Bagpipes quotes:

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  • When you've heard one bagpipe tune, you've heard them both. -- Jack Finney
  • Rock music sounds like an octopus making love to a bagpipe. -- Brother Dave Gardner
  • ...I got to try the bagpipes. It was like trying to blow an octopus. -- James Galway
  • The bagpipes sound exactly the same when you have finished as when you started -- Thomas Beecham
  • I'll bet there aren't too many people hooked on crack who can play the bagpipes. -- George Carlin
  • Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe. -- Lee Trevino
  • The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scotts as a joke, but the Scotts haven't seen the joke yet. -- Oliver Herford
  • How little is required for pleasure! The sound of a bagpipe - without music, life would be an error. -- Friedrich Nietzsche
  • It's hard to play with a bagpipe player. It's like an exotic bird. I love the sound, it's like strangling a goose. -- Tom Waits
  • The tune was wailing and mournful, almost flagrantly so, and the total effect was of a heartbroken piccolo being parted forever from its bagpipe lover. -- Peter S. Beagle
  • Some men there are love not a gaping pig, some that are mad if they behold a cat, and others when the bagpipe sings I the nose cannot contain their urine. -- William Shakespeare
  • I find brass bands have a melancholy sound. All right out of doors, of course - fifty miles away. Like bagpipes, they turn what had been a dream into a public nuisance. -- Thomas Beecham
  • Constable Moore had reached the age when men can subject their bodies to the worst irritations - whisky, cigars, woolen clothes, bagpipes - without feeling a thing or, at least, without letting on. -- Neal Stephenson
  • If the Scottish want to break away, I shall stand on Hadrian's Wall with a teary handkerchief, and say: 'Good riddance to the lot of you, and take your stupid bagpipes with you.' -- Jeremy Clarkson
  • The reason I'm patriotic about Scotland is because I think it's been dealt a really hard hand. It's marketed the world over as . . . haggis . . . bagpipes. But no one ever puts anything back into it. -- Alexander McQueen
  • These are bagpipes. I understand the inventor of the bagpipes was inspired when he saw a man carrying an indignant, asthmatic pig under his arm. Unfortunately, the man-made sound never equalled the purity of the sound achieved by the pig. -- Alfred Hitchcock
  • The Scots are subsidy junkies whingeing like a trampled bagpipe as they wait for their next fix of English taxpayers' money. -- Christopher Monckton, 3rd Viscount Monckton of Brenchley
  • When I hear the bagpipes, it makes the hairs on my neck stand on end. It always makes me weep. -- Ashley Jensen
  • Scottish bagpipe has two tenors and one bass - three drone pipes - and then the one chanter. If you put bagpipes together, it creates such a fine sound. -- Yoshi Wada
  • Constable Moore had reached the age when men can subject their bodies to the worst irritations - whiskey, cigars, woolen clothes, bagpipes - without feeling a thing or, at least, without letting on." -- Neal Stephenson
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