Zibby Quotes in Liberal Arts (2012)

Zibby: So, what was your major?

Jesse Fisher: I was English, with a minor in history, just to make sure I was fully unemployable.

Jesse Fisher: I believe in consequences.

Zibby: No, you believe in guilt.

Jesse Fisher: Maybe. But guilt before we act is called morality.

Zibby: [about vampire novel] I liked it. It was fun and stupid. And it passed the time. And it's not Tolstoy, but it's also not television. And it made me happy. Now you...

Jesse Fisher: Thank you... This - is the worst book - ever - written - in English.

Zibby: So there are worse books written in other languages?

Jesse Fisher: Probably not. Unless this book is translated into other languages.

Zibby: Try not to over-think things, okay?

Jesse Fisher: Ah, you're talking to the wrong guy.

Zibby: Well, look. We connect really well, don't you think?

Jesse Fisher: We do, yeah. I just can't figure out if it's because you're advanced, or because I'm stunted.

Zibby: It's because I'm advanced.

Jesse Fisher: Maybe. But I'm also a little stunted.

Jesse Fisher: I feel different now than I felt when I was here, and I hate to break this to you, but so will you.

Zibby: So you're saying things suck? I should prepare myself for suckiness?

Jesse Fisher: No, a liberal arts education solves all your problems.

Zibby: Thank God!

Zibby: I sometimes feel like I'm looking down on myself. Like there's this older, wiser me watching over this 19-year-old rough draft, who's full of all this potential, but has to live more to catch up with that other self somehow. And, uh, I know I'll get there. It's just sometimes I think I want to rush the process, you know? And I don't know, maybe, um - maybe I thought you were some sort of shortcut. Does that make any sense?

Jesse Fisher: If I wrote you, I would be like, "This is the best rough draft ever."

Zibby: How can you hate something if you've never read it? I mean, isn't that like what repressive regimes do? You want to burn books you don't like?

Zibby: It doesn't bother me.

Jesse Fisher: Well, it bothers me.

Zibby: Well, it shouldn't. Age is a stupid thing to obsess over. What if reincarnation is real, huh? Think about that, What if I am like thousands of years older than you?

Jesse Fisher: Okay, that's not really a sound argument.

Zibby: Why not?

Jesse Fisher: Because it's like saying what if reality is all an illusion, then there are no consequences to anything, we're completely off the hook... and I believe in consequences.

Zibby: No, you believe in guilt.

Jesse Fisher: Maybe, but guilt before we act is called morality.

Nat: Do you drink coffee?

Zibby: Yeah...?

Nat: What? That's crazy! So does my friend here. You two, tomorrow. Schhp... coffee.

Zibby: Yeah, I could do that. Are you in too?

Jesse Fisher: Um, I...

[Nat gives him a boost]

Jesse Fisher: Uh, yeah, that'd be... that's great. Nine o'clock okay?

Zibby: [laughs, then realizes] Oh, you're serious? Is, uh, 11:30 okay...?

Jesse Fisher: Uh, yeah... yeah, that works...