Eric Andre quotes:

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  • 'The Simpsons' is like Charlie Parker or Marlon Brando or Richard Pryor: Comedy couldn't go back to the way it was after 'The Simpsons' came out.

  • I've never seen 'The Goonies.' I've never seen 'Indiana Jones.' I watched 'UHF' over and over again when I was little, and that was it. I had no time for any other movies. I watched 'Naked Gun,' 'UHF,' and 'Airplane!' over and over.

  • ABC is owned by Disney, so it's a little more conservative than Adult Swim. Polar opposites.

  • Hannibal Burress is my polar opposite in energy. I can be crazy, and he grounds the 'Eric Andre Show.'

  • I like Velvet Underground, but I was never really hardcore into them. I like them, and I like Nico, but I won't front like I'm super knowledgeable. I just never got around to it.

  • Bill Cosby spoke out against The Simpsons and there was this kind of evangelical, right-wing sect that was against The Simpsons. Fox was a new network at the time, though, so they were going to take risks.

  • I loved 'Space Ghost' when I was in college.

  • I just grew up with it [The Simpsons]. The first season came on when I was 5, 6 years old, and the show evolved as I was growing up and got funnier and funnier and, by the time I was in 12th grade, they were at their funniest.

  • Its consistency of what comedy can do and what comedy can be.Growing up with that show [The Simpsons] shaped my worldview.

  • I don't really know how music and comedy are similar. I try never to dissect it theoretically or academically.

  • I was a class clown since second grade.

  • I have a karaoke punk band called The Ungrateful Dead, but we don't exist yet.

  • I'm insecure, and I need the validation of strangers to feel whole. So, I need every single racist 12-year-old on the Internet to like me, or I don't feel complete.

  • I'm an elderly Jewish lesbian trapped in a 33 year old nerd's body.

  • I was eating beans by candle light for a decade.

  • I used to be a Geico Caveman for live events. I was a corporate mascot. It was the silliest job. It was actually awesome and fun, but it was retarded.

  • You can't really feel the direct change from one president to another versus people closer to you in local elections.

  • A hole is a hole has always been my motto.

  • From 'Chappelle's Show' to 'Tosh.0,' there's so much race comedy. It's overdone.

  • I'm a lurker and a creep. Women don't like me because I sleep standing up, like a horse.

  • Like I said, a sketch is one joke. They shouldn't really be more than a minute, two minutes. There are some shows where the sketch goes on for five minutes. It's like, "I get it! I'm already bored. I did like the joke, but I don't anymore, because you went on too long."

  • I will smoke crack before I die. I want to see what all the hubbub is about.

  • I think everyone is bi, right? There's no such thing as sexual orientation, or race, or gender. Those are all obsolete man-made concepts.

  • I think we give human beings too much credit. We're primates, you know.

  • The president is the country's scapegoat more than the country's leader; the president has as much power as we think the president has. Whoever has the most money is the puppet master.

  • I feel like we put all the weight on the president, rather than distributing the weight to all of the elected officials.

  • Wonder Showzen was one of the first shows that realized each sketch, each segment is essentially one joke, and, once you know what the joke is, it's time to move on.

  • I care a lot; I'm very sensitive.

  • You see a lot of sketch variety shows where each segment is one joke that they repeat over and over and over again, and the sketches are always three or four minutes too long.

  • I think part of it is the fact that they were kind of the first of its kind - there weren't a lot of cartoons for adults. People forget at the time that The Simpsons started out, it was controversial - the fact that they said "hell" and "damn" in a cartoon was a lot. America was in an uproar.

  • Wonder Showzen is one of my favorite shows of all time. When I first saw it, I thought it was so funny and new and original and edgy and insane and subversive. I didn't know comedy could do that.

  • You can make fun of your own a lot easier than someone else's.

  • There's two sides to the coin. I think I'm much happier that [Barack] Obama won over John McCain or Mitt Romney, because I think Obama did something culturally for the country.

  • How many n-bombs are dropped? It depends on what I post.

  • I'm an Aries. I need everybody to like me.

  • Do you think we're going to hit a tipping point and the world's going to end?

  • I can't tell if the world is worse now or if we just have more cameras. There are cameras everywhere, so now the world knows how bad the world is.

  • I think that we put too much weight on who the president is.

  • If the crowd is full of assholes, it's no fun. If the crowd is cool, it's great.

  • Before The Simpsons, I was 4 years old, so I don't know exactly what I was thinking before that.

  • I think if the joke is in good taste - it's a good joke.

  • The Simpsons was pretty experimental at the time, but it attracted a lot of sitcom writers that felt confined by the limitations of live-action sitcoms in the '80s.

  • All motivation is defined by intention. If the intention is to hurt, divide, or belittle, it's wrong; if it's an attempt to cope with or make sense of tragedy, it's something different. If it's commenting on society's flaws, versus adding to society's flaws, I think the audience can tell.

  • If there's an intelligence behind the joke - - it's a good joke.

  • When I'm watching South Park I don't think it's written by neo-Nazis. They know exactly what they're doing.

  • I do think homophobia in the '80s was more rampant and socially acceptable.

  • I'm not a very good actor, so I break character all the time.

  • [The people that worked on The Simpsons] just had good taste. They knew how to execute absurd jokes.

  • They [ The Simpsons] are just like the Bible to me as far as what the high-water mark of comedy.

  • I don't think comedians take advantage of the fact that television and film are visual mediums.

  • Let's hit the joke once and move on to the next joke and just keep it where we have as many jokes per square inch as possible.

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