Tom Sawyer Quotes in The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003)

Allan Quatermain: Now, would you like to learn to shoot?

Tom Sawyer: I can already.

Allan Quatermain: Oh, I saw. Very American. Fire enough bullets and hope to hit the target.

Allan Quartermain: Well, we were the faster, but now we're the tortoise to his hare.

Dr. Henry Jekyll: So, we're done?

Tom Sawyer: No, we're alive. If M has any idea to the contrary, that gives us an edge.

Captain Nemo: The sea is vast, he could be anywhere.

Tom Sawyer: Yeah, well, I'm an optimist, now maybe that's a crime to you twisted so-and-so's but it keeps me from going crazy.

Mina Harker: Your optimism's out of place.

Tom Sawyer: You're wrong! Because we'll get out, man... at least, I will. That other agent I told you about... was my childhood friend. We were agents together until the Fantom shot him dead. Now you can be done, but I am not. I will avenge his death.

Dr. Henry Jekyll: It's not about any one of us, Tom, it's bigger than that.

Tom Sawyer: Yes, it is, Jekyll! The fate for the world is in our hands... the world! So M tricked you, he brought you all together and you walked straight into his trap. But the way that I see it, that's the part he did wrong... He brought you together.

Dr. Henry Jekyll: He has a point.

Allan Quartermain: And the boy becomes a man... perhaps a leader of men.

Mina Harker: And Women.

Dorian Gray: I'm an immortal, sir, not a gazelle. How can we outrun this?

[Tom Sawyer brings out Nemo's car]

Tom Sawyer: Care for a spin?

[Clanging metal sounds from inside Nautilus]

Tom Sawyer: What is it?

Captain Nemo: The sound of treachery.

Allan Quatermain: [sniffs air] He's afraid.

Tom Sawyer: [sniffs air] I don't smell anything.

[Sawyer pushes Quatermain out of the way of a thrown knife]

Tom Sawyer: Look out!

[they both fall over]

Tom Sawyer: [smiling] Eyes open, boy. I can't protect you all the time!

Tom Sawyer: Boy. They told me European women had funny ways.

Allan Quartermain: Chilao!

[a target is slung into the ocean. Sawyer hoists the elephant gun]

Allan Quartermain: Aim.

Tom Sawyer: That's easy.

Allan Quartermain: Adjust for wind and target movement.

Tom Sawyer: That's easy, too.

Allan Quartermain: Here's the part that's not. You have to feel the shot. Take your time with it. You have all the time you need. All the time in the world.

Allan Quartermain: The Phantom is M. And the hunt is still on.

Dr. Henry Jekyll: What are you talking about?

Allan Quartermain: The Phantom is M. The same man who recruited us.

Dr. Henry Jekyll: [trying to examine Allan's wound] Let me see that.

[he is shrugged off]

Captain Nemo: But how?

Allan Quartermain: We'll get our answers. Where are the others?

Mina Harker: [entering] Dorian's missing in action. And Mr. Skinner must have fled when he realized we knew.

Allan Quartermain: [concerned] Sawyer?

Tom Sawyer: [entering with a bloody lip] He'll live to fight another day.

Mina Harker: [advances towards Tom, he draws back] Don't worry, I've had my fill of throats for this evening.

[Chasing Moriarty, Tom Sawyer bumps into an invisible man]

Tom Sawyer: Skinner?

[to Quatermain]

Tom Sawyer: It's okay! It's Skinner!

[to the invisible man]

Tom Sawyer: What the hell are you doing here?

Sanderson Reed: What makes you think I'm Skinner, huh?

Tom Sawyer: [Skinner has been burnt by a flamethrower] Are you okay?

Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man): That's the last time I play with matches!

Mr. Hyde: Don't be afraid.

Tom Sawyer: Who says I'm afraid?

Mr. Hyde: YOU DO!

[In an eyeblink he rips a chain from the wall and sends it flying over Sawyer's head]

Mr. Hyde: YOU STINK OF FEAR!

[Quatermain pulls Sawyer out from under some falling rubble]

Allan Quatermain: Heh. That was naughty.

Tom Sawyer: Thanks.

Allan Quatermain: Eyes open, boy. I can't protect you all the time.

