Cactus quotes:

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  • Wilf: God bless the cactuses! The Doctor: That's cactI. Alien: And that's racist! -- Russell T Davies
  • The world is full of cactus, but we don't have to sit on it -- Will Foley
  • Don't jack off a cactus, you'll only hurt your hand and the cactus' feelings -- Tre Cool
  • Texas is a hell hole, man. Dirt, cactus, lizards, dirt, cactus, the Bush family... -- Christopher Titus
  • Juno MacGuff: "Thanks a heap coyote ugly. This cactus-gram stings worse than your abandonment. -- Diablo Cody
  • Hope is not a resting place but a starting point - a cactus, not a cushion -- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
  • What is the difference between a cactus and a conservative caucus? On a cactus, the pricks are on the outside. -- John Diefenbaker
  • Being negative only makes a difficult journey more difficult. You may be given a cactus, but you don't have to sit on it. -- Joyce Meyer
  • I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert. -- Demetri Martin
  • Even from far away, I could see people being chased by hellhounds, burned at the stake, forced to run naked through cactus patches or listen to opera music. -- Rick Riordan
  • I remember very clearly someone saying, 'Don't shake hands with the cactus,' and I thought, 'Well, why not? What could possibly go wrong?' Shaking hands is a friendly gesture. -- Benedict Cumberbatch
  • Mexican cars are just going to be lazy, feckless, flatulent, overweight, leaning against a fence asleep looking at a cactus with a blanket with a hole in the middle on as a coat. -- Richard Hammond
  • A whale is as unique as a cactus. But don't ask a whale to survive Death Valley. We all have special gifts. Where we use them and how determines whether we actually complete something. -- Max de Pree
  • He loved politics in large part exactly because it meant time spent with men like Cactus Jack Garner(who would be remembered for observing that the vice presidency was not worth a pitcher of warm piss). -- David McCullough
  • You can't learn anything from saguaro cactus, from ocotillo. They are just passing through; their roots, their much heralded dormancy in the dry season, these are only illusions of permanence. They know even less than you do. -- Barry Lopez
  • A creative person has to create. It doesn't really matter what you create. If such a dancer wanted to go out and build the cactus gardens where he could, in Mexico, let him do that, but something that is creative has to go on. -- Katherine Dunham
  • It is only the story...that saves our progeny from blundering like blind beggars into the spikes of the cactus fence.The story is our escort;without it,we are blind.Does the blind man own his escort?No,neither do we the story;rather,it is the story that owns us. -- Chinua Achebe
  • When I write "paradise" I mean not only apple trees and golden women but also scorpions and tarantulas and flies, rattlesnakes and Gila monsters, sandstorms, volcanoes and earthquakes, bacteria and bear, cactus, yucca, bladderweed, ocotillo and mesquite, flash floods and quicksand, and yes - disease and death and the rotting of flesh. -- Edward Abbey
  • The name says it all. That's where Dad (Hades) tries out his new punishment ideas, but he says the traditional ones still work best: the lava flows, the minefields full of exploding surprises, burning at the stake, running naked through cactus patches... You name it, we've got it here - Nico di Angelo -- Rick Riordan
  • My father was Abe Burrows, who was a Broadway legend. 'Guys and Dolls,' 'How to Succeed,' 'Cactus Flower,' '40 Karats,' 'Can-Can,' 'Happy Hunting,' 'Reclining Figure,' it goes on. He was a legend, and when I was growing up, I was Abe Burrows' kid. That was my self-esteem. -- James Burrows
  • John flung himself into a pseudo-karate stance, one hand poised behind him and one in front, posed like a cartoon cactus. I thought for an odd moment he had moved his limbs so fast they had made that whoosh sound through air but then I realized John was making that sound with his mouth. -- David Wong
  • In the first place you can't see anything from a car; you've got to get out of the goddamned contraption and walk, better yet crawl, on hands and knees, over the sandstone and through the thornbush and cactus. When traces of blood begin to mark your trail you'll begin to see something, maybe. Probably not. -- Edward Abbey
  • She was elusive. She was today. She was tomorrow. She was the faintest scent of a cactus flower, the flitting shadow of an elf owl. We did not know what to make of her. In our minds we tried to pin her to a cork board like a butterfly, but the pin merely went through and away she flew. -- Jerry Spinelli
  • Who wants to become a writer? And why? Because it's the answer to everything. ... It's the streaming reason for living. To note, to pin down, to build up, to create, to be astonished at nothing, to cherish the oddities, to let nothing go down the drain, to make something, to make a great flower out of life, even if it's a cactus. -- Enid Bagnold
  • The desert seems to be a brown wasteland of dry, prickly scrub whose only purpose is to serve as a setting for the majestic saguaros. Then, little by little, the plants of the desert begin to identify themselves: the porcupiny yucca, the beaver tail and prickly pear and barrel cacti, buckhorn and staghorn and devil's fingers, the tall, sky-reaching tendrils of the ocotillo. -- Jerry Spinelli
  • Adolescence is like cactus. -- Anais Nin
  • People trample over flowers, yet only to embrace a cactus. -- James Joyce
  • What is the meaning of a cactus flower? It exists, that's all. -- Marty Rubin
  • A decent man would stand out like a cactus on an ice floe. -- Timothy Egan
  • Hope is not a resting place but a starting point - a cactus, not a cushion. -- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
  • I want my body to help fertilize the growth of a cactus or cliff rose or sagebrush or tree. -- Edward Abbey
  • I have learned the difference between a cactus and a caucus. On a cactus, the pricks are on the outside. -- Mo Udall
  • I had forgotten that talking to you is like trying to pet a cactus." Saiman said dryly. "Thank you for reminding me." "Always happy to oblige. -- Ilona Andrews
  • Too much detail can bog down any story. Enough with the history of gunpowder, the geology of Hawaii, the processes of whaling, and cactus and tumbleweed. -- Edward M. Lerner
  • I realize all guys have thorns. But I am a rose, and she chose a cactus over me. I wish her luck with her dry, desert-like existence with him. -- Jarod Kintz
  • I'm like the trunk of a cactus... I take in a dose of culture and time with friends, then I retreat and go live on it for awhile until I get thirsty again. -- Nancy Horan
  • I'm an observer of life. I like to watch people, and I like to watch cactus. I like to talk to mountains and communicate with my friends in the other spheres and dimensions. -- Frederick Lindemann, 1st Viscount Cherwell
  • I consider it the highest compliment when my employees go out and start their own companies in competition with me. I always send them a plant to wish them well. Of course, it's a cactus -- Norman Brodsky
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