Violet Newstead Quotes in 9 to 5 (1980)

[a candy-striper, with a 'Buffy' nametag, approaches Violet who's hauling a dead corpse on a gurny under a sheet]

Buffy: Excuse me. Could you tell me where the coffee shop is?

Violet Newstead: [nervous tone] The what?

Buffy: The coffee shop.

Violet Newstead: The coffee shop? No, I'm new here, I don't drink coffee.

Buffy: I'm new here too. Where do you work?

Violet Newstead: Uh... downstairs.

Buffy: In the morgue?

Violet Newstead: [nervous tone] Yes, that's right!

Buffy: [looks at the body on the gurny] How did he... ?

Violet Newstead: Coffee... too much coffee. I'm just taking him out for some air. Uh, I mean fresh air for me, he's just coming along for the ride.

[Buffy gasps]

Violet Newstead: *What?*

Buffy: Oh, you're a doctor! I'm sorry, I didn't see your badge.

[Violet looks at the badge and finally realizes that the white lab coat she's stolen is a doctor's]

Violet Newstead: Oh yeah... I'm a doctor. So why the hell am I talking to you? Piss off!

Violet Newstead: One thing you should know about dear old Roz... She's the eyes, ears, nose, and throat of Mr. Hart. Anything she hears, he hears.

Judy Bernly: You mean she's a... a company spy?

Violet Newstead: I wouldn't exactly say that, I'd just say that if you want to gossip in the ladies' room, I'd check under the stalls, first, for her shoes.

Judy Bernly: What did you say it was called?

[Passes joint to Violet]

Violet Newstead: Maui Wowee!

Judy Bernly: Well, I love it!

Violet Newstead: It's *primo!*

Violet Newstead: Okay, I'm gonna leave, but let me tell you one thing before I go: don't you *ever* refer to me as "your girl" again.

Franklin Hart, Jr.: What in God's name are you talking about?

[Doralee enters]

Franklin Hart, Jr.: Doralee, now what are we gonna do about this chair?

Violet Newstead: I'll tell you *exactly* what I'm talking about: I'm no girl; I'm a woman, do you hear me? I'm not your wife - thank God - or your mother...

[gesturing toward Doralee]

Violet Newstead: ... or even your mistress.

Doralee Rhodes: What do you mean, *mistress*?

Violet Newstead: I am your *employee* and, as such, I expect to be treated with certain things called DIGNITY and EQUALITY and RESPECT!

Doralee Rhodes: Now, y'all just hold on... What's this "mistress" stuff?

Violet Newstead: Doralee, come off it already. The whole office knows you two are having an affair.

Doralee Rhodes: WHO'S BEEN SAYING WE'RE HAVING AN AFFAIR?

Violet Newstead: Who do you think?

[gestures toward Hart, then slams out of the office]

Doralee Rhodes: So! You've been telling everybody I'm sleeping with you, huh? Well, that explains why these people treat me like some dime-store floozy. They all think I'm screwing the boss!

Franklin Hart, Jr.: That's not it at all...!

Doralee Rhodes: Oh, and you just love it, don't you! It gives you some sort of cheap thrill!

Franklin Hart, Jr.: Doralee, let's not get excited here...

Doralee Rhodes: Get your scummy hands off me. Look, I've been straight with you since the first day I got here. And I've put up will all your groping and ogling and hollow apologies, and with being chased around the desk, because I need this job. BUT THIS IS THE LAST STRAW!

Franklin Hart, Jr.: Now, why don't we just sit down and...

Doralee Rhodes: Look, I've got a gun out there in my purse. And until now, I've been forgiving and forgetting because of the way I was brought up. But I tell you this: If you ever say another word about me or make another indecent proposal, I'm gonna get that gun of mine... And I'm gonna change you from a bishop to a rabbi with one shot!

[calls back over her shoulder while storming out of the office]

Doralee Rhodes: DON'T THINK I CAN'T DO IT!

