Vicar Quotes in For Your Eyes Only (1981)

[first lines]

Vicar: Mr. Bond, Mr. Bond. I'm so glad I caught you. Your office called. They're sending a helicopter to pick you up. Some sort of emergency.

James Bond: It usually is. Thank you.

Vicar: Right. The winner of this amazing prize is: 9-1-9.

Mr. Bean: [looks at his card but sees it upside down and thinks it is 616] Oh!

[He throws the card in the air]

Vicar: Nine one nine. Anybody have ticket 919? If there is no claimant, I'll have to pick another ticket from the bucket. Anyone?

Mr. Bean: [sees his card again but right side up] Wait wait!

[first lines]

Vicar: Three-one. Thirty-one.

Mrs. Lucas: Over here!

Vicar: Ah, Mrs. Lucas! Congratulations, Mrs. Lucas. And now to the first prize in today's raffle in aid of the "roof appeal." Thank you, Lily. Indeed. The magnificent holiday to the south of France, kindly sponsored by Dalesborough Travel Limited. So, thank you, guys. The winner of this prize will travel by Eurostar train to Paris, then catch the fast train south before spending the week on the beaches of the French Riviera. This fabulous prize also includes 200 euros spending money and, Barbara, this wonderful video camera, kindly donated by A&K Electrics of Arbor Road. So thank you. Right. The winner of this amazing prize is: 9-1-9. Nine one nine. Anybody have ticket 919? If there is no claimant, I'll have to pick another ticket from the bucket. Anyone?

Mrs. Worrall: What makes you think she's Turkish?

Vicar: Oh, her hat, ma'am.

Vicar: Oh, Mr. Rudd. I understand that you are a fillum producer.

Jason Rudd: Oh, no, sir. A director.

Vicar: Is there any difference?

Jason Rudd: Yes, sir. The, uh, producer supplies all the money; the director spends it. Then the producer yells that the director is spending too much money; the director doesn't pay any attention, and goes right on spending. The director gets all the credit; the producer gets an ulcer. You see, it's all very simple; excuse me.

[last lines]

Vicar: We, in this quiet corner of England, have suffered the loss of friends very dear to us - some close to this church: George West, choir boy; James Bellard, station master and bell ringer and a proud winner, only one hour before his death, of the Belding Cup for his beautiful Miniver rose; and our hearts go out in sympathy to the two families who share the cruel loss of a young girl who was married at this altar only two weeks ago. The homes of many of us have been destroyed, and the lives of young and old have been taken. There is scarcely a household that hasn't been struck to the heart. And why? Surely you must have asked yourself this question. Why in all conscience should these be the ones to suffer? Children, old people, a young girl at the height of her loveliness. Why these? Are these our soldiers? Are these our fighters? Why should they be sacrificed? I shall tell you why. Because this is not only a war of soldiers in uniform. It is a war of the people, of all the people, and it must be fought not only on the battlefield, but in the cities and in the villages, in the factories and on the farms, in the home, and in the heart of every man, woman, and child who loves freedom! Well, we have buried our dead, but we shall not forget them. Instead they will inspire us with an unbreakable determination to free ourselves and those who come after us from the tyranny and terror that threaten to strike us down. This is the people's war! It is our war! We are the fighters! Fight it then! Fight it with all that is in us, and may God defend the right!

[the congregation stand and sing "Onward Christian Soldiers", which then segues into an orchestral rendition of "Pomp and Circumstance"]

Vicar: [to Lady Beldon who has just entered the railway compartment he is already sharing with Mrs. Miniver] Good evening, Lady Beldon.

Lady Beldon: Good evening, vicar. Oh, oh, shopping's absolutely impossible nowadays! You can't get near the counter and when you do, they haven't got it and you pay twice as much for it.

Vicar: [laughs] What a wonderful description!

Lady Beldon: [to her servant] Sit down, Simmons, and don't snip!

[to the vicar]

Lady Beldon: My dear man, I spent the whole afternoon being pushed around by middle-class females buying things they can't possibly afford.

Kay Miniver: Oh dear, that means me.

Lady Beldon: Oh no, much worse!