You Might Be A Redneck If quotes:

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You might be a redneck if your momma tore her best dress coon hunting. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if... your high school basketball game got rained out. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if...your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if every electrical outlet in your house is a fire hazard. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if directions to your house include turn off the paved road. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if in an effort to watch your cholesterol, you eat Spam Lite. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you have to go outside to get something out of the fridge. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you think that the styrofoam cooler is the greatest invention of all time. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if...the most serious loss from the earthquake was your Conway Twitty record collection. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you look upon a family reunion as a chance to meet 'Ms. Right -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if...you've been on TV more than times describing the sound of a tornado. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if...you bought a VCR so you could tape wrestling while you are at work. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if...Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy size bottle of ketchup. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if...you think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three of the primary colors. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the first words out of your mouth every time you see friends are Howdy!, Hey! or How Y'all Doin'? -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you consider a good tan to be the back of your neck and the left arm below the shirt sleeve. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your dogs name is Miller Light -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you own at least 20 baseball hats. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if The Salvation Army declines your mattress. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your local ambulance has a trailer hitch. -- Jeff Foxworthy
If your biggest tax deduction was bail money, you might be a redneck. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your sophisticated show-biz cousin is a rodeo clown. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police! -- Jeff Foxworthy
If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your dog can't watch you eat without gagging. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your birth announcement included the word rug rat. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you've ever stolen toilet paper from a public restroom. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you're still scalping tickets after the concert is over. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your anniversary present was getting the septic tank pumped. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you celebrate Groundhog Day because you believe in it. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger changed your life. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you dated your daddy's current wife in high school. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the tobacco chewers in your family aren't just men. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you were shooting pool when your kids were born. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if taking a dip has nothing to do with water. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you go to a Tupperware party for a haircut. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if people hear your car long before they see it. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you watch cartoons long after your kids get bored. -- Jeff Foxworthy
If you have more fish on your wall than pictures, you might be a redneck. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you have every episode of Hee Haw on tape. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your bumper sticker says, My other car is a combine. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you think the Mountain Men in Deliverance were just misunderstood. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet. -- Jeff Foxworthy
If you have ever spray-painted your girlfriends name on an overpass, you might be a redneck. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you consider pork and beans to be a gourmet food. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your pocketknife has ever been referred to as Exhibit A. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the UFO hotline limits you to one call a day. -- Jeff Foxworthy
If you think 'loading the dishwasher' means 'getting your wife drunk', you might be a redneck -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you use a radiator hose to fix your kitchen sink. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs. -- Jeff Foxworthy
If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if motel 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if Exxon and Conoco have offered you royalties for your hair. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the receptionist checks the rat traps at your place of business. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you grow Vidalia onions, rather than considering them a gourmet item. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you have a very special baseball cap, just for formal occasions. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your Momma would rather go the racetrack than the Kennedy Center. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if during your senior year you and your mother had homeroom together. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if there are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you work with a shirt off... and so does your husband. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if three quarters of the clothes you own have logos on them. -- Jeff Foxworthy
If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your wife has a beer belly and you find it attractive. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your wife keeps a can of Vienna sausage in her purse. -- Jeff Foxworthy
If the gas pedal on your car is shaped like a bare foot, you might be a redneck. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you're turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer. -- Jeff Foxworthy
If you think fast food is hittin a deer att 65 miles per hr.. you might be a redneck -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if it's easier to spray weed killer on your lawn than mow it. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you have a color coordinating rope that ties down your car hood. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if an expired license plate means another decoration for your living room wall. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your daughter's Barbie's Dream House has a clothesline in the front yard. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you saved lots of money on your honeymoon by going deer hunting. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you have been fired from a construction job because of your appearance. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you move your refrigerator and the grass underneath it has turned yellow. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you've ever stared at a can of orange juice because it said concentrate. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the best way to keep things cold is to leave'em in the shade. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you're a lite beer drinker, because you start drinking when it gets light. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general. -- Jeff Foxworthy
If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home, you might be a redneck. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your beer can collection is considered a tourist attraction in your home town. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your grandfather completely executes the pull my finger trick at the family reunion. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you consider your license plate personalized because your dad made it in prison. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you own all the components of soap on a rope except the soap. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if when you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank. -- Jeff Foxworthy
If you're afraid they might discover your redneck past, there are a hundred ways to cover your redneck past. -- Ben Folds
You might be a redneck if the dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you wish your outhouse was as nice as those at the state park. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you can tell your age by the number of rings in the bathtub. -- Jeff Foxworthy
If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck. -- Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you can amuse yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter. -- Jeff Foxworthy

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