[slams the door and then keeps going]

Doralee Rhodes: I need a drink, Roz. I'm taking the rest of the day off.

Violet Newstead: He wants to prosecute.

Doralee Rhodes: Well why wouldn't he? He's got you for poisoning him, and me for roping him, and *you* for acting like he was first prize at a turkey shoot!

Doralee Rhodes: That's just great! We just waltz into the hospital and say, "We're sorry, we made a mistake." Well, maybe they'll give us Hart's body in exchange!

Violet Newstead: There is no need to get sarcastic!

Violet Newstead: Oh, God. They know about the rat poison. I might as well just turn myself in.

Doralee Rhodes: Violet, it was an accident.

Violet Newstead: I'm a murderer.

Judy Bernly: No, you're not.

Violet Newstead: I'm a murderess. I'm gonna go to the pen. My poor kids. I'm gonna lose my job.

Judy Bernly: Violet, stop this.

Violet Newstead: I'm no fool. I've killed the boss, you think they're not gonna fire me for a thing like that?

Violet Newstead: What could we use to keep Hart quiet?

Judy Bernly: Blackmail?

Violet Newstead: Blackmail, oh that sounds good! What could we get on him...?

Judy Bernly: A sex scandal! Take a picture of him in bed with a prositute.

Doralee Rhodes: No, who'd care?

Violet Newstead: Yeah, Hart would just buy up all the copies and then distribute them as Christmas cards.

Violet Newstead: What are you, a man or a mouse? I mean, a woman or a wouse?

Violet Newstead: [sees Roz approaching] Uh oh... here comes General Patton.

Doralee Rhodes: [stepping out from behind the car after seeing that the wrong corpse is in the trunk of the car] Uh, Judy? Would you come back here for a second?

Judy Bernly: What?

Doralee Rhodes: Look.

Judy Bernly: Who's that?

Doralee Rhodes: I don't know.

Judy Bernly: Where's Hart?

Doralee Rhodes: I don't know.

Judy Bernly: Oh, my God, you mean she... *oh my god!*

Doralee Rhodes: [stepping out from beind the car] Violet, honey, would you come over here for a second?

Violet Newstead: What is the matter with you two? We have got to get the - who is that?

[Violet, planning to get rid of a dead corpse from the hospital that she thinks is Hart's body, drives crazily and speeds along the highway with Doralee and Judy in the car with her]

Judy Bernly: Where's the body?

Violet Newstead: In the trunk! Look, all we have to do is get some cement blocks, chain them to his feet and pitch him off the end of the pier, and no one will ever know.

Doralee Rhodes: You are crazy! They'll find it, they always find it!

Violet Newstead: Oh-hoh, crazy am I? They never found Jimmy Hoffa!

[the captive Franklin Hart, tied down to his bed, has just been informed by the ladies about finding a company owned warehouse empty]

Franklin Hart, Jr.: An empty warehouse? What's wrong with that?

Violet Newstead: That's what Billy Sol Estes said, and they gave him 15 years for embezzlement.

Judy Bernly: That warehouse is supposed to be filled with inventory from Consolidated.

Doralee Rhodes: But you sold it, and you pocketed the money.

Franklin Hart, Jr.: You'll never be able to prove that.

Violet Newstead: Well, I am going to order the invoices from the head office on Monday. I think you'll see the light when they arrive.

Franklin Hart, Jr.: [getting angry] You start tangling with me and you'd better be prepared to play very rough. I am not going to be stopped by three dim-witted broads! I'm going to get...

[struggling against the ropes]

Franklin Hart, Jr.: I'm gonna get loose. I'm gonna get loose even if I have to kill someone to do it!

[Violet's fantasy - she's Snow White and Hart is the villain]

Violet Newstead: Your coffee, Mr. Hart.

[Hart drinks the coffee, steam comes from his ears, he screams and his head spins around on his neck]

Franklin Hart, Jr.: I think there was something in that coffee.

Violet Newstead: I think you're right.

