Two year old quotes:

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I have a two year old. Just turned two a couple weeks ago, and he is my main man, he is my shadow. Every spare second, I am hanging with him. -- Rodney Atkins
I'm like a twenty two year old kid in a new band trying to get noticed and break through, because the vast majority of people have never seen me play live. -- John Fogerty
Her eyes narrowed, but she wasn't yelling.I think she liked me... kind of. The way a mother would like an annoying spastic two year old who belonged to someone else. -- Robyn Peterman
Some people with Tourette's have flinging tics- sudden, seemingly motiveless urges or compulsions to throw objects..... (I see somewhat similar flinging behaviors- though not tics- in my two year old godson, now in a stage of primal antinomianism and anarchy) -- Oliver Sacks
A two-and-a-half-year-old is pretty experienced at making a mess, anyway. -- Bill Nye
Why would anyone steal a shopping cart? It's like stealing a two-year-old. -- Erma Bombeck
A 50-year-old company can innovate as well as two guys/gals in a garage. -- Guy Kawasaki
A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it. -- Jerry Seinfeld
Imagine a 15-year-old kid saying, 'I have two moms - it's cool.' I don't fear that at all. -- Henry Rollins
You can't live like a monk if you have two five-year-old twins. That ain't happening. Just the opposite, actually. -- Scott Ellis
Racism isn't born, folks, it's taught. I have a two-year-old son. You know what he hates? Naps! End of list. -- Denis Leary
Nothing is better than showing up twice a week, acting like a 12 year-old for two hours, and then going home. -- Reid Scott
Sometimes, you'll watch the news and you'll see two-year-old boys in South Africa, wearing 'Spider-Man' t-shirts. It's such a global phenomenon. -- James Vanderbilt
I think I need a little break. I've got a two-year old. I'll be part of The Leisure Class for a while. -- Lauren Ambrose
If you've ever hauled a 28-pound two-year-old around New York, you'll find that men fold at the knees a lot quicker than women. -- Anthony Bourdain
I'm trying to find a man to share my life with, but it's not been easy. I'm a 35-year-old woman with two small children. -- Nicole Kidman
I'm like a twenty-two-year-old kid in a new band trying to get noticed and break through, because the vast majority of people have never seen me play live. -- John Fogerty
What I discovered in Auschwitz is the human condition, the end point of a great adventure, where the European traveler arrived after his two-thousand-year-old moral and cultural history. -- Imre Kertesz
Yeah I'm thirty-six, but on the show I'm thirty-two. Nobody wants to watch a thirty-six year old woman, so they decided to make me thirty-two. Much more appealing somehow. -- Ellen DeGeneres
Two phrases I hate in reference to female characters are 'strong' and 'feisty.' They really annoy me. It's the most condescending thing. You say that about a three-year-old. It infantilises women. -- Helen Mirren
I didn't realize until I was older what a huge music fan my daddy really was, and actually that my grandma played banjo at one time, and I didn't even know that until a year or two ago. -- Alan Jackson
What I do remember is visualization of the sound of music, seeing bodies in movement in relation to how music sounded, because my mother practiced at the keyboard a lot and I also went to her lessons. As a two year old, three year old I remember seeing things in movement. -- Twyla Tharp
When I was a young mother at home with a two year old and a five year old, living on the Eastside in one of those neighborhoods where all the houses look the same, where all the cars look the same and the lawns look the same, I was writing in secret. -- Deb Caletti
As long as you think of your real self as the person you are, then of course you're going to be fearful of death. But what is a person? A person is a pattern of behavior, of a larger awareness. You know, the two-year-old dies before the three-year-old shows up, the three-year-old dies before the teenager shows up. -- Deepak Chopra
I write like a two-year-old and I can't spell -- Harry Redknapp
It was like being around a particularly irritating two-year-old. -- Charlaine Harris
At eighty-two, I feel like a twenty-year-old, but, unfortunately, there's never one around. -- Milton Berle
I'm not complicated at all. I say raps that your two-year-old son can learn. -- Snoop Dogg
The female attention I have to struggle hardest with is from my two-year-old daughter. -- Dan Stevens
No symphony orchestra ever played music like a two-year-old girl laughing with a puppy. -- Bernard Williams
My heart goes out to the grieving parents who lost their two-year-old or their newborn. -- Elizabeth Edwards
I see the mind of the five-year-old as a volcano with two vents: destructiveness and creativeness. -- Sylvia Ashton-Warner
In 1910, eighty-two-year-old Leo Tolstoy flees from his wife and dies in a railway station of exposure. -- Jon Winokur
I was a twenty-two-year-old single white female alone in a strange country where my sister had been killed. -- Karen Marie Moning
We're like a two-year old playing with fire ... we're messing around with something really dangerous and don't really understand what will happen. -- William F. Laurance
I have a two-year-old boy. Being his mom feels like I have a present I get to spend the rest of my life opening. -- Jewel
Americans are getting stronger. Twenty years ago, it took two people to carry ten dollars' worth of groceries. Today, a five-year-old can do it. -- Henny Youngman
I don't remember not singing. I started when I was, I don't know how - what, two years old, or a year old or something like that. -- Glen Campbell
I'm 74 years old and, even though I may be a bit of a rascal, 33 girls in two months seems to me too much even for a 30-year-old. -- Silvio Berlusconi
I have two sons, ages 38 and 25 in Texas, and my wife and seven year old daughter here in Nashville. On New Year's I'd rather be with them. -- Delbert McClinton
It has taken us two million years to elevate politics from the level of a monkey squabble, to a level comprehensible to a six year old child. -- Peter J. Carroll
Take any two-year-old through a car wash and their skulls are blown. FLAPS! FOAM! ROLLING THINGS! It's the closest they'll ever get to being inside a working spaceship. -- Drew Magary
Asked by reporters about his upcoming marriage to a forty-two-year-old woman, director Roman Polanski told reporters, `The way I look at it, she's the equivalent of three fourteen-year-olds.' -- David Letterman
I wasn't really that informed about the two-year-old. Oh, I'd read about them, and occasionally I'd see documentaries on the Discovery Channel showing two-year-olds in the wild, where they belong.. -- Ray Romano
Being defiant is a two-year-old who doesn't want to go to bed when he's tired. Being resolute is standing one's ground even in the face of opposition. It's a man's virtue, not a toddler's vice. -- Minisinoo

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