Torrente Quotes in Torrente 4 (2011)

[subtitled version]

Torrente: [to a waiter carrying a tray] Whaddaya got?

Camarero boda: Macallan or Cardhu.

Torrente: Here we go... store brands... Serve me a bit of both.

[subtitled version]

Torrente: [talking to a statue of El Fary] Since you passed on, things aren't the same, Fary. Spain has gone to the dogs. The whole world is on the fritz. Queers can get married now, the Socialists have flushed Spain down the tubes, and in the White House, there's a jungle-bunny, but not a cleaning man, no... he's the president! It's like a joke. What's next, a broad? Yeah, I know we won the World Cup last year, but that doesn't count. Most of the players were barely Spanish. What do you think?

[subtitled version]

Torrente: In Colombia and third-world countries from the third world, they'll kill you for a watch, and in some places for a crust of bread. Luckily, we're in Spain, where a person's life has higher value. They said they'd pay 30,000 euros for this job. Fifty million pesetas in old currency!

[subtitled version]

[in a car, during a surveillance operation]

Torrente: This is the worst part of surveillance, kid. The down-time, I mean, what do you do?... Should we try word jumbles? or crosswords?

Julito Rin Rin: What if we jerk off 50-50?

Torrente: You mean each other?

Julito Rin Rin: No, Torrente, to each his own.

Torrente: Monogamy strikes again!

[subtitled version]

Julito Rin Rin: [Rin Rin is pasting word cutouts on a paper] Look Torrente, an anonymous note. I've seen these in the movies.

Torrente: Great, let me sign it.

[he writes his full name on the note]

Torrente: Something's wrong... if we mail it, they'll take forever to answer.

Torrente: And I don't hit you because I know you like it!

[subtitled version]

[first lines]

Torrente: Luisito!

Barman: Torrente! What's it gonna be?

Torrente: The usual.

[subtitled version]

Torrente: [after drinking more than 8 glasses of whisky] Got the time?

Barman: Midnight. One more?

Torrente: No. I've just started my shift.

[subtitled version]

[last lines]

Torrente: Let's go guys! To Torremolinos! Torrente's paying!

[subtitled version]

Torrente: [to Rafi, after snorting some cocaine] Want some?

Rafi: Drugs, right?

Torrente: Damn right.

Rafi: But it's bad.

Torrente: What's bad about it? Here's a drug. Does it bite? Scratch? Grab your balls? What's so bad?

[subtitled version]

Torrente: [about washing hands in a bathroom] After? Look, kid. Some men washem before they piss. Some wash after. I wash before. Why? My cock is sacred. It should be worshipped. It's the earth core, the hosepipe to happiness. Do the same.

[subtitled version]

[in a car, during a surveillance operation]

Torrente: This is the worst part. Waiting for things to happen. Wanna jerk off?

Rafi: [baffled] What?

Torrente: Jerk each other off.

Rafi: You and me?

Torrente: Of course!

Rafi: Now?

Torrente: For fun. You stroke me and I stroke you. Just to relax, no queer shit. Nothing queer.

Torrente: I'm a policeman, I'm Spanish and I'm a fucking killing machine!

[subtitled version]

[last lines]

[while running away from the White House]

Torrente: I can't take you guys out of Spain.

Juan Francisco: Don José Luis!

Josito: Torrente!

Pepito: Dad!

[subtitled version]

Abuela: Do you remember Manoli?

Torrente: The whore?

[Grandma hits Torrente with a cane]

Abuela: Watch your mouth, faggot!

[subtitled version]

Torrente: I've got a very strict ethic and moral code, a code which has always governed my life. It's caused me problems. But, Parrondo, I'm a man of principles.

Torrente: [farts loudly]

Torrente: Right to the end.

[subtitled version]

[in a car, during a surveillance operation]

Torrente: It's very quiet, isn't it? How's about we jerk each other off?

Juan Francisco: [appalled] What do you mean, sir? Do you think we're homosexuals?

Torrente: [upset] Hey, have a bit of respect! I didn't insult you! Look, you're a man, right?

Juan Francisco: Of course.

Torrente: And you beat the meat?

Juan Francisco: Almost every day.

Torrente: So a man touches your dick.

Juan Francisco: Yes.

Torrente: That doesn't make you a faggot.

Juan Francisco: No.

Torrente: That's it. You're saying I'm right. Come on, get it out. You'll like it!

[subtitled version]

Torrente: Camuñas, are we rats or are we men?

Camuñas: We're men, sir.

Torrente: No, we're not men.

Camuñas: Rats?

Torrente: We're supermen.

[subtitled version]

[during a car chase]

Torrente: Step on it, kid! You won't lose your license for this.

Josito: What license?