Franklin Hart, Jr.: I think it was poison.

Violet Newstead: Right again.

Franklin Hart, Jr.: I think you did it.

Violet Newstead: [singing] Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

[sticks tongue out]

Franklin Hart, Jr.: Why?

Violet Newstead: Why do you think?

Franklin Hart, Jr.: Because I'm a sexist, egotistical, lying, hypocritical bigot?

Violet Newstead: Bingo.

Violet Newstead: [about Judy] But Norman, she has never worked a day in her life before.

Norman Lane: I thought you'd be sympathetic.

Violet Newstead: I am sympathetic, Norman, but please, why do I have to train her? Let her go work in somebody else's section.

Norman Lane: She's very willing and she needs the job, she's recently divorced.

Violet Newstead: So, and I'm a widow with 4 kids; Jerry should have never died, I could - I'd have been better off, I could have divorced him. Is that her?

Norman Lane: Yes.

Violet Newstead: We're gonna need a special locker for the hat.

Roz: Here, Violet, you can put this up on the bulletin board.

Violet Newstead: Thanks, Roz, I know just where to *stick* it.

Violet Newstead: I have to go shopping. We're running out of everything: cat food, fish food, ant spray, rat poison.

Roz: Did you get my memo?

Violet Newstead: [ambiguously] I did, Roz. I tore right through it.

Doralee Rhodes: Is that one of those marijuana cigarettes?

Violet Newstead: [Under her breath] We don't have enough for everyone, cool it!

Judy Bernly: [the girls have stolen the wrong body from the hospital] Oh, this is terrible. It's so improper. It's so disrespectful!

Violet Newstead: He's dead! He doesn't mind!

Violet Newstead: [getting high with the other two women and discussing Hart] I don't think I could ever shoot a gun, I don't care... I can't understand guys like Hart, who go out and shoot things, like Bambi and Thumper... and that cute little skunk?

Violet Newstead: I guess I must've made a mistake.

Doralee Rhodes: You steal the wrong body from the hospital and all you can say is I must have made a mistake!

Violet Newstead: It could happen to anyone.

Violet Newstead: [Hart has recently stolen Violet's plan for color-coding CC's accounts, presenting said plan as his own; Violet let him do so, hoping that he'll compensate by giving her a promotion scheduled for the near future. But, instead... ] ... How dare you give that promotion to *Bob Enright* instead of me! I've got *five years* seniority over him!

Franklin Hart, Jr.: I know that. Don't go flying off the handle, now...

Violet Newstead: For Chrissakes, I *trained* him - just like I trained *you*!

Franklin Hart, Jr.: I know that, too, but the Company...

Violet Newstead: Don't you give me that song-and-dance about the Company! It was *your* decision; *you* promoted him; just tell me why.

Franklin Hart, Jr.: First of all, Bob does have a college degree...

Violet Newstead: What kind? Is it a Master's Degree, like mine? Or is it just a Bachelor's Degree?

Franklin Hart, Jr.: ...It's an Associate's Degree.

Violet Newstead: Oh, *brilliant*! While he's earning his pathetic little *Associate's* Degree, I'm working my hands to the bone for this Company!

Violet Newstead: Second of all, Bob does have a wife and a newborn child to support...

Violet Newstead: And *I'm* just a *widow*, with *four teenagers*? Since when does that make a difference, anyhow? Especially to you; you can't stand kids! That's not exactly classified information around here.

Franklin Hart, Jr.: Violet. My hands are tied here. *The Company needs a MAN in this position*. Surveys show that clients would rather deal with men when it comes to figures.

Violet Newstead: Oh, now I get it. I lose a promotion because of some idiotic, biased *survey*. The Boys in the Club are all threatened and intimidated by any woman who doesn't ride at the back of the proverbial bus.

Franklin Hart, Jr.: Spare me the Women's Lib crap, all right? Now, I know how you feel, and I understand.

Violet Newstead: How could you understand, when you've never been passed over for being the wrong gender?