Wally Sparks Quotes in Meet Wally Sparks (1997)

Wally Sparks: I hear in Canada you only have sex doggy style; that way you can both see the hockey game.

Wally Sparks: Siskel and Ebert caught my show. They gave me one finger up.

Wally Sparks: The other day I saved a girl from being attacked: I changed my mind.

Wally Sparks: What a place, Canada; they started a country and no one showed up.

Wally Sparks: Remember folks, every man has his tale of woe. Unfortunately, in life, there's more woe than tale.

Wally Sparks: I looked up your family tree. Two dogs were using it.

Wally Sparks: And remember, it's lonely at the top, when there's no one on the bottom.

Wally Sparks: I am here to spread Joy, tell me when you find her.

Wally Sparks: You never had me.