Voice of Documentarian Quotes in Drop Dead Gorgeous (1999)

Voice of Documentarian: [Gladys has just thought of a theme for the pageant: Proud to be an American] So what was the theme of the pageant last year?

Gladys Leeman: Oh, that was "Buy American"

Voice of Documentarian: And the year before that was...?

Gladys Leeman: "USA is A-OK!"

Voice of Documentarian: And can you remember the theme of your favorite pageant?

Gladys Leeman: Can I? "Amer-I-Can!" People ask me where I get this, I don't know, it's... maybe a gift from God or somethin'.

Voice of Documentarian: Do you think that most people would say that teenage beauty pageants are a good idea?

Gladys Leeman: Oh yeah, sure. I know what some of your big city, no-bra-wearing, hairy-legged women libbers might say. They might say that a pageant is old-fashioned and demeaning to the girls.

Iris Clark: What's sick is women dressing like men.

Gladys Leeman: You betcha, Iris. No, I think you boys are gonna find something a litle bit different here in Mount Rose. For one thing, we're all God-fearing folk, every last one of us. And you will not find a "back room" in our video store. No, no, that filth is better left to the sin cities.

Iris Clark: AKA Minneapolis Saint Paul.

Voice of Documentarian: So you've, uh, you've judged a lot of pageants over the years?

John: No, no, no way, no. Never judged a pageant before in my life. Mm-mm. No way. Never been around young girls. I mean, even if I was, I mean, why would I wanna be, y'know? I-I don't get off on that kinda thing and that's really why you're askin', right?

[pause]

John: Someone say somethin'?

Voice of Documentarian: So, just tell us your name, and why you're signing up for the pageant.

Leslie Miller: Ok... Hi... I'm Leslie Miller... and I'm signing up 'cause... oh... I always watch the pageants on TV and my boyfriend thinks I'll win

[cuts to Leslie and her boyfriend making out]

Leslie Miller: Hi Pat. GO MUSKIES WOO!

Voice of Documentarian: What makes you so sure that Becky's gonna win?

Loretta: Why do I think she'll win? You're talking about-

[to Annette]

Loretta: Ow, don't pinch! You're talking about the most famous family in Mount Rose. Its front page news when one of them takes a shit!