Uniform Cop Quotes in Grand Theft Parsons (2003)

Larry Oster-Berg: So what'cha doing here?

Larry Oster-Berg: We're, uh, meeting someone off a flight.

Uniform Cop: You're meeting someone off of a flight?

Larry Oster-Berg: Yes.

Uniform Cop: In a hearse?

Larry Oster-Berg: Yes. It's a, surprise.

Uniform Cop: Which part's the surprise, um, the fact that you're in a bright yellow hearse? The fact that you look like something out of a horror film? Or, the fact, that you're a half mile away from the terminal and they're gonna have to walk across two runways to reach you?

Larry Oster-Berg: The first part.

Uniform Cop: Wherever there's a hippie, there's a crime, even if that crime hasn't happened yet. That's what I always say.

Uniform Cop: You missed a gap 50 yards wide and hit a wall... IN BROAD DAYLIGHT!