelit are, where O.K fraternity surround it, wearing black clocks]

Don: Do you, pledge your souls to the Oozma Kappa brotherhood.

Mike Wazowski: [Terri and Terry hit Mike with a cricket bat] OW!

Terry: Do you swear to keep secret.

Terri: All that you learn

Art: No matter, how horrifying.

Sulley: [Squishy hit Sulley with cricket bat] Hey!

Squishy: Will take the scared oath of the...

[initiation interrupted by someone, turning on the lights]

Don: For crying out loud.

Ms. Squibbles: Sweetie, turn the lights on when your down here. You're going ruin your eyes.

Squishy: MOM, WE'RE DOING AN INITIATION!

Ms. Squibbles: Oh Scary, well go on. Just pretend that I'm not here

[turns off half the lights, and walk downstairs to the washing machine]

Squishy: This is my mom's house. Do you promise to look out for your brothers?

[Mrs. Squibbles turns on the laundry dial loudly]

Squishy: No what the peril?

[Laundry machine runs noisily]

Squishy: ... WILL YOU DEFEND OOZMA KAPPA? NO MATTER HOW DANGEROUS?NO MATTER HOW INSURMOUNTABLE? THE ODDS MAYBE? FROM EVILS BOTH GREAT AND SMALL? IN THE FACE OF UNENDING PAIN AND... OH FORGET IT. You're in.

[as Mike and Sulley exit their Oozma Kappa Bedroom at the same time after waking up, they fall over, and Squishy suddenly snaps a photo of them]

Squishy: First morning in the house.

Art: That's going in the Album.

Don: [Arriving with a Scare Games Letter] Guys, it's arrived, our first challenge.

[Mike struggles to pull it off him]

Don: Sorry, Tentacles. Kinda Sticky.

[Mike reads the envelope]

Mike Wazowski: Wait a minute. They want us to meet where?

[Richard has given Art his manual to read and is nervously hovering in the next room]

Richard: What page are you on now?

Art: I'm on page shut the fuck up.

[after a minute, Richard tries to quietly open the door]

Art: I've got CP, I'm not deaf!

Audrey: I hope nobody I know drives by and sees me standing in the yard staring at the house in my pajamas.

Art: If they know your dad, they won't think anything of it.

Art: The little lights... they aren't twinkling.

Clark: I know, Art. Thanks for noticing.

[after Clark fails at lighting all the exterior Christmas lights at the "lighting ceremony" in front of the entire family]

Frances: Talk about pissing your money away. I hope you kids see what a silly waste of resources this was.

Audrey: He worked really hard, Grandma.

Art: So do washing machines.

Art: It was an ugly tree anyway.

Art: [a messenger delivers Clark's envelope with his "bonus", the family looks questioningly] What is it? A letter confirming your reservation at the nuthouse?

Art: [after Clark has flipped out] You're goofy.

Clark: [Still flipped out] Don't piss me off, Art.

Art: [to Rocky] You got a kiss for me?

Eddie: Better take a rain check on that, Art - he's got a lip fungus they ain't identified yet...

Art: You want to hurry this up, Clark? I'm freezing my baguettes off.

Ray Peterson: [chanting] I'm not going to listen to this, I'm not going to hear this now.

Art: Ray! Ray! You're chanting!

Art: [points to book] Ray. Ray, look.

Art: Ray, unconscious chanting! You're chanting!

Ray Peterson: [continues chanting with fingers in ears]

Art: [chants] I want to kill everyone. Satan is good. Satan is our pal.

Art: Ray. Ray, you're chanting! Hey, once they

[points to book]

Art: get in here...

[points to Ray's head]

Art: ...it's over, pal.

Carol Peterson: He can't come out until he resembles the man that I married.

Art: Carol, We don't have that kind of time.

Art: Now they know that we know that they know that we know.

Art: Safety is my middle name.

Ray Peterson: I thought his middle name was Louis.

Art: I think the message to, uh, psychos, fanatics, murderers, nutcases all over the world is, uh, "do not mess with suburbanites". Because, uh, frankly we're just not gonna take it any more. Ya know, we're not gonna be content to look after our lawns and wax our cars, paint out houses. We're out to get them, Don, we are out to get them.

Mark Rumsfield: Art!

Bonnie Rumsfield: Your wife is home!

Mark Rumsfield: And your house is on fire!

Art: My wife is home?

Art: Wait, hold it, garbies! Garbies, garbage men! Hold on a minute, wait a sec! Wait. Wait, wait, hold it. What are you doing?

Vic, Garbageman #1: Emptying garbage.

Art: Into the garbage truck? What are you, out of your mind?

Art: Hey, hey, hey. Who the heck ordered the blood shake? Hey, Ray, it's not Skip. It's me, Art. I'm just pretending to be Skip. Say, you didn't happen to see an ice pick around here, did you?

Art: Apparently their last house, it only... burned to the ground.

Ray Peterson: Really?

Art: Yeah, a hideous raging inferno.

Art: I'm tellin' ya, officer, there's a body buried in that house.

Detective #1: The old man, Mr. Seznick right?

Art: Yeah the old guy who's sitting here is buried in that house, Sherlock.

[Art and Ricky are sitting on the porch when Ray comes out]

Art: He comes over here to smoke cigars, his wife won't let him, he doesnt know i know that... Hiya Ray! How ya doing bud?

Art: Rumsfield and I, we flushed them out. We wrote a note, we slipped it under the door, we rang the bell and then we ran.

