Bernie Brillstein quotes:

Because I'm fat, people believe I'm somehow vulnerable and easy to handle in a negotiation. Ever try to negotiate with a fat guy? We can be mean: Marvin Davis, Harvey Weinstein, Hermann Goering. No one screws around with us for long.

Outcomes rarely turn on grand gestures or the art of the deal, but on whether you've sent someone a thank-you note.

The alumni of Second City from John Belushi to Martin Short have changed my entire life and brought a new kind of comedy to America and the World.

Consider this 're-make' business that is taking away opportunities for new ideas and new films to happen. If the movie was made right the first time, why make it again? The only reason this is happening is it has become a safer way for the Studios.

What a pleasure it is to be in business with BASE. I'm impressed with the honesty, integrity and efficiency with which they operate. The next show I do and represent, I will be doing with them all over again.

In a world where celebrity equals talent, and where make-believe is called reality, it is most important to have real love, truth and stability in your life.

Management is like making love. There's heat from both sides. You have an instinct to get there. You have no idea what you're really in for, but you do it anyway.

Coming from the William Morris mailroom as I have, this book is the truth of what I experienced, and it reminded me of all the fun and craziness and fake drama that trained me for this profession. It's hilarious, a bit crazy, and it should make anyone wonder why people put their careers in the hands of these idiotsand remember I'm one of them. If you have a child, make sure he or she reads this before starting at the bottom- anywhere.