Volkmar Sigusch quotes:

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  • Aura of the mysterious is a minor perversion that a couple shares. A fetish that one of the two partners finds arousing, or a particular sexual scenario. Fantasies have to remain dirty. Cleanliness, scrupulousness and rationality are poison for eroticism.

  • Sexual desire declines after four to seven years. That's been proven.Because it's the most compatible with our spiritual origins. Father, mother, small family - that's the way we've developed our souls, the way we've become, and the way we feel safe, protected and loved.

  • Fantasies have to remain dirty. Cleanliness, scrupulousness and rationality are poison for eroticism.

  • The sexual revolution of the 1960s was mostly a movement of young people. I felt that the so-called "free relationships" were overrated.

  • The social problem is that we haven't come up with any alternative models. Our culture hasn't developed an ars erotica. Think, for example, of conditions in India or in Japanese culture and of how the erotic has been cultivated there. They're not as clinical and rabbit-like as we are.

  • While the Internet generally tends to have a stress-relieving function for adults - as long as they aren't inclined toward sex addiction - I don't see this being the case for adolescents.

  • Just go to an auto show, and you'll see all the signs of sexual arousal in the men: shiny eyes, tremors, sex flush. An acute example of the need for professional sex research.

  • Exaggerated portrayals apparently destroy desire more effectively than any repression.

  • For people who are desperate and searching, sexuality on the Internet offers an incredible release.

  • Good sex can be anything, including dirty.

  • Internet sexuality shows that we're becoming more and more self-involved. I'm talking about self-sex.

  • It's important for a couple to talk about their sexual preferences. On the other hand, the aura of the mysterious should be preserved.

  • The sexual revolution produced cultural convulsions that were unparalleled in the 20th century. The female sex was historically sexualized and required to have orgasms for the first time. Sexual "deviants," particularly homosexuals, achieved partial emancipation.

  • It's very important to approach pedophiles and pedosexuals and offer them therapy. It's been my experience that you can reach your objective with what I would call kind-hearted, informed and enlightened patients - in the sense that they don't lose their desire, but that they no longer have physical contact with children. That would be the goal.

  • Perhaps the couple got married at 25 and now they're 45 and this is an option. And if a couple is still together, or perhaps finds its way back together, I like to say that it's forever. They belong together, it's a good fit, it's the right pairing. It almost gives me goose bumps.

  • Some 95 percent of all sexual contact still occurs in permanent relationships. That's an impressive number.

  • There are many options in a marriage. If the couple has been together for a certain amount of time and has a certain amount of liberalism or life experience, it could be the kind of relationship in which one partner ventures into the occasional affair, which is then forgiven. This only happens every 13 years on average, but it obviously does occur.

  • We are all potential murderers, and we are all potential rapists and abusers.

  • I have the utmost respect for people who are asexual. I didn't believe that they existed at first. But they do exist, and their numbers are growing.

  • I maintain that we are still a largely ignorant society when it comes to sex. We speak incorrectly and superficially about sexuality. And when you talk about it too much, you run the risk of destroying its mystery.

  • I will always be referred to as a theorist, but I was only a fellow traveller with a degree.

  • I'm reminded of a female patient who was particularly aroused by the shape of her husband's shoulder. And this hint of perversion should ideally remain a secret for both partners.

  • Key feature of sexual revolution is the large-scale publication and commercialization of details that were once secret. Sexuality has been trivialized. The interesting thing about this is that exaggerated portrayals apparently destroy desire more effectively than any repression.

  • Most pornographic images are simply too repulsive.

  • Most young people seem to be behaving very intelligently: They look at things once in a while, but then they find it so idiotic and uncool that they just look away again. That is, provided they're not growing up in a family in which a drunk father is already watching pornos in the morning.

  • Sexual desire declines after four to seven years. That's been proven.

  • Sexuality is pushed back more and more and people try to replace what they've lost with other forms of excitement.

  • The sexual revolution produced cultural convulsions that were unparalleled in the 20th century.

  • The things that could be derived from the sexual sphere - happiness, endless fun and the end of capitalism - were grossly overestimated. The symbolic overglorification was downright unbearable.

  • The traits of our sexual culture are still speechlessness, loneliness, violence and not enough desire and love.

  • There are pedosexuals who, even if the court forces them to go into treatment, do not pursue it or cannot pursue it.

  • There are young men who want thrills but no longer value sex, so they do completely different things, including aggressive things.

  • There will be other forms in addition to our classic marriage. One is already looming on the horizon: polyamory, or having more than one intimate partner.

  • When it comes to sexuality, people like to tell lies. It's only when it comes to money that they lie more.

  • With an intelligent couple, it ought to be possible for the husband or wife to look for satisfaction outside the relationship - while always taking the partner into consideration, meaning acting openly but still discreetly.

  • You're married to a woman who has no objection to another woman joining the couple. Then she brings in her boyfriend. Suddenly you realize - my God! - you can love more than one person. In fact, you can love several people at the same time.

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