Mina Harker: And you are?

Tom Sawyer: Special Agent Sawyer, American Secret Service.

Tom Sawyer: Huck! Hey, Huck! Muff Potter's my friend. And when a friend's in trouble, you can't run away.

Becky Thatcher: Oh Tom, it's, it's, what is it?

Tom Sawyer: It's your engagement ring.

Becky Thatcher: It's beautiful.

Tom Sawyer: It sure is. Why when I was engaged to Amy Lawrence she...

Becky Thatcher: What? You mean I'm not the first?

Tom Sawyer: No Becky, that was ages ago. Two months at least.

Becky Thatcher: I hate you. I hate you and I hope you die.

Tom Sawyer: Muff's innocent Huck, we gotta help him.

Huck Finn: We ain't gotta do nothing.

Tom Sawyer: You'd let him hang for something he didn't do.

Huck Finn: It ain't no skin off my back.

Tom Sawyer: Hello Huck!

Huck Finn: Hello yourself and see how you like it.

Tom Sawyer: Watcha doin' down here?

Huck Finn: Lookin for jackasses.

Tom Sawyer: Under a bridge?

Huck Finn: I found one, didn't I?

Tom Sawyer, Huck Finn: [both laugh]

Injun Joe: [Injun Joe's about to stab Tom]

Huck Finn: HEY!

[kicks Injun Joe]

Injun Joe: I know you.

Tom Sawyer: [Huck pushes Tom behind him] Huck...

Injun Joe: You're Pap Finn's boy... Blueberry.

Huck Finn: Huckleberry.

Injun Joe: Your daddy was the best knife fighter on the Mississippi. Did he teach you?

Huck Finn: He taught me.

Injun Joe: Ahhh then let's see what you got, river trash.

[laughs]

Huck Finn: [pulls out knife] I ain't river trash!

Injun Joe: Come on!

Huck Finn: [Huck swings knife, Injun Joe dodges]

Injun Joe: [Injun Joe slams Huck into wall]

Huck Finn: [small yelp]

Injun Joe: You got guts boy. And in a minute they're gonna be on the ground.

Tom Sawyer: Let's see ya hit this!

Injun Joe: [turns around]

Tom Sawyer: [holds chest over the hole]

Injun Joe: NOOOOOO!

Tom Sawyer: So why'd ya come back, Huck?

Huck Finn: Figured if you did it alone, you'd probably splotch it up.

Tom Sawyer: Yeah, probably.

Tom Sawyer: I thought we was friends Huck.

Huck Finn: You thought wrong. I ain't got no friends. Ain't got time for 'em. But if I did have one I'd want him to be like you.

Huck Finn: According to this, you should be dead and rottin' right about now.

Tom Sawyer: I had to help Muff. Not helpin' him woulda been wrong.

Huck Finn: I know but, you swore an oath Tom, don't that mean anythin' to ya?

Tom Sawyer: Of course it does. It's just, it felt like the right thing to do. Huck it was the right thing to do.

Huck Finn: No. You swore an oath Tom, you swore.

Tom Sawyer: What if we could get the map? That'd prove Muff's innocent and we wouldn't break our oath.

Huck Finn: Only one problem. That map is in Injun Joe's pocket.

Huck Finn: You gonna let her do that to you?

Tom Sawyer: I think she likes me.

Huck Finn: She pushes you off a bridge cuz she likes you?

Tom Sawyer: [Tom nods]

Huck Finn: [Huck blows smoke in Tom's face] I think you're both crazy.

Tom Sawyer: Hey Huck watcha got in the sack?

Huck Finn: Dead cat. Wagon run over 'em. Guts come out both ends.

Tom Sawyer: What's a dead cat good for?

Huck Finn: To cure warts away.

Tom Sawyer: Well, I got one. How's it work?

Huck Finn: You take your dead cat to the graveyard on the day somebody wicked's been buried, and when the devil comes, you heave your cat at him and say "Devil follow corpse, cat follow devil, warts follow cat, I'm done with you". That'll fetch any wart.

Tom Sawyer: Sounds right. So when are you gonna try it?

Huck Finn: Tonight.

Tom Sawyer: Lemme go with ya, Huck.