Ray Peterson: You did that?

Art: Yeah.

Ray Peterson: [Jumps up] OH GEEZ! STUPID IDI - I can't believe you -...

[Crushes a beer can in each hand]

Art: All I did was write, "I know what you've done". That's all. I didn't sign it.

Ray Peterson: OH! I can't belie - YOU STUPID... GOD!

Art: You gotta goose these people every once in a while. You gotta give them a little shot, give them a little whack, let them know that you're there.

Art: You know what the deal is? We gotta go down to the religious supply store. We gotta get a couple of gallons of holy water. My cousin Gary is a priest. He can get us a deal!

Art: I remember the first time I tried to kill my Betty.

David Leary: ...What?

Art: Let me finish...

David Leary: You tried to kill Betty?

Art: Oh I see. I see, Mr. High-and-mighty. Hey, I didn't kill the shop teacher! Who killed the shop teacher? YOU killed the shop teacher! You killed 'em!

Art: Hello. I'm Art.

Betty: And I'm Betty.

Art: And I'm Art.

Ben: Which one's Betty again?

Betty: That's me. I'm Betty.

Art: Morning, neighbor.

David Leary: Morning, Art.

Art: I bet you're wondering, Why in the Sam Hill am I chopping wood at this hour?

David Leary: Not really.

Art: You know who Sam Hill was?

David Leary: No, I don't.

Art: Well, he wasn't anyone. It's a euphemism. Cockney expression for what the hell.

[shouts]

Art: What the hell! What the hell! Then it turned into, "What the Sam Hill?"

David Leary: I'll see you later, Art. You'll be here later, right?

Art: [shouts] What the hell!

Mother: Why are you smiling?

Art: I got a surprise for you and dad.

Mother: Don't say that dear.

Art: Mum, Dad, This is Dr. Ellington. He's going to make me be more normal. He's very, very famous. Very, very successful.

Art: I've moved back in. For a while. Back home.

Mother: Well, it was just a matter of time. Look, I really got to go. Please try to not make a mess of things.

Jeremy: You know, they do anything to be in a position at your age.

Art: I know. That's why I am volunteering. Giving my time, to help the community.

Art: I want my personal therapist here during any formal discussion.

Jeremy: You have a personal therapist?

Art: Shut up in yo' face.

Art: What you're saying, it offends common sense.

John Oldman: So does Relativity, Quantum Mechanics, that's the way nature works.

Harry: [insistent] *You* are creating the mystery here obviously y'have something you'd like to say. Say it.

John Oldman: [Hesitant] Maybe... I...

Harry: [sing-song] Ten, nine, eight, seven, si...

Sandy: [Chiding] Harry, stop.

John Oldman: There is something I'm tempted to tell you I think, I've never done this before, I wonder how it will pan out. I wonder if I could ask you a silly question?

Art: [Scoffing] John, we're teachers, we answer silly questions all the time

Linda Murphy: [Teasing] Hey!

John Oldman: What if a man from the upper Paleolithic survived until the present day?

Dan: A medical test might be a way of proving of what you're saying

John Oldman: I don't wanna prove it.

Art: So, you're telling us this the yarn

[?]

Art: of the century and you don't care if we believe it or not?

John Oldman: I guess I should've expected you to... You're not as crazy as you think I am.

Edith: Amen!

Sandy: I've always liked you.

Edith: Well, thank you dear.

Sandy: Well, that's changing.

John Oldman: I had a chance to sail with Columbus, only I'm not the adventurous type. I was pretty sure the earth was round, but at that point I still thought he *might* fall off an edge some place.

The Group: [incredulous looks all around the room]

Art: Look around John, we just did!

John Oldman: I suspect I saw the British Isles from what is now the French coast. Huge mountains on the other side of an enormous deep valley that was shadowed by the setting sun. This was before they were separated from the continent by the rising seas as the glacier was melting.

Harry: That happened?

Dan: Yes, the end of the Plasticine Period. So far what he says fits.

Art: [incredulous] Oh get... from any textbook...

John Oldman: And that's where I found it. How can I have knowledgeable recall if I didn't have knowledge? It's all retrospective. All I can do is integrate my recollections with modern findings.

Harry: [Wryly echoing Dan] Supernatural.

Art: [Quietly disturbed / reflective] Supernatural, stupid word, everything that happens happens within nature whether we believe it or not.

John Oldman: [Amused] Like a fourteen thousand year old caveman?

Art: You-you-you realize this is an invitation to men in white suits with happy pills?

Harvey: Where do you think I got these track pants?

Art: How the fuck should I know?

Harvey: I got them in the future, that's where.

Art: Well, they are pretty nice.

Harvey: Everyone wears them in the future. They're really comfortable.

Art: Jigsaw's testing you, you fucking piece of shit!

[Art reaches inside a bag]

Rigg: Put your fucking hands where I can see them! Put your fucking hands where I can see them!

Art: Jigsaw's fucking testing you!

Rigg: Don't fucking move!

Art: I recommend you stay alive until the fucking clock counts down.

Art: Want tofu smoothy?

Art: Cuntzilla... Art coming!

Art: Wanna umm, pull?

West: What ya talkin' about?

Art: That umm, chair for pull, and watch video!

West: Holy shit! Those are all pornos? Damn, different girlfriend every night I guess?

Art: Yah, yah, fun... fun fun fun!

West: Fuck yah it's fun.