Vending machine quotes:

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My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine. -- Caroline Rhea
I like vending machines, because snacks are better when they fall. -- Mitch Hedberg
One simply turns to the ideological vending machine, and out comes the prepared formulae. -- Daniel Bell
I want to make a vending machine that sells vending machines. It'd have to be real big. -- Mitch Hedberg
We need to reform our school lunch programs. We need to get healthy items into the vending machines. -- Joan Lunden
Bragging that you had sex with a prostitute is like bragging that you got Doritos out of a vending machine. -- Natasha Leggero
I don't see the government as a beverage vending machine, where anyone who happens to be thirsty can grab a drink. -- Mathias Dopfner
Wait a minute, words in the prompter, script on my desk, vending machine upstairs out of Funyuns... the writers are back! -- Jon Stewart
God is not a vending machine where if you put in enough prayer quarters we get a Reese's Pieces bag that pops out. -- Joel C. Rosenberg
It's safe to assume that by 2085 guns will be sold in vending machines but you won't be able to smoke anywhere in America. -- David Sedaris
Male sexual response is far brisker and more automatic. It is triggered easily by things - like putting a quarter in a vending machine. -- Alex Comfort
We made love like two sand dollars in a vending machine. She said she wanted marriage and kids, and I said all I wanted was a soda. -- Jarod Kintz
I want to get a vending machine, with fun sized candy bars, and the glass in front is a magnifying glass. You'll be mad, but it will be too late. -- Mitch Hedberg
Have you ever tried thinking of God as a person instead of an all-powerful vending machine that never gives you the right amount of change? He has feelings too, you know. -- Angela N. Blount
I turned around and headed back to the stairwell, planning to go downstairs and buy a chocolate bar from the vending machine. Maybe it would fall on me and end my misery. -- Kenneth Oppel
I like vending machines, because snacks are better when they fall. If I buy a candy bar at the store, oftentimes I will drop it so that is achieves its maximum flavor potential. -- Mitch Hedberg
I'd watch my father get up at 5 o'clock and go down to the Eastern Market in Detroit to do the shopping for his restaurant, and get that business going and then go out on his vending machine business. -- Ed Bradley
When all of your decisions are based on economics, you end up with a sameness of vision. You're not taking the risks, you're not exploiting the passions of your creators. You're manufacturing product for a huge vending machine. -- Steven Bochco
Congress, 535 commoditized temple monkeys pawing through the ruins of America in search of bribes. The bicameral whorehouse on Capitol Hill works like a vending machine. You put coins in the slot, select your law, and the desired legislation slides out. -- Fred Reed
Vanessa Sky Ellis scours the streets of NYC looking for celebrities to take selfies with, while I scrounge up quarters to try to buy love out of vending machines. I have had sex with more plastic bottles than I care to take pictures of. -- Jarod Kintz
The culture is about moving to a place where tobacco and smoking isn't part of normal life: people don't encounter it normally, they don't see it in their big supermarkets, they don't see people smoking in public places, they don't see tobacco vending machines. -- Andrew Lansley
I am big in Japan... heightwise! But, yeah, I started modeling there in my teens and into my 20s. I did Calvin Klein, Uniqlo, and lots of magazine covers. It's such a beautiful country, and they have beer vending machines right on the street. Love that! -- Julia Voth
I'm not sure I knew what an entrepreneur was when I was ten, but I knew that starting little businesses and trying to sell greeting cards or newspapers door-to-door or just vending machine kind of thing is.. there's just something very intriguing to me about that. -- Steve Case
You can use the Internet to find out, from anywhere on the planet: exactly how much coffee is in a certain coffee machine at Cambridge University in England; exactly how many sodas are available in certain vending machines at certain major universities; and much, much more. -- Dave Barry
We believe that God is like a giant vending machine in the sky. We put in our requests in the form of prayers, and then the vending machine dispenses these prayers based upon how well we've followed the rules that someone else has told us are God's rules. -- Wayne Dyer
Parents have a right to expect that their efforts at home won't be undone each day in the school cafeteria or in the vending machine in the hallway. ...Parents have a right to expect that their kids will be served fresh, healthy food that meets high nutritional standards. -- Michelle Obama
We need election reform because our elections are being stolen. And these huge powerful voting machine vending companies have privatized the election process in our country. -- Robert F. Kennedy, Jr.
Vending Machine: "This product has no known nutritional value and may cause irritability or wakefulness in some individuals. Please enjoy your selection and your day." Eve: "Up yours. -- Nora Roberts

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