Huck Finn: [shakes head] You might get scared.

Tom Sawyer, Huck Finn: [at the graveyard]

Huck Finn: [Huck making scary sounds] Dead seems kinda lively tonight don't they?

Huck Finn: [whirls around] HAH!

Tom Sawyer: [Tom yelps]

Huck Finn: [Huck grins]

Huck Finn: He's drunk asleep. Shouldn't be too hard to get that map.

Tom Sawyer: Then let's get it and git.

Tom Sawyer: [begins approaching Injun Joe, then notices Huck's not following] Ain't ya comin'?

Huck Finn: One map don't need the two of us. I'll wait here.

Tom Sawyer: So why'd ya come back Huck?

Huck Finn: When a friend's in trouble, you don't run away.

[first lines]

Tom Sawyer: Hello Huckleberry.

Huckleberry Finn: How come you're playin' hooky?

Tom Sawyer: Same as you.

Huckleberry Finn: Never spent a day in school in my life.

Becky Thatcher: Oh Tom. So I'm not the first one you've been engaged to. Philanderer!

Tom Sawyer: What?

Becky Thatcher: Well that's what you are.

Tom Sawyer: Yeah but what does it mean?

Becky Thatcher: I'm not sure. But even if I did know I wouldn't tell you.

Tom Sawyer: Heck, girls aint no fun. Always gigglin' or weepin'.

Joe Jefferson: Whata you know about girls?

Tom Sawyer: I was engaged to Amy Lawrence... always gigglin' or weepin'.

Tom Sawyer: Hucky, whata ya reckon'll come of this?

Huckleberry Finn: If Doc Robinson dies I reckon hangin'll come of it.

Tom Sawyer: [sings v.o] If'n I was God/ well just for spite/ I wouldn't set the sun at night/ till everyone was treated right/ by everyone else they see.

Tom Sawyer: [choking on pipe smoke] If'n I had known how much fun smokin' was, I would have started long ago.

[after Tom comes home, Aunt Polly grabs his ear, takes him outside to the laundry with Cousin Sidney and Mary]

Aunt Polly: Whiskey! The stinking smell of whiskey in my house! Now, give me that shirt.

[He gives the shirt to her]

Tom Sawyer: But, it saved Muff's leg! You see this snake? It was... It was just jumped out from under the rock, bit Muff's part of a leg and slithered away. Left him lying in the dirt, writhing and screaming, close to death!

Aunt Polly: Lies, lies and more lies!

Cousin Sidney: What kind of snake?

Aunt Polly: Sidney, you stay out of this. Mary?

Tom Sawyer: But, this stranger came along with this snake remedy and he was pouring on Muff's leg. He was kicking so that some of it just happened to splash on my shirt and it was just healed up like magic. Can't you see the fang marks.

Aunt Polly: Fang marks?

[grabs him, slap him]

Aunt Polly: Upstairs, no supper. Upstairs.

Tom Sawyer: But, Aunt Polly...

[sighs, he goes back inside, upstairs to bed, She washes the shirt in the laundry]

Cousin Sidney: Snakebite remedy. That's a good one.

Aunt Polly: Yes, it was.

Tom Sawyer: [Looking at Twain's library] These must be those classics everyone talks about.

Huck Finn: What are classics?

Mark Twain: Something everyone wants to have read but don't want to read.

Tom Sawyer: We're only waiting for the right moment now.

Becky Thatcher: What are you talking about?

Huck Finn: Yeah?

Tom Sawyer: Becky, do you swear not to tell?

Becky Thatcher: Sure.

Tom Sawyer: On your grandmother's bones?

[Becky rolls her eyes]

Tom Sawyer: Well, do ya?

Becky Thatcher: Yeah.

Tom Sawyer: We're gonna hijack this balloon.

Becky Thatcher: What?

Huck Finn: Hijack?

Tom Sawyer: Just imagine: Tom Sawyer, aeronort, saves airborne friends from madman's death wish.

Tom Sawyer: Supposing we do die? Is there really a heaven or a hell?

Mark Twain: Oh, I don't know about that. I don't wish to express an opinion. You see, I have friends in both places.

Tom Sawyer: Life is full of men who never get their monkeys.